When Twilight Ends
by story2tell
Summary: Something is happening in the little sleepy town of Forks. Something evil. Under the cover of darkness it strikes without warning, killing in the most savage fashion. And this time, the Cullens have no control. *real summary inside!*
1. Chapter 1

Something is happening in the small, sleepy town of Forks, Washington. Something unexplainable. Something dangerous. Something evil.

Under the cover of darkness it strikes without warning, killing in the most savage fashion. No one knows where it comes from. No one knows when it will happen again.

Bella's transformation is slowly slipping closer, no longer shadowed by visible danger. But something has been overlooked-a loose end had been left undone, an error gone unnoticed. And now, it has been set loose.

The Cullens, the Werewolves, and Bella are now racing time to stop the destruction reeking havoc upon the little world of Forks. Only one knows the key to unlocking the deadly secrets, only one knows the truth.

As the seconds tick by, Edward finds himself amidst a dangerous plot and he is forced to make a decision that could change the path of destiny and forever.

But will he make the right choice? Even if it meant sacrificing what is most sacred to him?

****

I could smell the human blood from where I stood-it wafted in the breeze, catching me unexpectedly in the face. It was an unfamiliar scent, something I have never smelled before. It pulsed hot but weak through nearby veins. From the potent smell, though, I knew it was not a human carrying the blood but a newborn, somewhere hidden among the thickets, breathing ragged and fast. I crouched in an instant, prepared for an attack. But nothing jumped out at me. I crept forward, slowly rotating as I tried to pinpoint the smell, tensed like a lion. _Come on...show yourself, you coward._

I tuned out the sounds of the midnight wood around me and focused my mind on the unseen vampire. I listened, hoping its thoughts would break through the other sounds, directing me to its hiding place. But to, my surprise, nothing registered; I heard only the breathing-hard and shallow. Realization sank in as I listened to the breathing and I inhaled a sharp breath. The newborn was somehow, but most definitely hurt.

With a hand, I brushed aside a curtain of stringy moss and found the victim I had been looking for; it wasn't what I expected at all. The newborn lay curled up amidst sticks, dirt, and rock; it hands folded to its chest as though it slept. Its whole body heaved with labored breathing; small, pale fingers curled unconsciously around a twig, desperately trying to alleviate some sort of unseen pain. _This is odd... _As I drew cautiously closer, I realized the vampire was only a young girl, her head full of wildly curled dark hair that ended at the nape of her neck. Her eyes were closed and her lips were parted as she gasped in each breath, sounding as though she had nearly been suffocated. A sparse sprinkle of freckles lightly dotted her nose and cheeks, something I had never seen before on the flawless skin of a vampire. I reached out to touch her mind once more but, again, received nothing in return. It unnerved me-Bella was the only one whose thoughts I couldn't hear.

Quietly, I knelt down beside the tiny body and laid an unsure hand on her shoulder. At the touch, her breathing abruptly stopped and she lay quite still as though dead. A weak, barely audible warning growl vibrated from her chest but then she was silent, obviously spent.

"Are you alright?" I asked softly, lowering my face so that I was within inches of her small, freckled nose.

Her eyes fluttered open and I saw her pupils were dilated over blood-red irises. They flickered across my face, glazed and unseeing then closed. She still wasn't breathing, inert and white like a corpse. Gently as I could, for I was not fully understanding the state she was in, I turned her over and examined her body, looking for anything out of the ordinary-for a vampire at least. Her clothing was torn and bloodstained and she wore neither shoes nor socks. Maybe she was still in her transformation and had not yet been completely converted. But I knew that couldn't be as I traced a finger over the well-healed scar on the side of her neck.

I studied her face again, contemplating hard. Who would have bit her then left her body without draining her completely of her life source? I smoothed back wild wisps of her dark hair and noticed she couldn't be any older than thirteen or fourteen when she had been bit, which couldn't have been more than a few weeks ago. I sat back on my heels and looked around. Carlisle wouldn't mind a new addition. I couldn't just leave the girl out here by herself...she was bond to get into some sort of trouble. She would learn our ways and become part of our family.

I lifted her as I stood. Her head lolled unresponsively to her shoulder and her white arm dangled limply while the other one rested across her stomach. I sighed and paused briefly. I didn't even get to hunt.

***

Carlisle was instantly at my side as soon as I crossed the threshold; his golden eyes shocked but also curious. He was followed by Alice, Emmett, and Jasper, who were soon joined by Esme and Rosalie.

"What happened?" Carlisle asked, examining the lifeless bundle in my arms. The newborn hadn't moved since I head left the forest, neither had she breathed nor made a sound. _What did you do? _I heard the thought from the doctor and glared at him. Before I could retort back, my brother voiced the same question.

"Did you lose control?" Emmett asked, bewilderment all over his face. I glared at him as well, miffed by the ridiculous notion.

"Have I been gone for three days?" I growled, shifting the girl's weight so that her head no longer hung at an awkward position. I turned back to Carlisle, who now looked apologetic. "I found her, actually, in the forest where I was hunting. Something's wrong with her-but I'm not sure what."

_Obviously something is wrong with her. _I heard the sneer come from stuck-up Rosalie. _She isn't moving. _I shot a camouflaged hiss at her.

Carlisle ignored us and peeled back an eyelid, revealing her irises. To my surprise, the blood red had paled to an almost pink.

"What's wrong with her eyes?" Alice asked, raising an eyebrow.

Carlisle sighed, "I know what's wrong," he said solemnly, running a pale hand through his blond hair. He released the lid and let it fall back into place. "It happens rarely...in fact I've never really seen it happen before."

I was confused as to what Carlisle was getting at. I waited for him to continue and maybe make more sense. He was now tilting her head back against my arm, and examining the half-moon scar etched in her neck. Like I had, he traced a finger over it, thinking to himself. I didn't bother to delve into his thoughts, because they probably wouldn't make any sense to me-so I waited for him to speak again; I could feel the agitation creeping into my voice when I urged him to go on.

"Well...?"

Carlisle looked at me and he saw the impatience. "When she had been fully converted," he began again, studying each of our faces in turn. "For some reason-and I don't know what-" he added quickly when Alice opened her mouth to speak. She snapped it shut, looking somewhat chagrined.

_I was only going to ask a question, _her thoughts shouted at me and I shot a look at her that said to keep her thoughts to herself.

"For some reason," Carlisle repeated, "her instincts didn't kick in and I don't know why." This fact seemed to bother him immensely.

"Her instincts didn't kick in?" Emmett once again looked bewildered. "That sounds stupid. Wouldn't she have gotten hungry enough to get the incentive to hunt?"

Carlisle shrugged, "Like I said-I don't know a lot about this occurrence. It _is_ very rare."

Esme was standing on tiptoes to look over Jasper, who was prodding the newborn's neck, as she studied the body I cradled. "What are we supposed to do then?" she asked, tucking a strand of caramel colored hair behind her ear.

"The obvious," her husband concluded. "We teach her hunt and what not to hunt," he smiled grimly at that. _We don't want her taking a bite out of Bella the next time she comes over. _I tried to cover the wince on my face, Carlisle acted like he didn't notice; he patted the newborn on the head and smiled for real this time. "She'll be fine after that."

As he said this, I felt a perplexity swelling in my chest and I hesitated to say what had been bothering the past hour or so. Would the fact that she was starved, hinder my ability to read her thoughts? I cringed at that. Bella hadn't been starved. But Bella wasn't a vampire...yet.

_What's bothering your mind, Edward? _Carlisle thoughts pushed through mine and I looked at him. He back was turned to me and he was rummaging through a nearby cupboard. _You're grimacing like a gargoyle over there._

I sighed. Nothing escaped my father's well-trained eyes. He was a doctor after all. I laid the young vampire on the floor and walked over to him, leaning against his shoulder as I talked. "I wasn't able to hear her thoughts in the forest," I whispered as he continued to search. "Is it because she was starved?"

Carlisle withdrew a container, his eyebrows puckered in thought-I caught a whiff of animal blood. _Who knows...maybe she has an extra ability like you or Alice. Maybe she's like Bella, unable to be touched beyond the physical. _

I frowned at that. There was someone out there who was like Bella? No, I shook my head; there was _no one_ like Bella.

I turned to see Alice kneeling over the newborn's body. "Oh, Edward, she's just a doll," she gushed. Mentally she said: _you know, I haven't found a flower girl yet for your wedding, I don't think Bella would mind her._

I shook my head more out of knee-jerking reflex than anything else. "She is going to be nowhere near Bella until she gains enough control," I growled between gritted teeth. "_No where._" I emphasized, jabbing a finger at my over-excited sister.

She ignored me as usual.

"Isn't that weird that she has freckles? I thought the vampires couldn't have freckles?" Alice eyed Carlisle suspiciously as he began to work some old animal blood down the girl's throat. He chuckled and shrugged.

"Just another mystery, I suppose." Carlisle drew back the glass, which was now stained red, and waited for the newborn to respond.

The curly-headed girl shifted suddenly and I leaned in, curiosity getting the better of me. Her eyelids fluttered open, darkening in color at the taste of blood. She looked around at us her eyes wary and alarmed at the same time.

"Are you feeling sick to your stomach?" Esme asked, picking a dried leaf from the curls. I could see the motherly instincts kicking in.

The stranger nodded as she gulped in a breath of air.

"Would you like some more?"

She nodded hungrily, sitting up and reaching for the glass that Carlisle held. She was breathing ragged again; thirst was twisting her expression, contorting the freckles into a swirled pattern. "Please," she croaked and I could hear a light, Brooklyn accent lancing her words. "It hurts."

I nodded sympathetically. If she didn't have any instincts before, she was sure feeling them now. I understood completely. I imagined that her whole body was now screaming its rage for the want of blood. Her stomach was twisted in need and her throat burned from the rush of venom, like vomit, pushing its way up.

Carlisle held the glass to her lips again and she swallowed quickly, her eyes darkening by the second.

"What's your name?" Emmett boomed out without thinking, leaning in to look her in the face. Startled, the girl choked then sprayed out a shower of blood. Squealing like a rabbit caught in a trap, she scrambled backward, her need to protect herself overcoming her thirst for a brief moment.

"That was nicely handled," I spat, tossing my hands up into the air as feral snarls ripped from the girl's throat, though still somewhat weak.

"Calm down," Carlisle coaxed in his welcoming voice, setting the blood aside, and shooting a disapproving glance at Emmett. My brother only looked slightly ashamed. "I promise we will not hurt you,"

"It was just a question," he protested. "I wanted to know."

Rosalie hissed her annoyance at him, her golden eyes rolling towards the ceiling.

"What?" Emmett looked at her pleadingly, "Stop ganging up on me-it was just a question!"

The newborn had stopped growling and was watching the exchange with curious interest. Cautiously she crept back towards us, staring at the blood that her body was crying out for. "Can I have some more?" she asked, no longer afraid.

I struck by the innocence she displayed; the vampire in her did nothing to deter her. I wondered what had happened to her-how she had gotten bitten and how she had escaped alive-well, sort of.

With small hands, she drew the glass towards herself, her eyes still watching us, as though she wasn't sure what to make of it all.

"What's your name, little one?" Carlisle asked this question, his voice gentle and soothing next to Emmett's intimidating one.

"Addison." She said with her Brooklyn accent, blinking quickly, looking surprised at herself.

Carlisle cocked his head. "What?"

"My name is Addison," she repeated, this time a wide smile flashing across her face. "But everyone just calls me Addy."

Addy. I thought, turning the name around in my head. What an interesting name.

***

Dawn was breaking the horizon as I made my way up to Bella's house. Pastel pink and orange painted the sky gently; the yellow globe was already crowned with a circle of gray clouds.

I looked up, out of habit, at Bella's open window. The pale blue drapes fluttered softly in the chilled breeze that wafted through the yard. I felt a pang of guilt and wondered how late she had stayed up waiting for me. Maybe I should have called to tell her everything was fine and there was no need to worry. Leave it to me to not think about that. I looked towards the driveway and didn't see the cruiser. Charlie was gone which meant I could go through the front door.

I unlocked the door and quietly, like a wraith, made my way down the dark hall and to the glow of the light coming from the kitchen.

"Bella?" I called lightly. I looked around the empty kitchen.

No answer, only the faint dripping of the faucet and the drone of the refrigerator.

I climbed the staircase and opened the door to her room. I found her, curled up asleep on the rocking chair. She must have fallen asleep waiting for me. The guilt flooded me stronger this time and I wanted to kick myself. She probably had a heart attack wondering where I was.

Gently, I lifted her from the chair and inhaled her flowery scent, enjoying the banquet. She felt more fragile than usual in my arms, now having carried that vampire who was much too frail for a vampire to be. I laid her in her bed and covered her with her quilt. She shifted but didn't wake. I kissed her forehead softly and went to settle in my familiar rocking chair. It creaked as I pushed it back and forth, my thoughts drifting as I watched my angel sleep. I counted the tiny, blue veins etched in her eyelids like I had a billion times before. What would she think when I told her about out new addition? It was always a mystery for me to solve, the way she thinks. When I expect her to do one thing, she always ends up doing something entirely different. It was mind-boggling.

The morning brightened slightly and it wasn't long after sunrise before Bella suddenly stretched, a soft yawn issuing from her mouth. I was instantly at her side, wanting her to know that I was there; her chocolate brown eyes stared up at me.

"Good morning," I said pleasantly, touching the tip of her nose with a finger. She smiled sleepily, stretching her arms above her head. I waited patiently for her to fully wake up, knowing the inquisition would soon start.

"Good morning," she repeated with another yawn. Then she suddenly frowned. Uh-oh. I braced myself for the rush of questions to come, camouflaging the wince crossing across my face. "Where were you last night; I waited for you?" She eyed me suspiciously.

I sighed. There was no escaping the inevitable. "I got a little sidetracked."

One of her small fingers reached up to trace the dark circles under my eyes. Her finger was warm against my skin. "You're thirsty," she accused. "I thought you went hunting last night." She glared at me, expecting the truth.

I shrugged nonchalantly, "as I said-I got a little sidetracked."

I saw instant alarm fill her wide eyes. "What happened?" I could hear her heart accelerate suddenly and I anxiously tried to calm her.

"Nothing is wrong, Bella," I promised, drawing her into my lap and kissing the top of her head. "There is absolutely no need to fret, everything is now under control."

Oops. That was the wrong thing to say, I realized. Her faced paled, turning her ivory skin chalky, alarm turning fear. I made it sound like something _had_ been wrong. "Bella, I didn't mean it like that," I insisted quickly, smoothing her hair soothingly. "I swear, nothing bad happened."

Bella calmed slightly, and she rested a hand on my chest as she thought. "But _something did_ happen." She spoke after a moment, looking reproachful. I realized there was no way around this; nothing could be hidden from Bella for too long.

"Yes..." I articulated slowly, stalling.

"And," she prodded, her forehead creasing.

"I found another vampire in the forest as I was hunting," I finally admitted in defeat. She blinked her surprise. "It was a newborn, weak from starvation. I found her in some thickets."

A strange expression crossed Bella's face and her eyes grew distant. "_Her_?"

Her tone of voice made me frown. What was she getting at? "Well, yes, the newborn was female."

Something flickered across her face and she turned her head away, her eyebrows pulling together. A couple minutes past before I broke the silence, unable to stand it any longer. "Dear God, Bella," I said in irritation. "_What are you thinking_?"

I didn't receive an answer, which made me even more impatient. "Bella?"

Finally, she turned to look at me, her face oddly untroubled. "Do I get to meet her?"

My eyes widened and I felt a momentary spasm of panic. "Of course not!" I snapped. "She's a newborn; she wouldn't be able to control herself around you." I paused, struggling to contain my sudden emotions Bella's simple question had raised. "It wouldn't be safe." I punctuated my retort with that statement, crossing my arms.

I could see Bella grow defiant. She stuck out her chin slightly and scowled at me. "I want to meet her." She demanded. "You would protect me."

I refrained from rolling my eyes. "I wouldn't just stick you in danger like that, Bella, not when I know that Addison is only a freshly born vampire."

"_Addison_?" there was that tone again, making me lose my train of thought for a moment.

"Umm...yes, but she says that she's called 'Addy'." I clarified uneasily.

Bella's left eye twitched ever so slightly. "_Addy_?"

This time I hesitated, thinking hard, studying the expression on her face. Then suddenly something clicked. I pushed back a chuckle threatening to expose itself. "Bella, are you _jealous_?"

A beautiful, red blush stained Bella's cheeks and for a moment she was flustered. She had no idea how cute she was when she was like this.

"No," she retorted after finding her voice. "That's ridiculous. Why would_ I_ be jealous of _her_?"

But I could see it clearly on her face. Laughing quietly, I drew her to my chest and kissed the top of her hair. Her heart quickened at my touch and her body warmed even more. "Bella, she is only thirteen or so, why would I find her attractive when I have you to deal with?"

Bella didn't answer. Instead, she rested her head on my shoulder, silent in thought, her body relaxing with each breath. I could feel the hotness of her breath on my neck and the thrumming of her heart against my chest. I rested my cheek on her hair and sighed, taking in her scent and reveling in its sweetness.

It was several minutes before I felt the vibration of her speaking against my neck. "I still want to meet her."

I clenched my jaw, refusing to give in to her bait. I was not going to argue about this with her.

She continued: "You know, I will be part of her family soon."

I felt that familiar tightening in my stomach at the mention of her transformation. I tried not to let it show, but it was hard not to keep my body from freezing up. I quickly hid my pained expression. How could I damn an angel? How?

Bella felt my sudden tenseness and pulled away. Her solemn eyes rose to meet mine. "I'm sorry," she whispered, guilt becoming clear on her face for bringing up the subject. Or maybe she felt bad for ruining the mood. Whatever it was, she looked so miserable for making me upset that I couldn't stay that way for long. I let a cautious smile spread across my face and leaned forward to kiss the tip of her nose, than her cheek, and then finally her warm lips. I heard her heart stutter.

I drew back a moment later and watched her scramble for her thoughts, her cheeks a scarlet red. I grinned.

"I..." she drew in a deep, shaky breath and eyed me. "I think I'm going to get breakfast now." She wobbled slightly when she stood, but managed not to fall over. I stood as well and followed suit as she made her way down the staircase. I watched as she ran a hand through her long, dark hair and contemplated on what to eat. She decided on her usual-cereal.

"I'll get it for you," I offered; she still looked a little off-balance and I was worried she would hurt herself somehow. As outrageous as that sounded-I knew Bella-I knew how she was able to find danger in even the most simple of tasks.

Bella shook her head, "I can get it," she protested, reaching up for a ceramic bowl.

"No really, I want to get it for you." I pulled out the chair I usually sat in and gestured for her to sit. She gave in and dropped into the awaited chair, her large eyes bright with curiosity as she watched me.

When I set the bowl and spoon down in front of her with a grin of triumph, she looked disappointed. "To be honest, I didn't think you could do it," she confessed; I could tell she had really hoped that I wouldn't have been able to do it.

"Silly, Bella," I teased and ruffled her already messy hair. "I've watched you make a bowl of cereal for over two years now; I'm not_ that_ oblivious."

"No," she muttered, lifting her spoon for a bite. I snickered at the look on her face. For a couple minutes, we sat in silence.

She spoke: "You said she was starved," Bella cocked her head at me. "Why?"

I leaned back in my chair, thinking about how to answer that. "To be entirely honest, I'm not sure. Carlisle said that sometimes, when a vampire is created...especially if they were converted young...sometimes their instincts don't kick in."

Bella contemplated about that. "Why?"

I shook my head. "I don't know."

"Maybe the vampire that had bit her left her almost completely drained, but not enough so that the venom would kill her. Maybe that would have something to do with it." She took another bite of her cereal.

I looked at her, amazed. I grinned.

"What?" she asked, looking puzzled.

I just shook my head again, "Carlisle would be interested in that theory."

Bella '_humphed_' and resumed eating. I continued to grin despite of myself. She was absolutely mystifying. Again we sat in silence. I watched her, pulling together a question that I had been meaning to ask her for sometime.

"So," I said casually as she ate. "Christmas is coming up. Anything particular you have in mind?" It's you last Christmas as a human, you know. I continued mentally with a pang of sadness.

"Christmas isn't for another couple months?" her entire face twisted in annoyance. "Why?"

I narrowed my eyes at her sudden attitude. "Usually people give each other gifts during Christmas." I said in a calculating voice. Here we go.

Bella screwed up her mouth, "But I'm not going to be human then-why bother with Christmas when we have to deal with other things?"

I looked away instantly, clenching my jaw to keep from saying anything I would regret later. "You know," I said softly, pleadingly, "You can wait until after Christmas."

I heard her slam her spoon down and I turned back to see her glowering at me. "Edward," she spat with such intensity that it startled me. "We made a deal that I expect you to go through on."

I instantly got defensive. "It was only a suggestion, Bella." I said, letting my voice raise slightly.

Bella's face turned so red it was almost purple. I felt uneasy...maybe I had taken it too far this time. "What if I did wait for Christmas? What then?"

I saw this as a hopeful sign. "Then you would be able to enjoy another human experience."

"And after Christmas?" she raised her eyebrows, rage still underlying in her words.

"Then you can have your way."

"No!" she burst out making me lean back slightly. Never mind about the hopefulness. "You would then try to convince me to wait until Easter...than Halloween...then Thanksgiving and then here we are back at Christmas again!" She snatched up her spoon again.

I realized she was right. I gave her a meek expression and waited for her fuming to simmer out. After she had calmed slightly I leaned towards her, staring into her eyes. "How about hypothetically speaking-what would you like then?"

For a moment I thought she was going to go off on me again. But she didn't.

Her spoon froze halfway to her mouth, dripping with milk; she looked at me suspiciously obviously wondering whether to yell at me again. But then that look vanished and she lowered the spoon, averting her eyes from mine. "Well, actually," Bella began nervously. "There was something..." her voice trailed off.

I perked up instantly. Well, this was new. Never before had she given in so easily for a gift arrangement. I felt excited and willing to grant any wish she might have. I waited, leaning forward on the edge of my seat in anticipation.

She sighed. "Never mind."

My stomach dropped and I glared at her resentfully. Why does she do that? "Bella, you are truly absurd." At that statement, she looked as though she would stick her tongue at me. Playfully, I wagged a finger at her face. "Tell me now, or I'll resort to forcing it out of you."

Her eyes widened slightly, but then she saw the humor in my eyes and relaxed; absentmindedly, she started to play with her spoon, swirling it around in her cereal. "Well...to be totally honest..." she stopped then and looked at me, chewing her lip hesitantly. For a second, I wanted to dramatically throw myself on the floor or something. She was driving me insane! But, then again, that was Bella, and that was why I loved her so much-no matter how frustrating it can get.

She blushed when she realized what I was thinking and smiled sheepishly, her chocolate eyes apologetic. "I wanted a camera."

I blinked in surprise. "But you already have a camera."

Her blush turned even redder and spread to her neck. She ducked her head. She was even more adorable when she did that and even more frustrating. "I mean a video camera-to record things...you know..." Bella's eyes darted to me then away.

I raised my eyebrows and stared at her. "That's all?"

This time she met my gaze, her chin slightly raised. "If you don't mind-you don't have to get me anything if you don't want to-it's just a suggestion..."

I sighed and shook my head to stop her from saying anything else. "It would be my pleasure," I flashed her a smile and she seemed content with that. When she finished her cereal-which hadn't looked very appetizing-she stood and washed her dishes quickly.

"I'm going to take a shower real quick," she looked sternly at me, her eyebrows puckered. "You stay."

I gave her a mock salute and froze like a stone. She shook her head at me and turned, making her way towards the stairs. She paused, though, at the threshold of the kitchen and turned shyly to look at me.

"Thanks for breakfast." She smiled, her eyes turning into crescent moons.

"You're welcome."

She jogged up the staircase and I heard her rummaging through her room and then walking towards the bathroom. The door shut with a soft click and there was a spray of water as turned the shower on. For a moment, there was nothing else.

It was then, that a long, piercing scream spilt the peacefulness in half, followed by a loud crash and the shattering of glass. I was like lightening; shooting up the staircase and bursting through the doorway, fear like a monster clawing in my chest.

"OH MY GOD, EDWARD!" Bella shrieked as she frantically tried to cover herself. I froze in shock, my mouth dropping open. If I could blush, my entire face would have been on fire. "SHUT THE DOOR-" she cried, "SHUT THE DAMN DOOR!

I slammed the bathroom door shut, gasping in embarrassment. I stood rigid for a moment in an effort to gather my senses than swallowed hard and turned back to the door. I leaned my head against the bathroom door. She was crying on the other side

"Bella," I called gently, feebly, feeling horrible. "I'm so sorry...I swear I didn't know...I heard you scream...it was instinct...I really wasn't thinking...honest."

I heard her sniffle but received no answer. The feeling of stupidity sank even deeper. "Are you alright? Can I come in?"

She didn't answer. I felt nervous as I waited for her to speak. "Bella...are you alright? Can I come in now?" this time she answered.

She still didn't answer; even through the wooden door I could hear her heart pumping spastically in her chest. A tingling sense of panic sparked up my spine. Slowly, cautiously, I let the door creak open. It was then that I smelled the potency of her fresh blood-so much stronger than usual...I had been so used to being immune to the overwhelming smell that for a moment I hadn't noticed.

She was on the floor, weakly struggling to prop herself up. And it was then that I saw it-thin lines of crimson, dark and red, streaking from a gash in her neck and staining the shoulder of her shirt. The window above was shattered with only a few stray pieces still jutting out of the frame. I swallowed hard, panic rushing through my body as I stared at her. The hint of panic morphed into terror.

"Bella, love, what happened?" I gasped huskily, fighting to keep my emotions in check. I knelt down slowly, ripping a towel from a nearby hook and using it to staunch the blood gushing from her spilt forehead. "How did you get hurt?"

Bella was shaking so badly, she couldn't even hold her head right. She looked at me with widened eyes her lips moving as she attempted to speak. It scared me the way she was breathing so hard and so fast.

"Bella?" I tried to push back the fearful edge creeping into my voice. "Bella, calm down-you need to calm down-"

"In-the-window-" she sobbed almost unintelligibly, clinging to me like a floundering child. "There-was-something-it-was-looking-at-me-"

My body tensed like a wire, I pulled Bella into my arms protectively and my eyes snapped up, scanning the room and not recognizing the scent wafting in from the broken window.

It wasn't vampire. It wasn't werewolf. But it was definitely not human.


	2. Chapter 2

This chapter was so hard to write and I have no idea why. The ending is slightly confusing and I think I might have kinda went off character with Edward, but...overall, _I _like it. The title is a bit off though...couldn't really think of anything else.

Dark storm clouds were building thickly along the pale horizon. The sun was desperately trying to reach past the growing darkness but with little success. The wind had grown almost violent; brightly colored leafs tumbled across the empty road, swirling in rapid circles and slapping erratically against the windshield. The hair on the back of my neck stood on end. This was definitely going to be a big one.

Bella sat dead silent in the passenger seat (no pun intended), her head leaning against the window, her breathing shallow and her eyes vacant. The blood on her neck had dried to a brown crust, revealing the ugly gash etched into it. The slice on her forehead hadn't stopped bleeding; though, it was only trickling red line now. The towel she had pressed to her neck now lay limp in her lap, stained dark with crimson. I looked down at my own shirt and saw it streaked with red; I would have to get rid of it when I got home. I swallowed hard at the rush of venom in the back of my throat and stared fixedly on the road, holding my breath. The closeness of the car and the heat the vents spewed out intensified the perfume of her blood until my stomach cramped up with longing. But I had grown immune to it-not the smell, but the need to feed and in that, I found great relief. I could resist without struggle, but I couldn't hold back the instinctive flood of venom.

My entire body ached to touch her, to hold her, to let her know that she was safe with me, despite everything else. But I was afraid-I grimaced at that thought-I was afraid that a gentle touch from my icy fingers would, somehow, push her to the breaking point. Whatever she had seen, whatever had been in that cursed window, she did not want to share with me and that made me feel shamed.

My face darkened, though I tried to will it not to, at that thought and I glared at the pavement flying past, clenching my teeth in controlled rage. The fact that someone had been at Bella's window intending to harm her made me absolutely furious, completely livid...but even more so, was the fury of not being able to recognize the scent splashed across the windowsill. It was not vampire, not werewolf, nor was it human-I didn't know what it was and that was the unnerving part of it. I sped the truck forward and the engine whined from the strain; I silently cursed it. The moment Bella is converted I'm buying her a new car, no matter what she says or what she does.

Next to me, Bella shifted and I turned a fraction of an inch to look at her. Her skin had a gray tinge to it and a sheen of sweat glazed her face. Her eyes were closed now and, with a spark of fear, I thought she had fainted.

"Bella," I said in a raspy voice, turning my head to fully look at her, my hands clenching the steering wheel tightly.

Relief filled me when she responded to my voice by opening her eyes and looking at me.

"Edward?" she spoke in a trembling voice barely above a whisper-so soft that it wouldn't have been able to reach human ears.

My insides lurched. "Yes," I asked softly, watching her anxiously. Her large, chocolate eyes were wide behind wisps of dark hair-a stark contrast to her ivory skin. To my horror, her lip began to quiver and I saw tears sparkle like tiny diamonds in her beautiful eyes.

She didn't say anything, letting her head fall back against the glass pane, her eyes growing distant once more.

I was terrified now. I had never seen her in such a lethargic state before and it took every part of my being to control the wild instincts pulsing through me. I snapped my head back to the road, my eyes unblinking, trying to press the truck to go even faster as I sped through a stop sign and across a barren intersection. The houses were waning fast and the trees were thickening along the side of the road. We were soon going to be coming up upon my driveway.

Out of reflex I reached for my phone in the pocket of my jeans but the bulge when the phone should have been wasn't there.

"_Damn_!" I hissed aloud, realizing I must have left it at Bella's house in the bathroom. I went back to clenching the steering wheel, scowling darkly at the road in front of me. The clouds above looked ominous, threatening. A tiny drop of rain splattered on the windshield and other, much larger raindrops soon followed it and I flicked on the windshield wipers. A brilliant vein of lightening jaggedly split across the clouds and a rumble of thunder rolled down from the mountains. With that, the sun made its final curtain call and disappeared behind a blanket of dark gray, letting the rain above spill down in disarray. It was as if the heavens above have ripped open with a roar of thunder and let loose a torrent of a thousand unshed tears, flooding the earth below with its sadness.

I twisted the knob of the heater on high and the vents let out a blast of hot air. I didn't need it but Bella definitely would. There was another crack of thunder as a streak of lightening whip lashed down towards earth and Bella's body jolted, startled by the sudden loud noise. The air was sizzling with electricity and I could feel the buzz even inside the car. I reached across the consol and laid a hand on her arm, wanting the feel the warmth of her blood coursing under her skin. She felt cold-even to me, not the usual warmth that usually emitted from her body. She shivered at my touch and I quickly drew back, unsure of what to do.

Come on, come on...faster, faster you stupid truck!

A dark shadow, darker than the clouds looming above, flitted through my peripheral vision. A strange, burning scent wafted through the car and my instincts flared wildly out of control. Panic exploded in my head at the same time the animosity branched out like poison in my stomach. There was something out there. Something dangerous. Something coming after us.

Out of pure reflex, my foot slammed the brakes and the truck let out a high-pitched squeal. Bella was thrown forward in her seat belt at the same time I heard the shattering of glass and shards flew, one piece spearing my arm painlessly. I lurched across the seat as the car spun a wild three-sixty, my arms enclosing protectively around Bella's fragile body. Her ear-splitting screams of terror and confusion grated over my nerves, sending them haywire. The door ripped from its hinges and Bella's buckle snapped from my force of impact and we both flew out the door and hit the pavement; her head cracked against the moving asphalt and her screams stopped abruptly. The truck wheeled out of control and flipped on the shoulder of the country road with a horrible sound of crunching metal and popping glass. A random memory was flung across my mind as I thought of something similar that had happened that fateful day only a couple years ago that sent both of us spiraling into a future that was unknown. But I didn't have time to think about it much because my instincts were still screaming at me. We rolled several times before stopping with me on top of her. I pushed my weight off her motionless body and I sprang lithely to my feet, a savage snarl ripping from my throat. I crouched low over Bella, my eyes darting to pick out an object in the blinding sheet of rain. The burning stench was still there, more putrid than that of a werewolf; it made me sick.

Desperately I reached out my thoughts but only met a brick wall of resistance that nearly had me falling backwards. A flailing body flew at me and we crashed with the sound of colliding boulders. My attacker let out a shrill scream of fury when I reflexively sank my teeth into whatever was pinning me, giving me a brief chance to tear free. We became a blur in the rain rolling around violently, breaking apart for a second only to fly at each other again. My opponent was fast and strong and I had the disadvantage of not being able to hear its thoughts. I bit whenever I could, tore at whatever I could reach, did whatever I could do to keep the distance from Bella. We ended up in the muddy grass-water flew as we hit the ground in a chaotic frenzy. I could feel the slimy mud ooze thickly down my shirt and slick up my arms.

Then we broke out of formation, panting, growling, and snapping like crazed animals. I bared my teeth and hissed warningly and we circled each other, feinting sporadically, neither one of us willing to leap into action just yet. A sudden flash of lightening illuminated the field and I caught a brief glimpse of my opponent.

Brief...but it was enough to send a chill snaking down my spine. I found myself staring into pitiless black eyes and papery skin. It was tall but lanky-I could see his, or its, ribs-its entire skeleton forming knobby ridges under its skin, showing through the thin layer of clothes. Its lips curled over a row of pointed teeth and a malicious hiss rolled from its tongue. The creature looked like a vampire in a way but its putrid smell strung my senses out in an alarming fashion.

This couldn't be any vampire.

It rushed me shrieking like an demon out of hell, arms extended and hands curled like claws. Though I could not hear its thoughts, I could see its intentions and I crouched low, tensing my muscles. I sidestepped at the last second and twisted to catch its arm in an iron grasp. I threw it forward, my hands clenching around its boney neck, preparing to snap off its head.

Pain-horrible, agonizing pain seemed to bisect my skull. I gasped, releasing the creature as though it had shocked me, and sagged, landing in a heap in the mud. I tried to raise my head, tried to move towards Bella's vulnerable body but the pain pinned me down. I reached out in blind panic; I tried to push back the agony setting my veins on fire...this was worse than anything I had ever felt before-worse than Jane's sickly gift, worse than my transformation. Though I had no need for oxygen, I felt as though I was being suffocated-like a pillow was being shoved against my face. White strobes of light exploded in my vision and the earth below me swayed and lurched. Then the darkness crept from the edges of my vision and I could feel my mind slipping into a black hole-something that hadn't happened for a long, long time.

And then there was no more.

****

My eyes snapped open the exact time a roar of thunder rendered the blackened sky. For a moment I stared blankly, confusedly at the clouds above, unfeeling to the icy rain pelting my face. I couldn't remember where I was, how I had got there, and why I was lying on the ground. My head, or more specific, my mind felt disconnected with reality, with lucid thoughts. The things that flitted through my brain were mindless, random and confusing. I watched with incomprehension as the clouds began to rotate slowly in place.

A vivid flash of lightening spilt through the thick atmosphere echoed by a growl of low thunder. Like someone had switched the on button, my head instantly cleared and for a moment I could think with some clarity.

I sat up instantly, quickly, provoked by a spasm of panic and fear. I lurched unsteadily to my feet and suddenly found myself staggering drunkenly to the side. My head felt light and I felt strangely detached from my body, like I was some how watching myself from a distance, from a place out of my being. I shook my head, grasping a nearby limb for support.

Bella. If there was a god, please let her be alive, please let her be okay...I begged silently, wildly.

A siren blared in my head at my angel's name and I stumbled forward blindly, searching to catch her scent laced in the wind. It took only seconds to find her perfume tangled within the air and I followed her scent, faltering slightly as I ran doggedly towards the smell. The smell of burning rubber and leaking gas also wafted up my nose and I saw a whiff of gray smoke spiraling in the air. With that thought, my mind grew incoherent again and agitated panic flooded me as I tried to remember just what I was looking for. Beneath me, the wet, soggy ground swayed and lurched like the deck of a ship caught in a violent swell. I felt like a human who had just gotten off a four-hour ride on one of those spinning tops at the fairs and a very humanely feeling of nausea curdled my gut. I doubled over, gasping, watching as the mud blurred in my vision.

Wait. I demanded myself. Just think straight...Bella...I have to find Bella...I could smell her only yards away. I charged forward, running at a slight angle. Whatever that-that thing had done to me I didn't like it one bit. It left me feeling vulnerable and weak...not something that was easily accomplished. Things like this weren't supposed to happen. I felt too...too _human. _I shuddered.

Then I saw her, lying in a heap in the middle of the country road and I sank helplessly to my knees, still praying pleadingly in my head. The rain shattered when it hit the asphalt; it streaked down my face, washing away the mud and dripped from the tip of my nose and chin. The water had flooded the pavement up to my wrists as I slowly, achingly pulled myself in a crawl across the pitted road.

Bella lay motionless, her dark hair splayed out like a fan around her head. I reached her side and my body sagged down on one elbow, drained of my seemingly never-ending endurance. Tiny pools of rainwater had formed over her closed eyelids, overfilling and sprinting down the sides of her face in erratic patterns. Her lips were white and closed and tiny droplets of rain dribbled from a corner of her mouth.

"Bella..." I rasped weakly but received no response, only the faint rise and fall of her chest as she breathed. She looked like a rag doll-lifeless and empty; her white skin was a stark background to her hair. I used my other arm and braced it on the other side of her body, trying my best to shield her from the pounding, relentless rain. I had to get her out of this before her condition worsened. She was ill-I could see by the way her blood pulsed weakly through the thin, blue-green veins branching up her neck and the way her breathing came rapid and shallow. And her smell-it was tinged with a hint of bile.

There was no way I would be able to carry her safely through this, not the way I was feeling. Already I could feel my mind slipping again, haphazard memories stringing themselves through my head. It was like being in a dream, a nightmare where time seemed to collapse in on itself; where things seem to move in slow motion and then jerk forward at break-neck speed; where entire events seem to be ripped from existence, leaving ragged-edged fragments of memory or simply fleeting impressions strung together between the gaps. For a confusing moment I could see my mother's face piecing itself together in my head-this, throwing my internal system even more off balance bewildered me. I wondered if this is what if felt like for Bella after on of _her _nightmares. Angry with myself, I forced myself to rise to my feet, willingly to do anything at this point.

The moment I locked my knees, though, a dull, numb feeling birthed in my chest and I sank back down, groaning in defeat. I was feeling disconnected again, unable to grasp the situation I was facing. For a moment, all I could do was be still as stone on hands and knees, my head hanging. How _weak _I felt, how _vulnerable _I felt. It was disgusting. My thoughts were distorted as though someone had taken a wire whisk and scrambled them like eggs...I blinked once and looked around lazily. I had forgotten again-forgotten why I kneeling next to Bella...

Bella's body, still inert on the ground, brought it back and I shook my head free of the tangled cobwebs. I have to be strong for Bella. I _cannot _and _will not _be weak! But mind over matter was no longer an option at this point. Matter was definitely winning over mind. My resolve was weakening by the second, despite the will to find shelter for Bella. My head felt too heavy and the ground couldn't see to stop pitching beneath me.

My arms folded in on themselves and I sank to the wet earth and pressed my cheek against the rough ground, the feel of the rainwater streaming against my skin was almost soothing. Distantly, I thought I heard the shrill ringing of a cell phone and I could feel a vibration coming from Bella's jacket pocket. I stared unseeingly at the side of Bella's face, breathing slowly and evenly and, with my hand holding Bella's, I let myself drift to a place where reality seemed to melt away and nothing but surreal worlds existed.

******

"He looks like he's dead," a voice, familiar and soft, floated into the fog than out again.

"Well, technically, he is dead," another voice, familiar as well, came in; clouding out the darkness I had been drifting in.

It was then that I realized that I could feel no rain pounding against my skin, nor the feel of Bella's warm hand curled in mine. There was only soft carpet pressing under me and the inside of my eyelids glowed red from a bright light above me.

"Good thing you found them, Alice or the paramedics would have pronounced him dead on sight-you know, with no vital signs at all," said the second voice, seeming amused at the idea.

"Did he faint?" it was a different voice this time, male.

"Vampire's can't faint," scoffed the first voice.

"Quiet down, please," a new voice, soft and gentle, broke in. A hand fell lightly upon my brow than something was peeling back my eyelid.

I shook the hand away with a twist of my head, but my eyes remained closed, unwilling to let the oblivion fully pass.

"Well, at least his personality still intact,"

I opened my eyes at that comment to find Carlisle crouching over me. For a moment, I couldn't recognize where I was. I saw relief fill his face than concern. _Edward, what's wrong with your eyes?_

"We thought you were dead," Emmett mourned from above Carlisle, a mockingly sad look on his face. Beside him, Rosalie rolled her eyes towards the ceiling. But Emmett leaned in closer, his eyes narrowing.

"Hey, what's with his eyes?" he asked, flabbergasted.

"I'm...fine..." I mumbled faintly, pushing myself into a sitting position then, finding that it sent my head whirling, lay back down again. "Where's...Bella?"

Carlisle bent closer towards me, peeling back my eyelid even more than it already was. I cringed.

"Carlisle, I'm...not your patient..." I grumbled moodily, pushing his hand away once more. "Where's Bella?"

"You sound drunk, Edward," Alice pointed out. She was kneeling in front of my head, her eyebrows furrowed. "Why are his eyes like that, Carlisle?"

I snarled viciously, forcing my body to roll into a sitting position, ignoring my head's protests. "Where's Bel-"

There she was, my little angel, sitting on the couch with a blanket drawn up to her mouth. Her eyes were wide as she peered at me over the top of the wool blanket. The right side of her forehead supported a small, white bandage. "Bella..."

"Lay down!" Carlisle demanded, pushing me back to the carpet. "You look as disoriented as a penguin would be in Africa, now _lay down!" Edward. Your eyes are as white as your skin._

Automatically I reached up a hand to my face, as though that would have done me any good. "Wha-"

Alice's hand clamped over my mouth, preventing any further speech. I glared at her savagely. What were they doing to me?! _Edward, just please cooperate for a moment please. We found you and Bella in the middle of the road. The truck was pulverized and you looked as though someone had hit you on the head with a boulder. You were mumbling to yourself and when Carlisle tried to help you to walk, you just kind of hung there. Just try to lie still until we can find some sort of solution. You had Carlisle almost out of his mind with worry._

I relaxed my glare and she removed her hand with a look of triumph. But I soon forgot my deal when I caught of whiff of Bella's scent wafting up my nose. I sat up again and three pairs of hands forced me down again. "Is Bella alright," I hurled out at them on my way back down, struggling to crane my neck for another glimpse of her.

"She is going to be fine, Edward," Carlisle soothed gently, placing a hand on my shoulder. "A mild concussion and a couple stitches and a slight shock but she is perfectly fine-though worried about you."

"That's...that's...ridiculous," I sputtered furiously though my rage sounded quite pitiful, "I'm fine, I really am-"

This time it was Jasper who pressed a firm hand over my mouth. "I know what you feel like right now and, if I were you, I wouldn't move much."

I closed my eyes in defeat, trying to ignore the fact that my entire family was sitting there staring at me. I was feeling a lot more lucid though despite my mind still slightly numb.

"Maybe it was a talent the other vampire had," Alice's voice suddenly suggested. "Maybe he was able to drain strength or confuse the mind or something to that effect."

"You could be right," Carlisle contemplated slowly.

My eyes flew open. "That...was...no vampire..." I said faintly, feeling sick again at the thought.

Carlisle blinked and he leaned closer once more, his forehead creased. "What?"

"That...that thing that attacked...me and Bella...it wasn't a vampire...at all..." I struggled to talk intelligibly.

"What did it look like," he was persistent.

I thought hard but couldn't seem to drudge up a mental picture of the attacker. "I don't...remember," I admitted shamefully. Carlisle turned away from me.

"Bella?" he asked in gentle, calm voice, "Bella, you saw it, didn't you? Do you remember what it looked like?"

I heard Bella's breathing quicken and I tensed against the hands that held me down. I tilted my chin back as far as it would go, straining to see my angel's face. But I couldn't see anything beyond Carlisle.

"It looked..." she hesitated, her voice sounded small and weak. My entire being went out to her, longing to hold her in my arms. "Like, well, like...a _monster,"_

"Tuh," Emmett huffed, "That really helps, Bella."

I was about to defend her but Bella was faster this time.

"That's not what I mean...it didn't have any eyes but I knew it could see me...and its teeth were pointed..." her voice faded and I could almost hear her shudder from fear. Alice stood and moved towards her lovingly.

"It's alright, Bella," she said. "Everything is going to be just fine."

"Almost sounds like a mutated vampire," Emmett commented offhand and everyone was suddenly silent. "But...that couldn't happen...could it?"

"It was a demon from hell," I decided gruffly, scowling up at the ceiling. This was not some sort of idiotic science fiction movie where green boogey men mutate from green puddles of ooze.

I saw a slight smile press at Carlisle's lips, as though he could almost guess what I was thinking, but he turned back towards Bella. "Is that all?"

"Yes; he disappeared when...Edward ran in," I knew she had blushed as she said this. "I was too scared to notice anything else."

"Where's Addy?" I asked, noticing that our newest addition was not present.

"She went hunting with Esme and Rosalie," Jasper explained for me. "We wanted to keep her away from the house for awhile...you know..." _Bella. You know, your eyes look a bit darker._

I grimaced.

"Maybe we should call Denali, see if they've had any sightings-"

I couldn't stop the moan, low and unearthly, from breaking from my throat. It suddenly felt as though something was compressing my head and I rolled to the side, clutching my head between both hands, attempting to push back the feeling. My breath escaped as a hiss of pain.

"Edward!" Carlisle was wrenching my hands from my face but that didn't stop the numbing dead feeling spreading through my limbs.

The feeling quickly passed though, "I'm...alright...it's gone..."

"Carlisle, you have to do something!" Bella cried out frantically.

Carlisle did not respond for a moment, he just kept looking at me, his eyes tight and worried.

"I'm...fine..." I said again spoke in a weak, hoarse voice, not convincing anyone. If I hadn't felt so horrible, I would have been extremely embarrassed. Carlisle was holding my face in his hands, talking to me gently, coaxingly.

I shook my head free, breathing ragged, cursing that thing to the deepest pit of hell. I clenched my eyes shut and searched for something to distract them, "I couldn't hear its thoughts," I said through gritted teeth.

Carlisle drew his hands away only to rest them on my shoulders. He looked surprised. "Really?"

"And, well, obviously I didn't see any of this happen," Alice confessed, sounding horrified of herself. She continued: "Carlisle told me you couldn't hear Addy's thoughts, either. " an unclear idea was forming in her head.

"Yeah," I huffed, feeling slightly defensive and slightly confused, yet, feeling more normal by the second. Carlisle's eyes darted from my face to Alice's on the couch back to my face. _What is she getting at?_

"Yeah," she repeated hesitantly, "And well, the truth is I never saw anything about her future either." She hesitated again, looking to Jasper for support. I reached out to touch her mind but stopped when I heard her singing _The Battle Hymn of the Republic._ "Its kind of like the thing that attacked you. You couldn't hear any of its thoughts and I," she made a disgusted face. "I, couldn't see any future. And, Jasper...he said he couldn't feel Addy's emotions.

"Its like...its like she doesn't have a real future...or a real emotion..." her voice trailed off and she paused for a moment before continuing. "And that thing out there-maybe he is devoid of actual thoughts-only driven by instinct. Its like...it's like..." I finished the thought for her, my mouth forming a thin, grim line

"It's like it doesn't really exist. Like Addy had never really existed."


	3. Chapter 3

She was like a curious kitten with large, interested eyes. Her dark pupils were contracted in the yellow light of the lamp, accentuating the bloody redness of her irises. She sat cross-legged on the white carpeted floor, hands in her lap, and alert eyes watching me carefully. A light blue tee shirt hung over her excessively thin frame and she wore khaki shorts that looked like it used to belong to Alice when she had been in her tomboy mode. The room was silent, void of any interaction. I had gained most of my strength back and a lot of grumpiness. I didn't want to be the babysitter but Carlisle and Esme had insisted and who was I to decline so rudely?

I reclined on the couch, with arms crossed and a moody expression. I watched her through narrowed slits as she stared at me openly. Finally, I couldn't take it any more: "Why are you staring at me?" I grinded between clenched teeth, staring condescendingly down at her while she picked at frayed strands of the carpet.

Addy cocked her head; her dark curls bobbing with the movement. "Why not?"

"Because it is very rude." I snapped back, letting my head fall back against the cushion of the couch. I stared at the erratic patterns in the ceiling and I began to count the tiny cracks etched into the plaster.

"Rude?" she asked, undeterred by my attitude and lack of kindness. I averted my eyes from the ceiling and glowered at her again.

"Yes, _rude_,"

"Why?"

"_Why_?" I echoed with a sigh of frustration, squeezing my eyes shut tightly. "Because," I answered in a whisper, hoping the annoying newborn would take a hint and beat it.

Addy was silent for a couple moments as she contemplated this and for a brief second I thought I had gotten her to leave me alone. I let out a sigh of relief and content when she said nothing else. But when I opened my eyes, I jumped slightly. Her freckled face was only inches away from mine so that the tips of our noses almost touched. Her face looked concentrated. "Because why?"

I put a hand on her face, my fingers splaying over her cheeks, covering her mouth and nose with my palm and gently, but firmly, gave me some distance. "Because it just is," I repeated gruffly.

"I don't understand," Addy had raised her voice slightly so that it just barely echoed off the living room walls. "_Why?_"

"_Because._"

Her eyebrows furrowed and she scrunched her nose at me in the most ridiculous fashion. "Well, _why_ is it _because_?" she asked loudly, determined to receive a straight answer.

I let a low growl rumble deep in my chest; I was feeling exceptionally aggravated, "Because it can make others feel _uncomfortable_." I said with a nasty glare, clenching my teeth when I said the word _uncomfortable._

Addy fell back on her haunches, stumped by my answer. Relieved once again, I closed my eyes, stretching out my legs to their full extent.

"Un-com-fort-able?" she enunciated the word with precise carefulness, breaking through the deep silence once more.

I grunted but offered no reply.

Suddenly, I felt weight on both my legs and my eyes flashed open. Addy had both hands on my ankles and she looked up at me with an intense perplexity. "But _why_?"

I clenched my fists tightly to keep from ripping out my hair and stood stiffly, snarling at her before stalking out. They had left me here alone with her, the traitors. _I needed my rest. I needed to relax. _I let out a dark chuckle as I stomped my way to the kitchen. To hell with that. I wanted to be with Bella. I didn't need to rest like one of Carlisle's hospital patients who had drank too much and had a serious hang over the next day.

We, meaning Bella and I, had both received several hours of recovering until Carlisle had randomly announced that the storm was getting worse and Bella had to get back to Charlie for he was likely to panic because the phone lines were down, disabling any phone communication. At least the ones with wires. Our cell phones worked perfectly fine but of course, Bella's father felt no need to stay with the twenty-first century.

Of course, the moment they left the storm settled until there was almost sunlight splitting through the clouds. Alice said it was only the deep breath before the storm. I scoffed at that, though knew I shouldn't doubt Alice when it came to her visions that dealt with the weather.

Just then, my tiny phone buzzed and I felt a slight vibration in my pocket. I flashed it to my ear. "Hello?" I answered anxiously. Over the phone, I couldn't hear anyone's thoughts, which bothered me immensely.

"Edward," Alice breathed. Her soft words sounded as though they were edged with suppressed tension.

"Alice what's wrong?" I asked raggedly, alarmed, turning my heel to head for the front door. I was ready to bolt to them at the first word of trouble, Addy or no Addy.

On the other side of the line, Alice giggled slightly. "Nothing really."

"Really?" I asked sourly in a sarcastic voice. "Is Bella alright?"

"Actually, we're bringing her back."

I perked up at the news. At least I'll have something to look forward to today.

She continued: "It seems that Charlie is stuck in La Push and all power is out at their house. So we grabbed her some fresh clothes… that reminds me…I have to take Addy shopping for some real clothes; she looks so degraded in the ones that Esme let her borrow. Don't let me forget, okay?"

"Humph." Was all I gave her.

"What? Are you two alright?" her voice immediately grew serious. She waited as I paused, wondering how I should answer the question she offered. I headed back to the living room, hearing the buzz of the television.

"Just that she's driving me insane! She never stops asking questions—" I stopped when I rounded the corner. Addy was perched on the sofa, her whole body leaning forward until she was balancing precariously on the cushions. She stared unblinkingly at the TV screen, her hands clasped together. For a moment I didn't move, lowering my voice even more. "Is that normal? You know I don't remember Rosalie or Emmett asking so many idiotic questions."

"I hope your not overreacting, Edward." Alice snorted on the other side of the line. "What, do you have some law against asking questions? Maybe you should slap Bella next time she asks a stupid question."

I heard a faint '_what_?' in the background that sounded a lot like Bella's indignant voice. A smile pressed on the corners of my mouth., dimming the sudden defensiveness that welled up in me.

"Are you trying to imply that—" I spun back around and gasped, the phone dropping from my fingers.

Addy was standing there, staring at me with that familiar cocked head. She raised her right hand and there, cradled in her palm, was the cell phone. "Edward?" the cell phone squawked at me. "Edward? Are you still there? Edward?"

Slowly, cautiously, I plucked the tiny phone from Addy's palm. I raised it back to my ear. "Hello?" I croaked, still staring wide-eyed at the newborn. She stared back at me, her bloody red eyes reflecting the faint break of light bouncing in from the window. Her gaze was unwavering and almost unnerving.

"Did you just hang up on me?" Alice stipulated when I put the phone back to my ear, sounding completely incredulous.

"No." I answered softly, slowly with a slight apprehension. I began edging my way around Addy and, then, loping my way back towards the stairs. I was seeking the solitude of my bedroom and the pounding of music reverberating off the walls.

For a couple seconds Alice was silent, "are you alright?" she asked finally, sounding worried for the first time.

"I'm fine," I glanced back at Addy and found she was still standing on the threshold, watching me retreat. She didn't seem to have moved. "What about Bella? Is she going to be alright?"

The light humor returned to my sister's voice. "She's perfectly fine—even Carlisle said so. See…tell him Carlisle…"

I heard a sudden shift and heard Carlisle say from a slight distance. "She's fine, Edward."

I rolled my eyes, and started to speak in a sarcastic tone: "Why, thanks Alice—" I gasped again, but this time managing to hang on to the phone. Addy was in front of me, standing on the first step, which I was about to mount. "Alice, just hold one damn second."

"Wha—?"

I lowered the phone and covered the mouthpiece, glaring at the young, vampire girl. "Stop it!" I hissed through gritted teeth, straining to keep my voice low so not to cause any alarm on Alice's part.

Addy blinked and her forehead creased slightly. "Stop what?" she asked innocently, looking confused.

"_Freaking me out_!"

She blinked but didn't say anything else, her confusion seemed to have doubled. I brought the phone back to my ear, giving her a frigid stare that was enough to freeze any regular human, though it didn't seem to have any effect on the small newborn. "Alice, I have to go. I'll see you in a bit."

"Edward, but wait—"

I hung up on her and pocketed the phone. "You," I accused with a pointed finger. The tiny vampire flinched slightly. "Stop following me. Go watch TV or something."

"Why?" she sputtered, stomping her foot on the wooden step. "What did I do?"

I turned on my heel and stalked out of the room, feeling Addy's bewildered eyes follow me, even when I was out of sight. I have to call Carlisle now, he needed to know we were housing a pixie from hell.

And there she was, sending another jolt of unease through my veins, standing in the middle of the kitchen. Brilliant beams of sunlight burst through the line of windows, dancing across her wild curls and shattering against her skin, throwing rainbows across the ceramic tiling. Her lips parted slightly, like she meant to speak but I cut her off angrily.

I snarled viciously, "I told you to leave me alone!" I shouted, not even bothering to keep my voice low. "How do you keep doing that? _Why _do you keep doing that?!"

Addy blinked once, her eyes wide with no hint of comprehension. She stared at me as though waiting for me to say something else, pressing her lips into a thin, stubborn line.

And I did: "What did I just tell you—you…exasperating girl! GO!"

She still didn't move. Her eyebrow furrowed ever so slightly. She even tightened her eyes slightly; I could see that I was upsetting her but I didn't care.

"Do I have to spell it out for you? Go-a-way!"

Addy cocked her head, "Why?"

"That's does it," I marched over to her tiny form, scooped her up and tucked her under my left arm. That word was now a curse in my vocabulary. For a moment she tried to wiggle free but was unsuccessful. "You are going to watch television and you are going to let me have some peace."

"Jasper?" she asked, ignoring me completely and insultingly.

"No, I'm Edward." I corrected hotly. I was definitely _not _Jasper.

"Edward," she began as her thin, dangling arms swung slightly while I carried her swiftly back to the living room. "Where are you from?"

"Hell," I hissed, striding unrelentingly to the couch.

"What's that?"

I planted her firmly in the middle of the couch, blowing off her ridiculous question, and flipped on the screen, revealing the five o'clock news. "Now _STAY_!"

She opened her mouth to speak once more.

"Because I said so!" I spoke before she was even able to speak. I may not be able to read her mind, but I was definitely able to predict what she was going to say.

I slouched back to the kitchen and pulled out my silver phone. I punched in Carlisle's number and he answered on the first ring.

"I'm going to kill her," I snapped into the receiver without any pretense.

There was a pause: "I'm sorry?"

"That newborn…. Seriously, Carlisle, if your theory is correct about us bringing our strongest human traits into this life, than dodo over here must have been mentally handicapped."

Another pause, then: "Is everything alright? Are you still feeling out of it?"

"That isn't funny," I said moodily. "I'm not playing, that-that newborn has me ready to go hurling off a cliff."

Again, another pause and I tapped my foot impatiently. Finally, Carlisle said: "Edward, is something wrong?" he asked again.

It was my turn to be silent, not being able to find the right words to say without sounding like a complete lunatic. Slowly, I sank to the kitchen floor against the wall, propped one elbow up on my knee and rested my forehead in my left hand. "Carlisle, is it just me or is the world going a little nuts?"

"I'm…not following you."

I looked up briefly and jumped. Addy was only inches away, sitting with her legs crossed and her arms folded in her lap. I put a hand over the phone. "I told you to stop doing that!" I snarled. She only blinked. "_Evaporate_…NOW!"

Addy's lip stuck out in a brief pout, than she rose in a flash and darted from the room. I sighed in relief.

"Edward?" Carlisle was asking, "Are you still there?"

"Carlisle, I think I'm finally losing it…I remember a similar case we studied in medical school—too much stress and the mind goes spiraling into a twisted reality. You following me?"

"Maybe his brain was affected," came Rosalie's sneering voice from the background. I felt the hackles rise on the back of my neck.

"Carlisle, I heard that. Tell her to say that again—no, I dare her to say that again…see what happens when she gets home."

Carlisle's voice came agitated. "Grow up you two."

I lowered my voice, realizing how crazy I really did sound and tried to present a rational case. "Carlisle, you really have to listen to me…she's just _unnatural._"

"Edward, she's a vampire."

"Carlisle, I'm not an idiot." I huffed. "I know what a vampire is—I've been one for over a hundred years."

"I'm sorry, then. Please continue."

"It's just the way she acts. It's like _she's trying_ to be a vampire. It creeps me out."

"Creeps you out?" he asked with a hint of amusement.

"I know I sound crazy and maybe it _is _just my imagination, but, well, I can't see her—"

"She's invisible?" Carlisle's voice sounded confused.

"No, let me finish!" I drew in a deep breath before answering: "I mean, I can't see her thoughts at all. I close my eyes and concentrate and the only thing that appears is darkness."

"I thought we already went through this…"

I stood and walked slowly towards the living room. "I know, I know…it's just doesn't seem clear, I mean Alice can't see her future…Jasper can't detect or control her feelings and I can't hear her thoughts. It's like she's an illusion—like she doesn't exist….something that was dreamed up…."

I froze, horror creeping into my body. "Oh…my…god."

I dropped the phone, oblivious to Carlisle calling my name. "Addy, what-have-you-done?" I rasped, unable to find a real voice.

Addy looked at me, innocence nearly dripping from her body. "What's this?" she held out her hand, displaying the pearl white of a key from my sacred piano.

I wanted to slap myself or her or just somebody. I snatched the broken key from her hand and examined it closely. "It's now your death penalty! I'm going to kill you for this!" Okay, I just needed to remain calm and rational. I will not let this thing get the best of me. Calm…calm…

Addy looked bewildered. "What do you mean?"

"What do you mean what do I mean?" I moaned with a cracking voice. "Is this the only one you broke off?" I struggled to maintain a reasonable amount of coherency.

I looked at Addy and waited for a response. Slowly, she shook her head. "There was a black one, too."

I practically flew to the victim and gaped in blank horror. The piano looked natural enough from behind but, now, looking at the keyboard, I could see erratic keys missing. A white one here, a black one there... _It was like a black and white horror movie! _I spun back around and nearly stumbled backwards. She was right there, eyes wide, leaning in to study the piano as well.

"Why did you do this?" I asked in rage, shaking the broken piece in her face. "_Why?"_

Her bottom lip trembled and she reached a tentative hand to stroke an untouched key. "I didn't mean to break it," she whispered. With her other hand, she held out the rest of the pieces to me pleadingly.

I gathered the remaining pieces to my chest with trembling hands pausing ceremoniously before quickly trying to fit them back into place. "I can't believe this…how _stupid _can you get?" I mumbled to myself, slowly counting back from ten in my head, curbing the urge to fly into a killing spree. But I could feel my control slipping and my cauldron of emotions starting to boil over.

Behind me, Addy began talking as though this was the most natural thing in the world. "I'm not from hell, like you are…a Doctor made me…"

I turned her with deadly slowness. "_What_?" I demanded hoarsely, desperately.

For a moment, we stared at each other and I could feel my sudden emotions simmering out. Her eyes were pleading me to do something and I couldn't help but soften up from her helpless look. "What?" I asked more calmly, swallowing hard.

She hesitated and looked carefully around the room, as though checking to see if anyone else was in here, hiding. Than she looked back at me, her eyes losing there charm and becoming completely serious.

Her jaw trembled and she drew closer to me and I bent so I could see her more clearly. "Addy, what is it?"

"I don't know,"

"Addy, you said something about a doctor."

"I said _I don't know!_"

I narrowed my eyes slightly. The room was completely silent. As though the earth had taken time to pause and hold its breath for this one moment. "What doctor?"

She clamped her mouth shut, her glistening teeth digging into her lip. She was refusing to speak of anything else. My face twitched as I fought another bout of rage sputtering up in my chest. Knowing I needed to walk away and I threw the useless pieces of the piano to the floor where they scattered sparsely on the carpet.

"I'll see you in hell,"

As I marched up the staircase I vaguely heard her whisper. "See you there."


	4. Chapter 4

Tiny puffs of snow swirled in a downward spiral towards the earth, falling from piles of darkening gray clouds. The brief sunlight had already faded into the shadows of twilight, leaving behind an inauspicious darkness where not a single pinprick of a star dared to glitter even faintly in the oncoming night.

Bella and I sat in the recesses of flickering candles and I watched as shadows danced across her pale face as she slept against my side. The room was quiet and peaceful; there was not a stir in the air, only the gentle lull of tranquility. Everything seemed to hang timelessly in a comforting blanket of silence. Her tiny hand was fragile and warm as it rested in mine, relaxed and open. I could feel the fevered pulse of her blood beneath the ivory skin. Gently, tenderly, I smoothed the base of my thumb over the faint creases of her palm and her fingers gave a light twitch in response and curled unconsciously around my palm, but, other than that, she remained unmoving. Her head was tilted against my chest. She had let loose the braid in her hair and it spilled like dark satin over her exposed neck in wild curls, hiding the flushed skin from my view. I took my free hand and brushed back the wispy strands, revealing the bandaged gash on her neck and the faint lines of tendons beneath the pale membrane of her skin, strained from the angle of her head. Closing my eyes, I drew her limp hand to my cheek and let the warmth spread over my icy face.

Carlisle lay on his stomach only a couple feet from us, his head bowed over a thick book. His golden eyes flickered back and forth as he read and the information that he was absorbing poured from his thoughts and into mine. Esme had her head resting on his back and her wavy, caramel hair splayed out on his shoulder and onto the white carpet. Beyond my mother sat Alice and Jasper nearly nose to nose as they hunched over a chess board, their thoughts were concentrated on the game. Jasper held his chin in one hand, his eyes narrowing as Alice's hand flicked his white pawn over with a black knight. Then, sitting on the couch was Addy. She stared with wide, unblinking eyes at the board game that Alice and Jasper played as she rocked slowly in her spot.

I turned back to the window then to hide my frown. When my family had arrived home in the wake of the beginning flurry of snowflakes, Addy seemed unaffected by Bella's presence or smell. She had merely sniffed her shoulder than walked away, seeming no longer interested in the fragile human whose life source flowed thick and hot only inches from her grasp. Though it had bothered everyone else, Carlisle had said that as long as she can control herself, why worry unnecessarily _why_ she _shouldn't_ be able to control herself. I, for one, had found it suspicious but had voiced no opinion.

"I won," Alice announced, planting her queen right next to Jasper's king. She added: "Again."

Jasper chuckled to himself. "You have an advantage." He agreed reluctantly. Alice only responded with a beaming smile, her face triumphant. She turned to the newborn on the couch.

"You want to play, Addy?"

Addy's face brightened and she crawled down from the couch. Jasper scooted over, allowing her room to play. She plucked a pawn from the board and held it up to candle light. "Soo, this…can it move anywhere?" she asked.

Jasper shook his head, "No, this only goes forward one or backwards one."

She set it back down and lifted a rook. "What about this?"

"That can go diagonal."

"And the queen can go anywhere, can't she?"

"Yes."

Addy then balanced a knight in her hand. "What can I do with this?"

Jasper smiled weakly. I could tell he didn't enjoy the attention. "Forward two, to the side one. Like an _L_."

"An _L_?" Addy echoed, scrunching her nose in thought.

Jasper nodded than sighed.

"Are you ready or not?" Alice asked in a challenging tone.

Addy lifted her chin slightly than smacked down a pawn forward one square.

Alice pursed her lips and eyed her chess pieces with consideration. _I can't see…_ I heard Alice as she began the thought in confusion than she shoot an uneasy glance at me. I knew she didn't like being blind. Slowly, she slid a rook across the board, her face displaying her hesitancy.

I turned away from the game when Bella stirred in her sleep and mumbled something unintelligible. Carlisle lifted his eyes from the book and watched us silently for a moment. Bella heaved a sigh and pulled her hand from mine, flexing her fingers and stretching her neck.

"Is she awake?" Carlisle asked, marking his place and closing the book. Esme shifted her head off his back and moved into a sitting position; her hair cascaded over her shoulders as she leaned forward towards Bella and me.

I ducked my head to watch Bella's face and smiled to myself. "No." I answered after a moment. I had never told any of my family of Bella's amusing antics as she slept and I intended to keep it that way.

Carlisle moved towards us by the window and placed a hand on the side of Bella's neck.

"What are you doing?" I watched as he slowly began to pull back the bandage off her neck. Her skin showed red around the sutures.

"I wanted to take her up the hospital for this laceration," he frowned. "I think it's infected."

"What are you going to do?"

My father's frown deepened slightly. _There's nothing I can do without the proper equipment. _Aloud he said: "I was going to let it air out for a while—the gauze could be trapping in the bacteria."

"Can't you just give her a dose of penicillin?" I said, wrinkling my nose slightly as the smell of Bella's blood darkened somewhat. Out of the corner of my eye, I saw Jasper's back stiffen. But other than that he didn't move. _I'm fine. _He thought gruffly, sensing my protective stare.

Carlisle raised his eyes to me briefly. "I don't have any," he answered, gently unpeeling the rest of the medical tape. "I used the rest this morning on a little girl with the chicken pox—it was a bad case. I had to place her in the ICU because the fever had almost destroyed her organs." He froze and narrowed his eyes. "Edward, don't move."

Confusion and fear sparked in my chest. "What? What's wrong?"

"Hold on—Esme, get me my bag, please."

She was back in a split second. Carlisle stuck a hand in his black bag and pulled out a medical scope. He switched on the light and aimed it right at my eye. With his free hand, he pulled back an eyelid much like he had before last night.

"Carlisle, what the hell…" I began to protest.

"What are you looking at?" Alice came up behind Carlisle. _Addy won. _She pouted at me.

"The color of your eyes, Edward…" the doctor's voice trailed off. "Do you feel different?"

I scrunched my eyebrows together. "I always feel different—I _am _a _vampire_."

I received no reply.

"What do you see, dear?" Esme asked, sounding worried for my welfare. I rolled my eyes.

"Edward, hold still," Carlisle reprimanded sharply. "It looks…well…like there's this little piece of green—"

Alice gasped and her eyes grew distant only a second before the front door flew open with a tremendous bang and we all swiveled our heads towards it. Against my chest, Bella jerked awake with a startled gasp. Alice leapt to her feet, pushing Addy back against the couch protectively.

I saw Emmett's silhouette standing just beyond the threshold, dripping with icy water. "Soorrry." He gasped and he shook his head out like a wet dog, spraying us all with droplets of water. Rosalie pushed past him into the house, looking absolutely livid. She was screaming a stream of curses in her mind as she wrung out her long blond hair and flipped it over her head, letting the drops puddle on the carpet.

Carlisle stood, his face wrought with concern. "What happened?" he demanded. Bella slithered out from under my arm, her eyes wide as she stood. I followed her example, keeping a hand under her arm.

"You wouldn't _believe _what just attacked me and Rose! It chased us onto a frozen lake—we didn't know _that_ until the ice broke and we fell in—"

"No," Rosalie sputtered, glaring viciously. "_You _fell in—_I jumped_ _in_ trying to save you."

"_Pssh,_" Emmett waved her off with a hand. "I didn't need to be saved. You were just overreacting."

"What was it?" I persisted through clenched teeth, already knowing the answer.

Emmett turned to me, his golden eyes wide. "It was like vampire-zilla!" he exclaimed. "That thing was a beast…"

"I think it was the same thing that attacked Edward—that's why we decided to run instead of trying to fight it. I didn't want the same thing that happened to you—happen to me."

"Makes sense," I growled sarcastically.

"Why didn't I see this?" Alice's voice raised an octave, her large eyes panicked. Jasper laid a hand on her shoulder, his face dark.

"It's not your fault," I said reassuringly. "Don't panic now."

Bella's face looked green. "And you guys came straight here?" she asked in a high, hysterical voice.

"Well, yeah," Rosalie raised her eyebrow disgustingly. "What's it to you?"

"_Edward!_" she squeaked desperately.

I understood completely. "_You led it here_?" I spat the words out with contempt, the hackles rising on the back of my neck.

Rosalie bristled. _What did you want us to do? _She hissed silently.

I groaned.

"We have to fight!" Emmett bunched his fists.

"We have to get out of here!" Esme countered loudly, angrily. I thought I heard Addy whimper.

I looked down at Bella and saw her staring at Carlisle expectantly. I knew she, like the rest of us, looked to him for the final word. I whirled on Alice, eyes wide. She was on the floor again rocking back and forth, holding her head between her hands.

"There's nothing there," she moaned. "Everything keeps going black…"

"We can't just _run_!" Jasper spoke with an implacable expression. Being the militant that he was, running from a fight was inexcusable.

I released Bella and glared at my brother. "What do you intend we do, then?" I stipulated acidly. "There's no way we should put any of us at risk. You felt what this thing can do from my experience—what if he got his hands on Alice or Esme?"

Carlisle looked at each of us with a pensive expression. "I…agree with Edward…" he said slowly. "It's best if we just leave for now."

Emmett huffed indignantly, crossing his arms.

"Well, why are we just standing here then?" Esme glared at Emmett.

"We're going to have to take your jeep, Emmett," Carlisle spoke pointedly. "I, Addison, Edward, Bella, and you will ride together. Alice and Jasper—you two need to notify the Quileute pack, they should be on the look out as well. Rosalie and Esme will have to go on foot,"

"You're going to send Alice and Jasper into the Quileute territory?" Rose jabbed her finger towards the two vampires. "Are you asking for a war, Carlisle?"

I saw Carlisle shoot a glance at Bella. "They will need to know if something like this is loose." He answered calmly.

"What about Charlie?" Bella asked me, tugging frantically the sleeve of my shirt.

"He'll be with the wolves, Bella…he'll be safe." I assured her distractedly, letting my free hand run soothingly through her tangled hair. Bella bit her lip but said nothing else. I knew she wasn't entirely convinced.

"We'll be fine," Alice spoke quickly. "I'm sure of that."

Addy, silent and unnoticed, had inched her way next to me. I could feel her trembling. "Edward…I don't feel so good."

I ignored her and pulled the hooded sweatshirt off my back and handed it to Bella, "Wear this—it's going to be cold…"

Bella obliged more calmly than I expected and I realized that we had been through this routine before. That thought sickened me. Was it always going to be this vicious cycle?

Within the proximity of only a few seconds, everyone was ready to leave. Carlisle swung the door open, letting in a blast of snowy wind. The fragile flames of the scattered candlesticks were puffed out and we were plunged into darkness. Bella immediately clung to my side with a gasp and I could hear the pounding of her heart thudding out of control.

"Come on, Addy," I said, lifting Bella into my arms.

Addy shook her head; her pupils dilated so fully that the bloody redness of her irises had disappeared.

I paused on the threshold and gestured angrily at her. "_Come on_!"

When she didn't move, Carlisle yanked her by the elbow and towed her out the door. I sprinted to the red jeep backed into the shadows of our garage and threw Bella into the seat. With blurred hands, I fastened the spider web of buckles and turned towards Carlisle who hoisted me Addy's huddled form and I repeated the process, and then climbed in between the two while Carlisle jumped into the front passenger seat. Emmett took the wheel. The engine roared to life and Emmett thrust it into high gear. We lurched backwards and Bella jerked forward in her seat.

"Take a right on the highway." Carlisle instructed.

"I know." Emmett growled grumpily, spinning the car around with a wild turn of the wheel.

"Edward…" Bella started, leaning forward against the seatbelt.

"Are you sure Alice will be okay?" I asked my father, clenching the shoulder of the seat in front of me.

_No one can be entirely sure of anything at this point._

"_Edward_…" Bella said louder.

"What is it, Bella?" I asked, frowning worriedly.

"I think something's wrong with Addy."

I turned my head. Addy sat next to me, her body shaking so badly she couldn't seem to hold her head up right. Melted snow droplets beaded her spiraled curls and clung to her eyelashes like bits of clear diamonds. Her fists were clenched so tightly that her veins popped out, strained against the snow-white skin.

"Carlisle, something isn't right," I said slowly, drawing in a deep breath. I hadn't noticed it before but her smell had an undertone that was oddly familiar.

"What's wrong?" he asked, spinning around in his seat.

I stared at the newborn, trying to penetrate the wall surrounding her mind. Her eyes were empty and unseeing; they darted around the cab, oblivious to the sudden audience watching her. Mixing with the water on her face, a tiny orb of blood slid slowly from the corner of her mouth.

"Bella, close your eyes," I demanded. I don't know how I knew what was going to happen next, but I did. So much that I leaned away from the vampire and grimaced.

Addy's body convulsed and she doubled over, gagging. She heaved once, twice than vomited blood. It pooled on the gray carpet, acid bubbles of clear venom bursting on the surface. Thin strings of blood-streaked vomit hung from the corners of her mouth and she gasped in ragged bursts, her face twisting in disgust and fear.

"Oh, my god," I groaned.

"Addy, are you alright?' Carlisle asked hurriedly, reaching over the seat.

Unable to speak, Addy just shook her head and retched again, her eyes flying open. The putrid smell of curdled animal blood filled the interior of the jeep.

"_Gross_!" Emmett choked as he pushed his car to go faster. Snow jetted by, creating a white curtain out the window and the world was blotted out by white.

"I don't want to go back…" Addy groaned, rocking her head back and forth.

"What?" I asked, bewildered. I pressed myself protectively in front of Bella, keeping her in the corner.

Addy squeezed her eyes shut, her mouth turning down in a sickened grimaced. Sobs, horrible, gut-wrenching sobs shook her thin frame. They were tearless and uncontrollable.

"Carlisle, do something!" I hollered. "She's losing it!"

"I don't want to go back!" Addy's voice raised a hysterical octave.

"You're not going back, Addy," Carlisle soothed gently. _I have no idea what she's talking about._

Addy threw her head back and her sobbing grew louder.

"Addy, calm down—"

"_No…no, no, NO_!"

Bella jumped in fear. She plugged her ears, her face turning a swallow color of green. She buried herself against my back.

"Addy…" I said loudly, sternly, hoping to snap her out of it.

"_I don't want to go back_!" With that, Addy raised her head and opened her eyelids, meeting my horrific stare with pale colored eyes. The pupils had contracted to pinpoints and the irises had turned chalky. "_I'm sorry…_" she whispered monotonously.

Unconsciously, I pressed a hand to my dead heart. I was vaguely aware of a pain slowly intensifying within my chest. Like the low buzz of the radio, I heard Bella and Carlisle's voice speaking to me in blurred voices. Bella was shaking me because I had pinned my weight on top of her and she could barely breathe. But it didn't seem to register. I closed my eyes and concentrated hard.

The pain was unbearable.


	5. Chapter 5

I must have blacked out briefly because I was suddenly aware of Carlisle's uncharacteristically angry voice, the feel of Bella's hot breath on my neck, and the smell—I almost groaned—what an awful smell of sour vomit hanging in the stifled air of the oversized jeep. For a moment, I couldn't move for the burning in my chest. I must have done it again…why does this keep happening? Vampires can't do this—vampires are not _able _to do this. I mentally vowed to get even with that demon if I ever met up with him again. He won't know what hit him.

"How can you forget about gas?" Carlisle was speaking icily, his usual calm demeanor shattered. He was turned at a ninety degree angle, facing Emmett with cold speculation. "After you took this tank out for a five-hour drive—how could you forget about the simple asset of gasoline?"

"I didn't know something like this would happen," Emmett countered reproachfully, sounding defensive. I listened as he tapped the wheel unconsciously and it was then that I noticed that we weren't moving. The engine had gone quiet. Vaguely, I heard him cursing in his head and mentally taking notes about storing extra cans of gasoline.

Carlisle banged his fist on the dashboard, which I assumed left a formidable dent. Emmett's mental cursing grew louder. "Emmett, you can drive some beings to the extreme." He shook a livid finger at his son and Emmett huffed indignantly. The windshield-wipers frantically whipped back and forth but did little good as the snow continued to build along the glass.

"Hey," Emmett complained loudly. "Careful with the merchandise!"

I opened my eyes slowly, unwillingly, and was greeted by a brown curtain of hair hanging over my face. I recognized the scent tickling my nose from the soft tips of hair brushing my cheek and forehead and inhaled deeply.

"Are you okay?" Bella asked anxiously, seeing my open eyes, and running a tender hand through my hair. I could tell I had frightened her immensely.

"Yes," I answered softly, not wanting to move an inch from my angel's warm hands.

"To be serious, I almost decided to perform CPR on you," she admitted hesitantly and I felt her skin warm considerably.

I chuckled weakly, trying to cover the wince that resulted from a sudden spark of pain in my chest. "Not that it would have done any good." I reached up and traced a finger down her cheekbone. "My heart stopped beating over a hundred years ago, love, nothing can change that now."

I saw a smile grace her lips and felt smug. Slowly, I sat up from where I had slumped against Bella, rubbing my chest absentmindedly. She picked out the movement and stared for a moment before looking away. "I'm fine," I insisted and she narrowed her eyes at me. She turned to stare out the window, thinking thoughts that were forever hidden to me and I desperately wanted to unlock them, to know what she what was really going on in that fascinating head of hers.

I scanned the dark compartment and stopped at the heap at next to me, a sick feeling rose in my throat. Addison lay lifeless against the car door; her head sagged against one shoulder. Her shirt, which had been too big for her skinny frame, had fallen off the shoulder her head had lolled to, revealing her pale skin. Her eyes were half open, though they were rolled back so I only saw the whites. She wasn't even breathing, looking much like the weak newborn I had found in the forest only two days ago with dried blood spotting the front of her shirt.

"She's been like that for several minutes now." Bella spoke in a whisper, as though she were afraid to disturb something. She stared as well, biting her lip.

I wrinkled my nose. "She reminds me of the girl from the _Exorcist_." I said softly. I half expected her to go into a seizure and start screaming but I decided not to tell Bella that. "Have you ever seen that movie?"

Bella shook her head and pursed her lips but said nothing else because Carlisle broke in irately, addressing Emmett once again.

"So what do you propose we do? We can't just sit here like ducks on a pond."

She inclined her head towards Carlisle. "He's been like this for several minutes too. I've never seen him angry before," Bella shuddered in thought. "It's kinda scary. I think he's just really worried about you, though."

I huffed in frustration. "I don't see why he is." I muttered back, folding my arms over my chest as a slight twinge prickled along my ribs. "How long was I out?"

"Several minutes."

"Oh, yes, you've said that before." I closed my eyes and leaned my head on Bella's soft shoulder. The pain had faded to a dull buzzing feeling and I did my best to ignore it. "Are _you_ alright?"

I felt her nod against my head. "I'm not the one passing out."

"Touché."

Carlisle cut in to our conversation, his voice evidently calmer, "How're doing, Edward?" he asked, turning in the seat to study me over the headrest. His eyes were stressed though and the gold had darkened to an almost black. _You startled me for a moment—first I had Bella's lacerations, Addy throwing up everywhere, than you just blacking out for no apparent reason._

"I'm fine," I repeated, opening one eye in emphasis and pretending I didn't hear his thoughts. Carlisle's frown deepened and I could tell he didn't believe me. He was reading me like a billboard. But he averted his penetrating gaze from me and examined Addy's lifeless bundle.

"Is she alright?" he asked slowly, eyeing the sickness spewed on the back of the vinyl and floor. _Rosalie's going to have a stroke when she sees this._

I rolled my eyes then grimaced, thinking suddenly about the glazed-eyed look Addy had given me. "She's not moving." I suggested. What had meant when she apologized to me—and why did that pain come to me so suddenly? I shook my head and pressed a hand to my chest. Nothing. No pain. No numbness.

Bravely, Bella leaned over me and prodded Addy's shoulder tentatively. The newborn vampire didn't respond, didn't move, didn't breathe. She just laid there like a corpse. No, a corpse looked better.

"Maybe we should just leave her behind." Emmett suggested suddenly, turning around in his seat as well. _She got vomit all over my jeep! This thing wasn't on sale._

Carlisle glared at him, appalled. "Of course not! Why would suggest such a thing?" he added: "No one gets left behind. We're family—all of us. Even Bella. Even Addison."

"We could leave Emmett behind." I smiled crookedly, pulling away from Bella's shoulder. Bella shifted suddenly beside me.

"Very funny, Edward." Emmett sneered, revering the engine in vain. _I wasn't the one throwing up everywhere._

"I'll leave both of you behind." Carlisle concluded with a tone of finality. He was still angry about the broken down jeep. I didn't think he was going to let this go. Suddenly, he tone grew soft and gentle—the voice he only reserved for Bella. "Bella, are you alright?"

My eyes snapped open to see tears streaming down Bella's cheeks. Apprehension blossomed in my stomach. She was clutching her hand to her chest and I could see that her wrist was swollen.

"Nothing's wrong," she whimpered, glaring wildly at me. I didn't know what that look was for so I abandoned it.

"Bella, what did you do?" I quickly checked over the inside of the jeep, looking for anything out of the usual that could have offered any danger to Bella. Nothing seemed out of place. It was basically baby proof…but obviously it wasn't Bella-proof.

"I…punched your shoulder," she spluttered, glaring some more.

I scrunched my eyebrows. "What for?" I asked, baffled, mentally going through a list of things I could have done to provoke Bella into violence.

"Because of what you said to Emmett—that was mean."

Emmett roared with sudden laughter, throwing his head back and guffawing at the roof of his jeep. Carlisle gave him a disapproving glance but Emmett didn't seem to notice.

Bella hesitated briefly, than spoke over Emmett. "You mean…you didn't feel that?" she spoke with disbelief and irritation.

I shook my head, feeling horrible. "No." I pressed my lips into a taut line to keep from displaying my amusement. Only Bella.

Bella huffed and looked away, her face grumpy.

"Let me see," I gently, carefully pulled her injured hand away from her, despite her reluctance and pushed the oversized sleeve up her arm. I could feel the break in her wrist where the segment of bones and sinew pressed against her skin, almost puncturing through. The blood had pooled around the breakage, causing the swelling. "Bella, you _snapped_ your wrist."  
Bella whimpered again, her face hot and pinched with resentment towards me and I automatically felt guilty. "I'm really sorry, Bella."

"Humph," she replied stubbornly and I chuckled to myself.

"I don't have a brace to give you, Bella," Carlisle spoke softly towards her and I guessed he was saving his angry voice for Emmett and me. "Are you going to be alright?" I could see that he wanted to switch into doctor mode with so many sick people in the car, but he didn't have any idea how to do it. And, from the thoughts in his mind, I knew he mentally kicked himself for not being prepared for Bella's wonderful ability to cause herself harm.

"I'm fine," Bella said, wiping away the last of her tears. "It doesn't really hurt that bad—it just made me mad that I didn't even _hurt_ _him_." I smiled and drew her close to my chest; despite the searing feeling that flared in my chest I received from the movement. I knew there was another sorrow beneath her words that caused the tears—not the pain, sparked by the memory of Jacob Black. I remember she had punched his jaw once and, instead of injuring him like she had intended, she fissured her knuckle. I bristled at the memory of him kissing her and did my best to hide it.

I heard the sound of the motor before I saw it. Carlisle's face immediately drew alert and soon a clunker of a blue van chugged through the swirl of snow. Bella raised her head as it passed, her eyes wary.

"Carlisle, he's stopping," Emmett said nervously as the large van heaved to a halt, smoke sputtering out of the back pipe. "What are we going to do?" he asked, hurriedly twisted the keys in the ignition. The engine groaned but offered nothing else. "_Dammit_!" he hissed through clenched teeth.

A tall, wiry man with wire-rimmed glasses stepped out of the van wearing a thick coat, a wool, hat, and gloves complete with rubber boots.

"Just act normal everyone," Carlisle said calmly, evenly.

"Yeah, right," I laughed humorlessly in sarcasm. "It's not like we're not already."

_Edward, please try not to be too sarcastic. Just relax._

Quickly, yet at a human pace, Carlisle unlatched the door and stepped into the dying blizzard. The lanky man waved at Carlisle and trudged towards him with his hands in his pockets.

Fast but gentle, I climbed over Bella and opened the car door, letting in a jet of blistering wind. Addy still didn't move.

"Wait," Bella grabbed my arm with her good hand. "Let me go with you."

I relented without a fight, turning my face from her to hide my disapproval. I didn't want an argument. She kept hold of my arm as I climbed out and we both weren't expecting what would happen next.

"I'll stay here," Emmett grumbled, still clenching the steering wheel tightly in her massive hands, his bands of muscle popping out along his arms.

The moment I put my weight on the ground, my legs gave out and I collapsed ungracefully into a deep drift of snow, dragging Bella down with me. She gave a short shriek that was lost in the howling wind and toppled from the jeep and fell face down in the white powder. She raised her head, recovering quickly, spitting out a mouthful of snow. Unfortunately I raised my head at the same time and I wasn't able to stop my full momentum in time. My head and her nose connected, throwing Bella back. She didn't even cry out it happened so fast.

Bright red blood gushed from her nose, spattering garishly on the dusty white in morbid starkness. Instinctively she lay still for a moment, breathing slow and even.

Time slowed for me and my ribs lanced with sudden pain.

She raised a hand to her face—as if checking to see if it was still there. Blood covered her hand. It began trickling through her fingers. And down her wrist.

I couldn't get to her fast enough, even though I was only inches away. "Bella," I gasped, taking her face in between my hands, ignoring the crimson as it stained my hands and the rush of venom that followed. "I swear I didn't mean too—I swear!"

To my utmost relief and bafflement, Bella smiled up at me, though I could tell it was rather forced. "It was an accident," she said in a nasally voice, sounding as though she was suffering from a serious cold. "I'm fine." She wiped at the blood, succeeding only in smearing it.

"Did I break it?" I asked anxiously, examining it closely, carefully touching the tip of it. She didn't flinch.

"I don't think so," a strange look past over her face and she giggled weakly. "Edward, you got a hard head."

I managed an unconvincing smile.

"Bit slippery there, isn't it?" an unfamiliar voice asked from above us and we both looked up. The man stood over us, offering a hand to Bella and me. Bella graciously accepted it while I declined, rising slowly to my feet on my own. No weakness this time—only that annoying twinge in my chest, slowly growing to pain again.

Carlisle handed Bella his handkerchief and pressed a hand to her nose. "It's not broken," he said. "But you'll have two black eyes in the morning. The prize-fighter look, Bella." He laughed quietly to himself. _Be more careful next time, or it might be her skull you crush next._

Bella sighed. "It always happens to me."

Carlisle smiled and I looked away momentarily.

"The name's Arthur Dean," the man said with a grin, despite the wind pounding his face. He possessed a thick, British accent. He yelled above the wind to be heard. "Are you guys stranded?" _Strange fellows these folk are._

Carlisle nodded his head, gesturing to the jeep. "Yes, the engine has run out of gas." The snow had started to ease up, though the wind continued, and the man relaxed even more though he was still slightly at ease in our presence. He studied each of turn, confused by the plainness Bella had next to us.

Arthur gave a low whistle and patted the side of the jeep. "Hell of a motor car you have here?" _Must have cost a fortune—they must be hard rich._

Carlisle shrugged, "We indulge every now and then."

_I'd say. _Arthur leaned towards the open car door.

"Uhh…" I reached to stop him but froze at Carlisle's warning glance. _Calm…_ he reminded me.

I heard the man's thoughts bridle at the smell. "Is she sick?" he asked, his eyebrow rising in a questioning slant.

"She has epilepsy," I said, lying without hesitation.

Arthur's frown deepened. "Do you need a ride up to the accident department?"

"The emergency room?" Carlisle asked. "No, she'll be fine. It happens all the time. I'm a doctor."

"Really?" he looked at Addy's slumped form again. "Is that blood?"

"It's kool-aid." Bella piped up suddenly. Carlisle and I looked at her. She continued with only a mere glance at our faces. "She threw up red kool-aid."

"Ah," Arthur wrinkled his nose and gave Bella a long, appraising look. Then he changed the subject. "If you only need some petrol, I have extra in my boot if you need it."

Bella looked down at his shiny pair of boots, looking utterly confused.

"He means his trunk," I stage-whispered loud enough that she could hear.

Bella went red.

"It would be greatly appreciated," Carlisle went on without even looking at Bella. Though I heard him chuckle in his mind.

Arthur's Cheshire grin appeared again. "Of course."

Only a few minutes later, Arthur was popping the lid off a gas can and carefully pouring it into our gasket.

"Bloody horrible what happened to that family back in Forks, eh?"

I snapped my head up and Carlisle's voice immediately sharpened. "What happened?"

"You haven't heard?" he paused, shaking his head. _Too busy wallowing in that money of yours, I suppose. _ "They found a whole family dead in their house, blood _everywhere. _Just like some chap just went in and tore them all to pieces."

I looked at Carlisle with urgent, wide eyes. Carlisle didn't meet my gaze as he continued to look intently at Arthur.

"Do you know their names?" Bella asked in a strangled voice. The snow was falling gently again and she blinked rapidly as snowflakes entangled in her eyelashes.

Arthur screwed the lid back on and thought for a moment. "I can't rightly recall…New…New…"

"The Newton's?" Bella gasped, immediately throwing herself at my side.

I inwardly cringed. Though I had no preference towards Mike, I still felt horrible for Bella.

Arthur studied her. "Did you know them?" he asked, removing his glasses and wiping them off with the hem of his shirt.

Bella didn't provide him an answer so he continued.

"That's why I'm heading back home—there's something not right when a small town gets a multiple homicide like that. Bone-chilling actually." He shook his head and turned to head back to his van. "Someone would have to be a monster to conceive a crime in that magnitude. Three children…" he sighed. "Nice meeting you."

We all looked at each other when he said _monster. _Bella shook her head at me_._

Arthur Dean picked his way through the snow and threw the empty can into the back of the "boot". He climbed into his van and chugged away, moving slowly down the hidden road.

I spun around and caught Bella by the elbow, restraining her.

"Lemme go," she growled at me, struggling wildling against my steel grip. "Charlie is back there—I can't leave him. It's too dangerous!"

I reeled her back into my arms. "That's right, it is too dangerous, that's why we can't go back."

She continued to fight against me. The blood had dried in a smear on her face where she had attempted to wipe it away. I felt horrible about it—I've given her a concussion, stitches, a broken wrist, and a bloody nose all in the matter of two days. Maybe I should make her sit up front with Carlisle.

"Bella!" I continued, shooting Carlisle a pleading look for help. "Charlie is in La Push—he'll be fine! I promise!"

As Bella tried to twist out of my arm, still not listening, she suddenly elbowed me in the stomach and searing pain tore through my torso. I gasped and doubled over, releasing my hold and falling to hands and knees.

Bella didn't run. She stood there with her hands over her mouth and a terrified expression on her face. Carlisle, who had been watching the exchange silently, dropped to his knees. "Edward, what happened? Where does it hurt?" _What are we going to do with you? _His hands quickly made an assessment. _I don't understand!_

I shook my head and managed a weak laugh. "I…guess we're…even, Bella."

Bella let out a dry sob and fell down next to Carlisle. "I'm so sorry, Edward. I wasn't thinking…I never knew I could hurt you." She threw her arms around me and buried her face in the back of my neck.

"Well, now you know," I grimaced as the feeling began to pass.

The jeep suddenly rumbled to life and Emmett appeared in my peripheral vision. "What are guys doing out here? What's wrong with you, Edward?"

"Just checking out the snow…" I answered flatly.

"Well, Addy's awake—"

As I sat up, Addy appeared from around the van, looking as though she had just fallen off a cliff and gotten ran over by a semi. She watched me with her dead eyes, her arms hanging loosely at her sides. Deep, dark rings shadowed her dark eyes and red-brown blood crusted the hollow of her neck and stained the front of her shirt. Her face was bone white. Even the curls of her hair seemed to droop. "I'm feeling better now." She said, looking at each of us in turn.

Not even Carlisle had something to say to that.

"Where are we going?" she asked, her nostrils flaring slightly as she watched me struggle to my feet. Her eyes then flitted to Bella and she studied the blood on her face.

I pressed a hand to my chest as though I could push back the irritating pain throbbing around my still heart. Carlisle laid a hand on my back and Bella clutched my arm for fear of me falling again.

"Are you going to be all right?" my father asked gently. I nodded slowly, still massaging my chest.

"You better look at Bella's hand," I said quietly, trying to avert the attention from me.

Bella shook her head at him, glaring fearfully. "I barely feel it now. I've had worse."

Carlisle didn't listen to her. Tenderly, he pulled her to him and quickly examined the swollen wrist. He patted her back soothingly. "Your right about the break Edward…you must have hit him hard, Bella."

Bella stuck her bottom lip.

I chuckled to myself and leaned against Emmett's jeep.

Without waiting for any other pretense, Carlisle lifted her into the front seat, saying: "You might not want to sit back there."

Carlisle turned to me and opened his mouth to speak than froze in that ridiculous position, staring.

"What?" I turned around but saw nothing out of the norm. I turned back. "What is it?"

"Edward…" Carlisle seemed to be struggling for the right words. "Edward, your left eye…it's_ green_."

I reached automatically to my face. "Your lying," I accused stubbornly, my breathing quickened. Before Carlisle had time to respond, that pain returned.

"Ahhh…" I doubled over again, pain suddenly searing through my mind.

"What is it?" Carlisle asked loudly, "What is it?"

"My head!" I gasped. But it wasn't my head. It was much deeper than any normal headache. It was as if some invisible force was attacking my whole mind and being, creating an agony beyond pain.

Carlisle said something else but I didn't hear him. I was silent, still doubled over, breathing erratically and staring unseeing at the white-gray snow. I didn't understand.

_Green_


	6. Chapter 6

**Okay, first guys, I want to tell you how sorry i am for submitting the wrong chapter to the wrong story. I feel so idiotic and embarrassed. Trust me when i say that this is the right chapter and I promise I will upload another chapter tonight before bed just to make it up!!**

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For the first time in over a hundred years I felt as though I was burning up—literally—as though a fever raged my body, sending my usual cold body temperature soaring above average human body heat. Addy's soft touch to my skin, though she meant well, felt unbearably icy and I yanked my arm away from her hand, growling from deep within my chest. Beside my boiling temperature, the pain was now incessant, devoid of any sort of intervals of relief. Though the pain faded now and then, I always felt it, lancing through my rib cage or sparking down the length of my spine.

We had arrived at the cabin, large yet tucked away in the tangle of thickets, carefully keeping us inconspicuous. Alice and Jasper had successfully warned the Quileutes and Esme and Rosalie had arrived several hours before us, thanks to Emmett's inability to refill the gas tank of his jeep. The gasoline that Arthur Dean had generously given us had barely held out the rest of the journey, though it was just enough to send us sputtering to a stop only feet from the trail leading to the cabin.

Right now the pain had faded slightly and I lay with a cheek pressed to the cool ceramic tile of the kitchen, with shivering shadows fallen over me, cast by the icy crescent moon hanging like a curved icicle in the clouding sky. Twilight was ending, though the light of a new dawn had barely penetrated the snow-laden clouds. A darkness had fallen over our secluded piece of earth—a menacing shadow that all forms of light fled from.

In the murky kitchen, Carlisle sat only inches from me, patient and unconditioned, allowing his soothing presence to calm me. I could feel Addy on the other side of me, silent as a kitten and as still as a stone. But I knew she was watching me with her strange eyes, never once looking away. Bella was with Alice and Esme, away from me. I think Carlisle had sedated her, giving her a few, precious hours to slip into a deep, dreamless sleep, unbothered by the chaotic world around her. I didn't know exactly where the rest of my family was convened but I was almost sure that they were hovering outside the kitchen door, anxious yet silent like wraiths. _One…two…three…_ I began to count the seconds until another wave of agony hit. I pressed my hand against the squared tiles, letting the coldness soothe the burning. _Six…seven…eight…ni—_

Hot and cold flashes ripped up and down my spine like passing freight trains. I wanted to scream. I wanted to yell for help. But I could do nothing more than open my mouth and suck in ragged bursts of air. The red-hot fire exploded in my skull and my eyes rolled back in their sockets. And Carlisle was right there beside me, speaking mollifying words and I vainly strained to understand what he was saying to me, to make some sort of sense out of the turmoil. But his words were like the buzz of a badly tuned radio, crackling with static. I rocked my head back and forth, cursing myself into oblivion. Addy's frozen hands were on my arm again, tight—almost frantic; I didn't try to push her away this time, I didn't seem to have the strength to. Then a sudden, violent shudder coursed through my body and the spasm diminished again to a dull sensation.

I sagged against the floor, gasping from bitter relief. I opened my eyes carefully, tentatively; unsure if that simple motion would trigger the pain again. It didn't. Instead, I found that the world around me was rotating slowly like a kaleidoscope. My ears were ringing and my head was spinning, but for now, for the one brief moment, the horror was over. I was weak and trembling, curled into a ball. My hands were shaking and my stomach felt as though it was playing tug-o-war with the rest of my insides, but the pain was dull now so that I barely felt it. And for me, it was heaven.

_"We're almost there," Emmett's voice broke in above the rumble of the jeep—he sounded too serious to be Emmett._

_"Did you hear that, Edward," Carlisle had asked me, "We're almost there, just hang on."_

_Of course I heard. What did he think I was—stupid? The pain wasn't sending me into that deep of a stupor. I could still grasp at tidbits of information around me—like the way Bella's heart was beating so frantically, it was as though it didn't know for sure of what to do. Or the way Emmett fingers tapped the steering wheel in an offbeat, nervous way and how Addy kept touching my forearm to offer comfort. I also caught Carlisle glancing at me every few seconds, alarm and fear written clearly across his face. And I could hear my own breathing—erratic, hard and each breath I dragged in I could almost taste the vile smell of Addy's bloody vomit hanging in the air. …_fifteen_…_

The pain started again—excruciating, unbearable. It was intense, like icy fire crawling up my arms and slithering down my ribs and, finally, pooling in my stomach. I recoiled from it, shuddering, gasping. When I squeezed my eyes shut, I saw pinpricks of white light spiraling in my vision and a groan, deep and unearthly, broke from my throat. I curled my hands into tight fists and my neck twisted so that my forehead brushed the smooth surface of the floor.

And then it stopped, as quickly as it had come. Nauseated, I went limp, trying not to move, not to add any effort or energy to this tumbling universe around me. I clamped my eyes shut. Everything around me had become overwhelming—the gentle touch of Carlisle's hand on my back, Addy's fingers on my arm, the sound of my struggled breathing and the clock hanging above us, ticking in the respired measures—never-ending, unremitting. My senses had gone haywire and everything came at me in swirling, kaleidoscoping sounds, images, and sensations, pulsing, pounding, surging, and throbbing like a swollen thumb.

I could feel myself slowly sinking into a dark precipice, a place that only existed in the deep, unknown recesses of my mind. A place that was free of pain, of confusion, a place where I could forget about reality and become surrounded by nothing…

_"He told me one…" she hesitated, her face growing white than pink._

_"Go on," I urged softly, keeping my eyes on the road and clenching the steering wheel in apprehension. _

_"About vampires."_

_Alarms went off in my head, but I willed myself to remain calm. Calm. "And you immediately thought of me?" was I that obvious? Or was she just brilliantly observant?  
"No."_

_What a relief._

_"He…mentioned you family."_

_Oh. I continued to stare at the road. I didn't respond, didn't do anything. Calm…_

_…"I did some research on the Internet."_

_"And did that convince you?" I made my voice sound impartial, nonchalant. But inside felt like World War III was raging. I grasped the wheel iron-knuckled, curbing the urge to do anything irrational._

_"No." she spoke softly, looking down at her hands in her lap. "Nothing fit. Most of it was kind of silly. And then…" her voice trailed off and I waited but she said no more._

_"What?" I asked, flaring my nostrils._

_She looked out the car window, at the objects flying by. Bella's voice came barely as a whisper. "I decided that it didn't matter."_

The voices came muffled, as though they were spoken on the other side of a window. I couldn't find the strength to pull myself out enough to open my eyes or respond to the questions.

"What should we do? He's been like this for over an hour now—I could kick him and he still wouldn't move."

"There's nothing we can do, except wait. We'll take it as it comes."

"We can't just leave him lying there like a corpse. If Bella saw him, I think she would go into full cardiac arrest." Replied another voice, familiar but my mind was too foggy to distinguish the multitude of voices floating above me.

"Maybe we could move him to a bed, that way he'll look like he's only sleeping."

"That would be convincing—_oh, Bella, don't you worry, he's only sleeping!_"

"Leave it to you, Rosalie, to down-play everything that doesn't issue from your own mouth."

"Enough, you two. This is not the time, nor the place. Now lets please act civilized." There was a pause, then: "Alice, do you have anything?"

The voice that responded was distressed and absolutely miserable. "No, Carlisle. All I see is darkness."

_Anger, surprise, and confusion engulfed me all at once. I couldn't keep my voice from becoming raw. "It didn't matter?" Bella's head snapped up and she looked at me, her eyes widening slightly at the tone of my voice and at the incredulity on my face._

"_No," she said softly. "It doesn't matter to me what you are."_

_Unintended, a hard, mocking edge entered my voice. "You don't care if I'm a monster. If I'm not _human_?"_

"_No."_

_My emotions overtook me and all I could do was to stay silent, coldly staring straight ahead at the black pavement._

"_You're angry," Bella sighed, breaking my stiff silence. She sounded regretful. "I shouldn't have said anything."_

"_No," I said in a hard, flat voice, grinding the words through gritted teeth. "I'd rather know what you're thinking—even if what you're thinking is insane." Insanely right._

"_So I'm wrong again?" Bella challenged me, her tone indignant._

_For a moment I struggled with the right words to say. I threw out: "That's not what I was referring to. 'It doesn't matter'" I quoted, clenching my jaw tightly._

"_I'm right?" she gasped in shock and my chest tightened. In the darkness of the car, I heard she heart sputter across several beats._

"_Does it _matter_?" I spat the words back at her…_

Voices came again, penetrating through my hazy mind and pushing back the memories as though they were dust. I tried to open my eyes, to lift my head, to do _something_. But every ounce of strength seemed to have drained from every inch of my body and I was void of the ability to move at all. I was vaguely aware that I was no longer lying on the cold tile of the kitchen floor, but, rather, in a bed with my head limp on a pillow.

"Carlisle, I think you should come and look at Bella,"

"What is it, Alice?"

"I think she might have a fever…I'm not sure, her skin is always so warm, but she smells a bit funny. She won't stop crying, either. Can a human become dehydrated from crying too much? I tried to get her to drink water but she refused…I think she's going into shock."

Someone was rising from a nearby chair and I briefly felt the presence of a hand on my arm. "Stay with him, Alice. I'll be back shortly."

"_You might have called," Bella's tone was reproachful. It made me puzzled._

"_But I knew you were safe," I countered, looking at her._

"_But I didn't know where you were. I—" she hesitated, averting her eyes from mine. A blush began to creep up her neck._

"_What?" I urged, suddenly anxious._

"_I didn't like it. Not seeing you. It makes me anxious too." The blush crawled up her neck to her cheeks and then burst like a sunrise across her perplexed forehead._

_I didn't have an answer for this. I felt ecstatic yet extremely pained. The latter outweighed my happiness. Bella looked at me, waiting for me to speak._

"_Ah," I groaned, the only thing I could manage for a moment. "This is wrong."_

_Bella's eyes filled with confusion and hurt. "What did I say?"_

"_Don't you see, Bella? It's one thing for me to make myself miserable, but a wholly other thing for you to be so involved." I turned to her. It was imperative that she understood this! "I don't want to hear that you feel that way." I lowered my voice, unable to hide my urgency. "It's wrong. It's not safe. I'm dangerous, Bella—please, grasp that."_

"_No," Bella squeaked, her voice hinting at rebellious._

"_I'm serious," I growled out at her, no longer trying to restrain myself._

"_So am I." she retorted back. "I told you, it doesn't matter what you are. It's too late."_

_Panic flared in my chest and my voice whipped out, low and harsh." Never say that." I demanded._

_Bella bit her lip and stared at the road in front of us. I took in several deep breaths, suddenly feeling desperate to hear the mysterious thoughts revolving in her mind. "What are you thinking?' I asked in a raspy voice. She only shook her head and I turned my head to look at her. I studied her for a moment before horror and guiltiness washed over me like a tidal wave._

"_Are you crying?" I asked, appalled as I watched the tears, glittering like diamonds, as they sprinted down her pale cheeks._

_She quickly rubbed her hand across her cheek, sniffing._

"_No." she said, but her voice cracked. I realized how hurtful my words were to her and I felt the wild urge to draw her into my arms and comfort her. Hesitantly, I reached my right hand towards her, but I stopped, my stomach suddenly queasy, and placed it slowly back on the steering wheel, feeling miserable and weak._

"_I'm sorry," I whispered, my words burning with regret. So sorry._

It was light when I opened my eyes. Broken shafts of yellow rays streamed through the crude shutters, illuminating swirls of dust clouds hanging in the air. I blinked once, taking a moment to gather my bearings. Slowly, tentatively, I raised my head and waited. There was no pain, no burning sensation. I flexed my fingers and shifted, my left arm brushing something soft and warm. Relief filled me.

Bella laid next to me, curled up on her side, her face flushed. As I moved, she stirred, her eyes flittering open. She yawned than sat up quickly when she saw me.

"Edward!" she exclaimed but then seemed at a loss for words. Her hair stuck out in all directions and her eyes were wet from grogginess.

I smiled at her disheveled appearance. "You look awful. Are you are alright?"

She threw her arms around me and buried her face in my chest. "I am now." For a moment, we sat like that until she broke away from me. Her large eyes scrutinized me.

"You look like a mess, too," She reached up and patted down my hair. "A very good looking mess." Her smile seemed somewhat forced.

"Thanks," I threw my legs over the side of the bed and rotated my shoulders. "Was it just a dream?" I wondered aloud without even thinking.

Bella didn't answer, so I turned to look at her. But I knew it hadn't been a dream as my eyes picked out the stitched abrasion on the side of her neck, her wrapped wrist, and the two black eyes I had given her as a result of my carelessness. They had faded slightly, but they were still there—a severe contrast to the ivory color of her skin. "How's your nose?"

She knew I was trying to distract her. "Fine." She glared. "How's your chest?"

That threw me for a minute. "My chest?" I asked finally, giving her a speculating look.

Bella faltered ever so slightly. "Well…" she bit her lip.

"What?" I demanded, a scowl replacing my smile.

She looked at me cautiously. "Well, yesterday, you kept telling Carlisle that your chest hurt."

"I did?"

Bella nodded and turned her eyes away from me. It was an awkward silence, then, and I stared at the opposite wall where the boarding was chipped and faded. The last time we had been in this house was when Emmett had lost control, forcing us to hide for more then thirty years. I remembered that time as not a very enjoyable period we spent together. We were cramped and forced to share rooms. After a few years, everyone had grown extremely irritated and we snapped at each other often. Only Carlisle and Esme managed to stay intact—maybe because they were granted their own room. Anyway, it was pure heaven when we were able to move back to the mansion in Forks and for several weeks we isolated ourselves from the rest of the family, reveling in the alone time we had been forsaken at the cabin. I never knew we would be back here, with two extra persons along.

I slid out of bed then and studied Bella. She sat with the blanket piled in her lap. She wore a large, over-sized tee-shirt with the sleeves hanging to her elbows. It was wrinkled and looked like it belonged to Carlisle. Even it her pitiful, banged up state, she looked utterly beautiful.

"What?" she stipulated when she saw me staring.

I only smiled at her then said: "I think I should change my clothes," I gestured to my rumbled mess.

Bella started to crawl out of bed, "I'll leave."

But I shook my head. "No, you should stay in bed. I'll go change in the bathroom; I'll only be a moment."

I gathered up some clean clothes and walked slowly to the bathroom at the end of the hall, giving me a quiet moment to think alone without Bella's intuition breaking through my charade.

What had just happened? Had all that pain, all that terror been for _nothing_? Had I suffered those unbearable hours without a just reason? So would I be back to normal for now on…well, as normal as a vampire could get? Darkly, I wondered how long I had been in my vegetated state and what the others had done about it. Surely I must have terrified Bella more that what she was showing. Or had I somehow made all that up? Had my sanity finally run out, leaving me to wallow in the pits of insanity? Is that why Aro is the way he is? Because he had lived so long?

Quietly, I opened the door to the tiny bathroom and shut it behind me. There was no use dwelling on something no longer existent. If there was no more pain, who was I to grumble about it? In fact, I should be rejoicing at my relief now, not speculating about it. What a masochistic I was.

With precise speed, I dressed quickly into a collared, buttoned tee shirt and jeans, throwing my discarded clothes in a corner. I didn't bother with shoes; I decided t wear only socks—what was the point? I combed down my unkempt hair with a wet comb then froze when I looked into the mirror.

My eyes, well to be more specific, my irises were a pale gray, no longer the usual gold or black. Like dull pearls, they glared back at me and I spat out a profanity at them, cursing them and myself with no just reason. Unconsciously, I touched the smooth glass and my reflection mimicked me, still scowling deeply. What hadn't my eyes retained their usual color? And why hadn't Bella said anything about them?

Then I pulled my hand away, rolling my eyes and turning away from the mirror—when it hit me. Violent, intense—it was an agony that made what happened before seem like a breeze. Pain hit me like a battering ram, and I gasped for breath. I dropped like a rock to the wood-planked floor and I instinctively rolled into a ball, clenching my eyes shut. Pain raged my entire body. I felt as if my flesh had been neatly filleted and packed with salt; each organ stuffed with burning coals; my bones drilled open and filled with molten lead. It started at the tips of my toes and pushed its way up my veins, like thick, fiery lava. Something like an electrical shock pulsed through me, bursting out from my dead heart and jolting my entire body. The agony drove even deeper, tearing its way through every particle of my body, choking my lungs and blinding me as a red strobe of light exploded in my vision.

_Let me die_! I heard my mind shriek out hysterically. _Let me die!_

I clawed at the wooded floor, as another shock flowed through me, stronger this time and I convulsed, my head buzzing loudly. _Stupid_! I inwardly hissed, banging my fist weakly on the ground out of anger and pain.

A nausea swept into my stomach, overwhelming and potent and the pain faded slightly. I pulled myself to hands and knees, gulping fast as my stomach made a rapid excursion up to my throat. I gave in without a fight, and, much like Addy before, convulsed once than violently vomited a globule of dark blood. It pooled on top of the wood, bubbling acid from my venom. The planks hissed and steamed from it, the color around the edges turning instantly white. My stomach lurched forcefully and the contents of my insides seemed to shove its way out of my throat. I clapped my hands to my mouth but that didn't stop the thick animal blood from gushing out. It spilled in between my fingers, burning as it slid down the length of my arms. Everything I had hunted for the other day, my entire being was now rejecting vehemently and it hurt like _hell. _I swiped at my mouth and a cord of dark blood followed my hand away. The panic, the terror immersed me completely until I was breathing so fast that there wasn't even a point to it. My stomach and abdomen seared and squeezed until I thought I could throw-up no more.

It was as though my entire body was rejecting everything about my existence, about my being and it was now trying to push it all out until I was completely empty of everything within me. My insides contracted in on themselves and I had the feeling of being compressed and unable to breathe. I retched again, this time only venom came up, spotted sparsely with blood. I shivered, the hair on the back of my neck stood on end and a prickling sensation traveled down my shoulders and rounded around to my chest cavity. My back arched. My spine stressed to the snapping point. The flaming feeling continued to thrust its way through me.

"Carlisle!" I coughed, choking, suddenly desperate for my father figure to be near, to offer his familiar assurance, to feel his calming touch on my shoulder. For the first time in a long while I felt completely alone—something I usually didn't mind. "This…isn't…right…!" I banged my fist against the bathroom floor in an effort to alleviate the burning. I'd always hated throwing up when I was a human, when I had been a teenager—I suddenly remembered that. I hated it to the point that the nausea usually had me hyperventilating in a full panic attack before the vomit had even come up. My mother used to come and sit by me and bathe the back of my neck with a cool cloth. That was before she caught the influenza as well.

Weakness was dragging me down and I vaguely felt my head hit the wood. Blistering heat came in waves through my body and the floor suddenly felt icy as it pressed to my bare skin. Desperately I sucked at the oxygen but found I couldn't draw a breath in as blood curdled in my throat. My skin was on fire, melting like wax off my bones. My body crawled with the fire, as though every last synapse, every last cell revolted. _And it should_. A voice whispered in the back of my skull. For one wild, frantic moment, I though I would literally melt into a puddle in the middle of the bathroom and seep through the cracks of the floorboards, disappearing without a trace.

And then the pain faded and the heat cooled. Something unfamiliar, something warm pounded its way through the veins of my body. I was on my stomach, my hand pressing to my chest, my cheek on the planks. My lungs were screaming for a breath of oxygen—something I couldn't give. I continued coughing, gagging, spitting out the last drops of venom and blood. Until I was only gasping for breath.

And then I felt it…it was so foreign yet so natural. So frightening yet so comforting. I felt it against my hand as it was pushed against my chest from the floor and it resonated in my ears and vibrated my chest. Though it was weak, it was the strongest thing I had even heard.

_Thu…ump._

Gasping and shaking and despite everything else, I struggled to hands and knees, my palms sliding in my vomit. My mouth gaped open as I swallowed great gulps of air. Something sticky, clear, and hot dripped from the tip of my nose and slid from behind my ears to my neck, dampening the collar of my shirt. I grappled with the edge of the marble sink, my hands slick.

The throb within my chest increased tenfold, forcing me to breathe faster. I pulled myself up with weak, rubbery arms until I could peer over the top of the sink. Alarm blasted through me with shrill intensity.

Two brilliant, startlingly green eyes stared back at me in terror. They were large and framed with perspiration. Those green eyes stared back at in me in utter perplexity and stricken panic. I dropped back to the floor, oblivious that I was sitting in puke, the ceramic tile was cold even through my clothes. I lifted a hand to my chest and I could feel the thing inside, thumping furiously against my ribcage, like the beat of a drum, fast and hard.

"Oh god…" the voice that escaped my lips was raspy and broken. I closed my eyes and willed myself to breathe deeply and evenly.

"Edward?" there was a hollow knock at the door, startling me, breaking my controlled breathing. It was Bella, I think, but her voice sounded normal. "Edward, are you alright? You've been in there forever."

"I'm fine!" My voice came out strangled and raw with terror. For a moment, Bella didn't answer. I saw the brass knob twist slightly as she fought the lock.

"Are you sure?" she sounded frightened now. "You sound different…do you want me to get Carlisle?"

"I'm fine!" I repeated, my _heart_ pumping spastically in my chest. "Just go away!" I attempted my voice to come out as a growl by only succeeded in sounding maniacal.

I heard the pounding of her footsteps and I knew it wouldn't be long before someone arrived. Trembling and with my knees knocking together, I stood again with the help of the sink and gawked at my reflection in the mirror. My face was stricken and ashen in color. I looked slightly younger with a rougher look about my face and I could even see a hint of freckles sprinkled on my nose. I stared at the wild looking teenage boy in the mirror, sweat shining on his face. Bloody vomit spotted the collar of my once clean shirt and spattered garishly on my front, my chest heaved laboriously and my nostrils flared.

I moaned, staring with numb, horrified fixation at the human in the mirror. Nauseating spurts of what felt like adrenaline spurted through my veins. I couldn't believe my eyes—this couldn't be happening to me—someone or something must be standing behind me. Without thinking, I pressed a palm against the cold glass and my reflection imitated me flawlessly.

A sudden, hard knocking sent me leaping about a foot in the air. "Edward?" demanded a musical voice. "Edward, what are you doing in there?" It was Carlisle—his velvet-sounding voice upset.

"Go away!" My voice broke as I said this. What would he say when he saw me like this? Would he kick me out? Would he totally reject me? I grew angry and anxious at the same time at that thought.

"Edward, don't make me break down the door."

I didn't respond to that; I looked back at the mirror, my eyes picking out a faded scar right under my chin. As I leaned closer, my breath fogged the glass, clouding out my reflection for a brief moment.

"_Edward_!"

Slowly, as my body was engulfed in numbing shock, I stepped away from the mirror and sank to the floor, like a man ran through with a sword, my hand leaving behind a bloody-print on the mirror. I closed my eyes, silently coaching myself not to lose it. Instinctively, I raised a hand to my chest and waited, feeling the pulse beneath my skin.

_Thump, thump. _


	7. Chapter 7

**Okay, i had really struggled with this chapter so please don't shoot me if you don't like it---constructive criticism is perfectly fine with me---if you don't like it, tell me why and what you think might improve it. If all you tell is that you don't like it then i'm totally disregarding your review. I did try my best and I promise it will get better again. Read and review!!**

_"Tell me why you hunt animals instead of people," she said, her voice sounded near desperation. I felt a slight twinge of resentment in my stomach and answered in a low voice._

_ "I don't _want_ to be a monster."_

Wooden splinters, ice cold hands. Carlisle was dragging me from the bathroom, lifting me away from the blood. And I heard voices, loud, frightened, angry. It was as though someone had pressed the fast forward button on the remote, leaving me in slow motion. The slivers of wood spilled out into the hall and there was blood-a lot of blood-I reeked of it. It was hot and sticky between my fingers. It had stained through my white collar shirt and splattered on my jeans.

"Esme!"

It sounded like Carlisle's voice...it could have been Carlisle's voice-but it was too hauntingly melodic and compelling. But when I opened my eyes, there he was, bending over me, his features the picture of an angel, too perfect from what I remembered.

"Shock," he was saying, "He's going into shock."

_"Tell me why..."_

_ "I don't _want_ to be a monster."_

There was chaos-shouts and demands and crying, someone was crying-coughing in between sobs. There were voices, echoing in my head, compressing my brain. Broken sentences, cut off words, all entwining together-it didn't make any sense. And I was lying in the midst of it all, on the planked floor of the hallway as others stepped over me, crowding me like an attraction at the zoo. A chilled hand was on my forehead while another pressed against my neck. I shivered. White faces hovered over me and I vaguely wondered if they were ghosts. Maybe I was dead or dying and this was the heaven Bella always told me about.

"I need my bag, Esme," Carlisle was speaking so fast, far above my head, I could barely catch the words. He repeated: "He's going into shock."

Who was going into shock?

_ "Aren't you concerned about my diet?" I asked, unable to keep the blatant sarcasm from dripping off my words. _

_ "Oh," She murmured softly, looking away, "that."_

_ "Yes that," my voice was bleak. The next words came out forced. "Don't you want to know if I drink blood?" _

Shock? Someone was going into shock. Who was going into shock? I didn't get to find out-only seconds later I smelled the heady stench of alcohol, though not as intense as what it used to be, but still pungent to my nose.

"This is going to help you relax, Edward," Carlisle's soft, eloquently musical voice compelled me to open my eyes and I saw his hair glinting gold in the lights of the hall. In his hand, he brandished a hypodermic needle, clear liquid dribbling down the long, silver piece. "This is going to burn-don't tense your muscles." Then I felt the sting and flinched, but ice, stone-like hands kept me immobile as he injected the sedative into my arm and I could feel fluid rush in then the careful, slow release of a syringe. I managed to roll over before I retched.

"Ugh!" a loud voice exclaimed. "Gross!"

"Everyone just back up, please! Give me some space...give me some space!" It was Carlisle's voice again; he was angry.

My world floated...like a wisp of gray cloud snatched up by the wind and flung into a dark night. I felt trapped, like a bird caught helpless in the core of a storm and I could feel my heart flutter frantically as it tried to regain balance. I tried to lift my head, to speak, to tell everyone that I was going to be alright, that this was all a misunderstanding. But I could only breathe...in...out...desperate to placate my body's demand for more oxygen-something I couldn't supply good enough.

The floor vanished out from under me.

_ "We try," I explained slowly, enunciating each word. "We're usually very good at what we do. Sometimes we make mistakes..."_

_ "Even the strongest of us fall of the wagon, don't we?"_

_ "What are asking me? My permission?" her voice came out sharp, startling me. "I mean, is there no hope, then?"_

_ But there had to be hope._

I stared dazedly at the ceiling, watching a spindled-legged spider slowly pick its way across the ridges of the uneven wood, in no hurry to get where ever it was going. Distantly, I heard the thrum of the sleeted rain beating against the shuttered window and the incessant ticking of the clock on the bedside table. I lay as still as I could, willing the bed beneath me to stop heaving and my stomach to stop pitching within me; I swallowed back the nausea and closed my eyes. I felt strangely disembodied and dreamlike as the shock sank deeper within me.

_Human. _The word sent a prickling sensation down my spine and my arms blossomed with rows of goosebumps. Another wave of shock made my newborn heart perform paroxysms in my chest, giving me the impression of being on a rollercoaster when the sudden dip sends your insides rolling up while the rest of you plummets down.

_I don't want to be a monster._

I closed my eyes and drifted. What was going to happen now? Would I be discarded by the only family I had known for over a hundred years? Without the speed, the agility, and the sharp awareness of those around me...would Bella be able to still accept me, even when I couldn't protect her like before?

Maybe I wasn't even human...maybe my vampire instincts were only fading slightly because of what that thing had done...by tomorrow everything will go back to the way things were, wouldn't that be the best for everyone..?

_What was I thinking?_ Being human is something almost any vampire would willing give anything for-being human would finally allow me to cross that distance that neither Bella or I could have ever fill in. _I didn't want to be a monster anymore._

I opened my eyes again, fighting the drug. Carlisle's head was bent over me and I felt his cold fingers pressed against my wrist and I could see him counting my pulse. He saw my eyes open and frowned in what seemed to be puzzlement.

"Edward, why don't you close your eyes-try counting down from ten."

"No," I mumbled drunkenly, stubbornly, attempting to pull my wrist away from his chilled hand. Even though my head was whirling, I could still grasp at reality and I realized the drug Carlisle had injected in me hadn't been powerful enough, that I still retained some of my old strength.

_"I'm the world's best predator, aren't I? Everything about me invites you in-my voice, my face, even my _smell. _As if I need any of that!"_

I closed my eyes and shivered and listened to the sound of my heart pulsate through my head, steady and unrelenting. Carlisle's hand dropped my wrist and I heard the scooting of a chair as he stood. Only moments later, I felt a second burn as the tip of a needle slid beneath my skin and I felt the fluid, once again, rush into my arm, flooding me with another wave of grogginess.

But I continued to fight.

_"It took everything I had not to jump up in the middle of that class full of children and-" I stopped abruptly, looking away from Bella's wide eyes. "When you walked past me, I could have ruined everything Carlisle has built for us, right then and there. If hadn't been denying my thirst for the last, well, too many years, I wouldn't have been able to stop myself." I paused then and scowled at the trees, feeling utterly disgusted with myself._

_ I glanced back at Bella after a few moments and studied her grimly; she was remembering as well. "You must have thought I was possessed."_

_ Bella winced. "I couldn't understand why. How you could hate me so quickly..."she trialed off._

_ "To me, it was like you were some kind of demon, summoned straight from my own personal hell to ruin me. The fragrance coming off your skin...I thought it would make me deranged that first day. In that one hour, I thought of a hundred different ways to lure you from the room with me, to get you alone. And I fought each back, thinking of my family, what I could do to them. I had to run out, to get away before I could speak the words that would make you follow..."_

_ I looked up from under my lashes to stare at her staggered expression. I could feel my eyes darken from the bitter memories. "You would have come," I promised._

_ "Without a doubt."_

A winter-like hand brushed my temple. "You need to let go, Edward, stop fighting it." A gentle, woman's voice soothed my senses and icy lips brushed my forehead.

I groaned, struggling to keep my eyes from shutting permanently. The room had become a swamp of color and lights, dancing and shimmering with no distinct lines or shapes.

"This is making me nervous, Esme," Carlisle whispered, his voice sounding as though it came from the other side of a thick-plated window. "I don't want to give him any more. I might kill him."

How could he kill me? That was silly-I was already dead.

***

A cool, marble surface pressed gently to my forehead; it was soothing, tender, easing away the restless dreams tangled in my darkness. A voice, familiar and warm, murmured close to my ear, crowding out the cloudiness and bringing me forth into a dimly lit room. At first, everything was just a blur of colors and shapes, surreal and unfamiliar. My head thudded dully, creating pressure along my temple. I closed my eyes to sink back into the black lake of oblivion, unwilling to bring the world to sharp focus yet no matter who was waiting on the other side. But the voice was persistent, like the buzz of an alarm clock, pushing back unconsciousness, not allowing me to slip under again.

I blinked once, twice and everything swirled back into focus and I found myself looking into a pair of concerned, golden eyes. I blinked again, even though there was little light, it still stung my groggy eyes and I had to squint.

"Bella..." I spoke faintly, slowly as though drugged. I tried to lift my head but it seemed to weigh a thousand pounds. Maybe I _was _drugged.

"No," the voice contradicted soothingly, "It's Carlisle. Can you tell me how're you are feeling?"

"_Like Hell_..." I mumbled in response, closing my eyes once more.

"Maybe you didn't give him enough." A sweet soprano voice lulled the air on the other side of me, quiet, anxious. _He looks awful..._

"He was fighting the medication more than _humanly _possible. I injected him with enough to put out an entire town." Carlisle's voice sounded troubled. _It was more out of impulse than anything._ "Anymore would surely be fatal in his current state. I doubt there's any venom left in him, I'm sure he coughed the rest up this morning."

"Where is everybody else?" the doctor added in a murmur, speaking to the other standing in the room.

"Rosalie's off having some sort of fit, Esme's trying to calm Bella who is hyperventilating. Jasper is there, too, attempting to calm down the atmosphere and...."

There was a pause then: "It looks as though Emmett's off finding Rosalie. But he'll be trying to come in here soon. I'd say about five minutes." _Pretty sure...kill Edward._

I shook my head, attempting to clear away the buzz of noise seeping in and out of my mind. I lifted my arm to swipe at my damp face and felt a sickening tug. I looked down. An IV was tapped to the inside of my elbow, pumping clear, bubbled fluid into my veins.

"Carlisle?" I grumbled, still light-headed, reaching my left hand to yank out the contraption. "What is this _damn_ thing in me?"

_At...he recognizes..._ "Try not to do that, Edward, you're dehydrated." Carlisle reprimanded me, gently snatching back my hand. _...try to sedate...aga- _

"Dehy-wha'?" I garbled out.

"Edward, relax, everything's going to be just fine."

_Human...?...why...I want...see..._

"Emmett, please just give us some space. I don't want anyone in here right now." Carlisle had stood up, facing the other end of the room.

_What...not...fa- _

"Alice gets to stay in here!" _lice...gets...verythin..._  
I tried to crane my neck to look at him, but I couldn't find enough strength to break through the drugged cloud enough to do it. The slamming of a door sent me jolting and I heard someone stomping away.

_...ways...over...re...ting..._

"Ow," I groaned, making an effort to shield my ears from the annoying bits of voices I kept hearing.

"I don't think he's quite human yet," the sweet voice spoke again.

"Try to sedate him again, Carlisle, I doubt it will hurt him. I'm thinking he can probable still hear bits of our thoughts...which has to mean he still has some vampire still within him-"

"Though it is definitely not a dominate part." Carlisle was hesitant.

Good. I didn't want some needle sticking out of me anyways.

"But...it might be a good idea."

And then, for the thousandth time, I felt a needle being injected into my skin, followed by the sensation of falling backwards. For a moment, I was able to cling to the edge and I listened as the last of the voices speaking softly, brokenly in my head slowly faded into nothing, leaving me blank and clear. It was then that I let go.

_I didn't want to be a monster._

***

A tremendous crash jolted me awake. My eyes flew open and I stared into an inky blackness. I heard my own breathing, deep and even; I saw nothing that could have created such a noise. I was in a bed, covered by a thick comforter. I pulled my hand out from under the blanket and rubbed my chest where it was sore.

I froze, a mixture of panic and wonder spreading through me. Beneath my hand, a throb pulsed fast-like the beat of a frantic drummer hidden beneath my skin. As my emotions skyrocketed, the throb grew rapid and it echoed in my ears and pounded in my head. I rolled over and buried my face in the pillow, unwilling to face the world quite yet and foolishly afraid of what I might see. I felt the sickening tug of an IV still taped to the inside of my right elbow and I grimaced.

Another crash sounded, followed by a cat-like screech reverberated from below. I sat up quickly, the blanket falling from my shoulder.

"Edward?"

I jumped and rolled over again, this time dumping myself onto the wooden floor.

_Ooff! _The air was blasted from my lungs and it took several moments for me to breathe again.

Icy hands, like stones in the dead of winter, grasped my arms. They lifted me with ease and deposited me gently back on the bed. There was a click and a flood of yellow light filled the small bedroom, momentarily blindly me. When I could see again, I found Carlisle bedside, dressed loosely in a light blue tee-shirt and slacks. There was another scream but he didn't even flinch.

"Are you alright?" Carlisle asked softly, his voice sounding strangely melodic. When I gave him no answer, he smiled warmly and said, "How're you feeling?"

My only response was to blink; my heart began to beat faster. Finally: "What happened?"

Carlisle only studied me, taking in my rumpled appearance. He looked extremely pale, his dark eyes shadowed with deep-bruise like circles. In the light of the porcelain lamp, his blond hair glittered gold. He didn't say anything, just watched me with unreadable eyes. His hard gaze kept me frozen like a deer caught in the glare of headlights. Then his features softened. "To be entirely honest," he hesitated briefly, speaking in a calculating voice. "I'm not entirely sure" his dark, honey eyes assessed me again with concern. "Do you remember?"

I swallowed and averted my eyes from his ancient ones. I pressed a hand to my chest and felt my heart thudding against my ribs. "Human?" I whispered, looking back at the flawless man.

His face was gentle. "It seems that way," he watched me, waiting for a response.

I remained silent, thinking intensely about this. "The rest?"

He knew what I meant, "there are mixed feelings."

I looked down, frowning; I noticed the IV stuck in my arm. I began to pick at the medical tape. "I don't know whether to be extremely happy or extremely devastated."

Carlisle laughed quietly. "I can think of many vampires, Edward, who would give anything to be in your shoes at this moment."

I thought about that as I began to peel the tape away from my arm. "I'm not a vampire anymore."

"Don't do that," Carlisle reprimanded me, his hand capturing my wrist and pulling my hand away.

"Why," I grouched. "It's bothering me."

He chuckled again and began to fiddle with the IV stand next to the bed. Then he turned back to me and with one, swift motion, he unpeeled the medical tape and slid the tube away from my arm.

I gasped at the strange sensation and glared at my appendage. "There's a hole in my arm," I accused, rubbing at the scratchy part.

"It will heal." The doctor promised.

I grumbled and threw the blanket off of me, swinging my legs over the edge of the bed. "What about Bella?" I asked without looking at him. "Where is she? How is she reacting to all this?"

"I haven't delved into any specific details with her. I figured I'd leave that to you."

"Thanks." I said sarcastically. I was surprised I was taking this all in as calmly as I was. Maybe humans _were_ good at suppressing bad emotions. Or maybe the shock hadn't hit me yet. I stood tentatively and found that my legs felt rubbery and sore. "Who was that screaming?" I asked, using the bedpost for support as I stretched my calf muscles.

"What screaming?"

I turned to see Carlisle watching me with an innocent expression, his arms crossed casually across his chest. For a minute I believed him-how couldn't I? But the moment I looked away, I remembered that I would use that same look for Bella whenever I tried to convince her of something she didn't believe.

I turned slowly back around, narrowing my eyes. "I'm not stupid, Carlisle. Someone was screaming."

Carlisle grimaced. "It was Rosalie. She's not very happy right now."

Now that was sugar coating it. But I decided I didn't want to press it forward because I could feel the beginnings of my first headache swelling across my forehead. "My stomach hurts-is there a reason for that?" I snapped, still feeling grumpy.

"You're hungry."

"_Hungry_?" I said the word as though I was speaking a foreign language.

Carlisle smiled as though he just thought of something funny and motioned for me to wait. "I'll be back, Edward. I think there might be something in that fridge down in the kitchen."

He shut the door on his way out. It was only then, when I was left alone in the bedroom, left standing by the bed, it was only then that I let the panic take over. I turned in a slow three-sixty until I came to a broad mirror, glaring white where the light of the lamp hit it. A boy, no older than sixteen or seventeen, stared back at me with startling green eyes and a sparse sprinkling of cinnamon freckles dotting his nose. He was somewhat on the lanky side, yet muscle still made itself known along his upper arms. His hair, gleaming a coppery bronze, stuck up all over his head.

I touched the mirror and sighed-the only thing I could manage to do, the only response I could manage without fully losing it. A strange, numbing relief swept through me, as though I had been in pain for the past hundred years and the pressure had just now finally been released, allowing me to breathe again.

I wasn't a monster anymore.

***

_Boom!_ With deafening intensity, the thunder rolled through the mountains as steady as a freight train. Leading the way, brilliant veins of lightning cracked the darkening sky like a whip. We both jumped and Bella dropped the chess piece she had been about to set down-it landed on the cardboard with a gentle thud.

"That's one thing I hate about it here-there's no end to the dreariness." Bella complained. "It's either raining, raining, or snowing."

I didn't answer, I only stared the chess board, a finger to my lip in thought. The cabin was empty, except for us. Apparently, Carlisle had found the house empty when he went to the refrigerator (which only contained a pack of sardines two years over their due date). So he went out hunting and for human food, assuring me and Bella that we were safe and that he wouldn't be very far away. Besides, he had said, we're in the middle of nowhere-what could happen?

Bella had done very well, considering my current state. It only took her five seconds to regain her composure, and then she went into full throttle trying to make me feel comfortable and _normal_. I didn't bother to tell her that I already felt normal enough.

"Check mate." Suddenly, Bella planted her queen right next to mine like a victory flag and beamed at me from across the board.

"You cheated," I accused, tilting my head to scrutinize her handy work.

"Shush!" she waved an annoyed hand at me. "This is a commemorative occasion-one that should not be taken lightly. Give me a moment to forever engrain this into my memory."

I raised an eyebrow at her in a questioning slant. "What on earth are you talking about, Bella?"  
Her brown eyes widened as though it was the plainest thing in the world. "Do you realize, Edward, that this is the first time I have beaten you in anything?"

"I just wasn't paying attention."

"Oh, whatever." She stuck her tongue at me and swept the chess pieces into a pile. "You want to play again?"

Another crack of lightening illuminated the curtains of the windows. The light bulbs flickered then blinked out, plunging me and Bella into complete darkness.

"Great," I said gruffly, carefully rising to my feet. "Stay where you are Bella, I'll find some candles to light."

Bella was quiet; I heard her moving across the wooden planks.

"Bella," I said with an exasperated sigh. I heard the swish of curtains just as I found a match and a candle. I struck it to life and lit the wick, watching as the wax began to dribble. I turned, and, in the warm glow of the candle, I saw the side of Bella's face. She was standing at the window near the door, her skin orange in the fire.

"Have you seen this?" she asked me in a hushed voice and motioned me to join her. I obliged and peered out of pane of glass. The wind screamed and howled outside, like a raging beast. The rain beat upon the glass, like fists, as though someone was trying to force their way inside the house. The trees whipped their branches and leaves skyrocketed past, spinning and cart wheeling in the air. "It's kinda scary."

"It's just a storm, Bella."

"But storms can hurt you."

"If you're foolishly out in them."

"And if you're in houses, too." Bella quickly retorted. "They can set the house on fire or blow it down."

"I refuse to argue about this, with you. It's petty."

"Then why are you?"

The shattering of glass brought us both to an abrupt halt. In the candle light, we both gaped at each other; I was holding my breath and I released it slowly.

"Did you hear that?" Bella whispered, drawling closer to me.

"Maybe it was the wind," I swallowed dryly.

"That's what they say in movies all the time." Bella said softly, clutching my arm tightly. "Yet it's never true."

"Bella, stay here," I demanded, breaking away and making my way carefully towards the kitchen, where the source of the noise came from. Cautiously, I bent down and lifted a discarded broom.

"What, are you going to sweep him away?" Bella asked from behind me, her voice dripping with sarcasm. I ignored her. There were several, blinding flashes of lightning and the room lit up like strobe lights. As though accepting a challenge, thunder let out a loud roar of fury making me want to clap my hands over my ears. I went deeper into the darkness, away from the candle light and down the small hall that led to the compact kitchen. My heart thumped furiously inside my chest and I realized I was breathing loudly. I felt ridiculous. Only humans acted this way. Wait-I was a human. I winced with each creak and groan of the floor boards and wondered how I could step any lighter than I already was.

A cold hand touched my arm and I let out a very human sounding growl. "Didn't I tell you to stay put?" I turned around saw nothing but darkness. "Bella?" my fists tightened around the handle of the broomstick. I began to move back towards her, towards the flickering glow of the candle.

My foot caught the back of the chair and I went sprawling with a clatter, my broom slid from my fingers. "Ow!" I gasped, clutching my throbbing elbow.

A jagged streak of lightening blazed across the sky and the room lit up with white. What I saw sent me into mind reeling shock. Bella let out a blood-curdling scream a second after the candle blew out, jerking me back to life. I went to jump to my feet, groping for the broom and cracked my head against the underside of the porcelain counter of the reading table. Pain seared down my spine and I fell back, clutching my head where it hurt. _A weapon...I need a weapon... _ I got on hands and knees and felt the floor, searching for something hard and heavy.

"_Edward!_" Bella screeched and there was a loud crash.

I spun my body around and once again I whacked my head on the wooden leg of a coffee table and I saw a spiral of stars. I heard Bella struggling somewhere in front on me but I couldn't get my brain to cooperate with me. Her terrified screams intensified until the house echoed, sounding like a thousand wailing ghosts. I shook my head and rolled onto my side and my hand brushed the broadside of a glass plate. I snatched it up, without thinking about hitting Bella; I picked up the heavy glass and flung it with everything I had.

A piercing scream ran my blood cold. Something clawed at the wood, snarling angrily.

I staggered to my feet and blundered through the dark. _Find Bella. _My mind was telling me. _Do not leave without her. _I knocked over another chair and I fell to the ceramic tiles which told me I was in the kitchen. Mentally mapping out the cabin, I vaguely remembered there was a back door going left from the refrigerator. Now where was the refrigerator?

I shrieked as hands, cold and rough, grabbed my arms and yanked my hair. My head snapped back and I hit the floor, entangled in arms and legs. I grappled with the air; fighting and kicking against whatever had hold of me.

They had pinned me to the ground, their strength was like steel. A heavy hand clamped down on the side of my skull. I wrenched violently, desperate to free myself from the iron grasp. I grabbed at whatever my hands could wrap around, trying to pull myself free, yelling out profanities. It was becoming harder to drawl in a breath of air. Suddenly, a vicious, terrifying snarl grated across the room and the weight suddenly disappeared. I wiggled my way across the floor and jumped to my feet.

"BELLA!"

Something hit me from behind and I was sent face first into the planked floor. Dizzy and nauseated, I struggled to my hands and knees, blood spurting from my nose and running into my mouth. Spitting and gasping, I tried to feel my way around, away from whatever was attacking me. Something connected with my side and I was sent crashing against cabinets.

Thunderous growls erupted from all around me-I was so disoriented and confused that I could have been in China from all I knew. I heard the splitting of wood and the crashing of chairs-something shrieked from pain and there was the sound of breaking glass and I felt the shards rain down on me. My consciousness was slipping-I felt horribly helpless. If I had been a vampire, I would've been able to hold my ground and protect Bella. The noise suddenly stopped.

Cold hands grabbed me roughly; they shook me violently, stealing the breath from my lungs. "Is he dead? Is he dead?"

Lights flared and I was blinded by a streak of yellow.

"He will be if you keep shaking him like that. Addy-stop!"

Carlisle yanked Addy's tiny form away from me and he crouched down next to me. His shirt was torn and muddied; droplets of water shimmered in his golden hair and shimmied down his pale face. "Are you all right?" he asked, helping me sit up. "Where does it hurt?" Behind him, I saw Emmett and Alice, still and unmoving, carvings stuck in the middle of the destroyed kitchen.

Slowly, I lifted a hand to my face and touched it softly, checking to see if I was still intact. My finger tips came away bloodied red.

"I'm _bleeding_."


	8. Chapter 8

_ There was a woman-her sheets were twisted around her rail-thin body, her skin was gray and shined with glittering sweat. Her bronze colored hair, damp and matted, spilled over the lumpy pillow and over the edge of the bed's skinny mattress. Her eyes rolled under her blue-veined lids, her fingers twitched and dried, yellow vomit stained her covers. A man bent over her, a stethoscope hanging from his neck, his face pulled into a worried frown. He gently grasped her hand and spoke quiet, soothing words to her ear._

_ She mumbled something unintelligible and pulled her hand from his. Her eyes flickered open; they were like deep emeralds at the bottoms of clear waters, shimmering from unshed tears._

_ "Edward..." she said, her voice barely a whisper. "Edward..."_

_ She tried to rise her head, she tried raising herself up into a sitting position but it was a futile effort._

_ "Edward..." she repeated her cracked voice somewhat stronger this time. "Edward..."_

"Edward..." someone was shaking me by the shoulders, pulling me up from a lake of slumber and I could feel myself surfacing, my dreams scattering like dust in the wind. "Edward, wake up!"

I opened my eyes groggily; feeling disoriented and pushed back the covers from my sweating body. "What's going on?" I mumbled, blinking fast as I sat up. Bella was on her knees next to me on the mattress, her hair frazzled. She was still wearing the shirt Carlisle let her borrow. She smiled at me.

"We're going home-we're leaving now," she informed me quietly, dark locks of her hair falling over her shoulder. I looked towards the window. Twilight was barely ending; the sun was just now peeking over the horizon, rubbing the cloud sleepers from its eyes. Thick fog wove misty patterns through the trees. It was just too early.

The sleep dust was still gathered under _my_ eyes and I groaned, letting myself fall back against the pillow. "_Now_?"

Bella gave a short laugh and rested her head on my chest. "Now you know how I feel most of the time these days."

I grumbled and closed my heavy eyelids, willing the darkness to suck me in again. All I needed was five more minutes of sleep. That was all I needed to break through this fog I was in.

"Edward?"

I opened my eyes slowly and Bella was pulling herself away from me, her expression troubled. In the dim light of the room, I saw tears sparkling in her eyes. One managed to escape and it dripped down onto the comforter, leaving a tiny stain.

"Bella, love, what's wrong?" I asked gently, using my thumb to catch another tear clinging to the edge of her jaw.

She let out a hoarse laugh in spite of herself and swiped at her damp face, pulling away from my hand. I sat up and waited in concern, ignoring the dizzy spell that followed. She fidgeted nervously, keeping her eyes from my gaze.

"Bella, what is it?" I asked when she didn't say anything and I wrapped my arms around her and cradled her against me, resting my cheek against her soft hair.

Her voice came out as a barely a whisper and I had to strain myself to hear her. "I can hear you heart." She pressed a hand against my chest and said nothing else, her body tense as she felt the life beating steadily within me.

Than Bella pulled away again, rubbing her eyes. "I guess it didn't really hit me yesterday-the shock and all..." she paused briefly to drag in a shaky breath; she looked faint, "and now-it's just-just too much...too much to take in...I guess it really hit me when I saw you bleeding..." she looked down in her lap, her fingers working the sheets nervously.

I sat in silence as well, a battle raging within me. I couldn't think of something to say. I, myself, was still trying to overcome the shock myself, the fearing of actually meeting my family face to face. Fear of judgment, I guessed, or of being rejected. I sighed deeply and counted slowly back from ten before reopening my eyes.

"Bella," I murmured, using the tip of my finger to tilt her chin so I could look her in the eyes. They were wide and still glistening with tears. "I'm still the same Edward I was before. I still love you more than anything in this world; you're still my Bella." I hesitated, than added: "I'm just a bit more, well, vulnerable than I once was."

Bella smiled faintly at that, "I know." The blood rushed to her cheeks turning them a bright pink.

I lowered my face so that the tip of our noses touched and I tilted my head. Bella closed her eyes and our lips grazed gently where we lingered for a several moments.

The door suddenly opened and we jerked apart in surprise. Carlisle was standing there, looking sheepish. "I'm sorry, I should have knocked."

Both Bella and I looked at each other, still startled from the sudden interruption.

"That's okay," Bella said first, scratching at the sutures still holding her neck wound together, her face red again. I noticed that her black eyes that had resulted from the blow to her nose had faded.

"Are we leaving now?" I asked, looking away from Bella and to my father figure, trying to fill the sudden awkward silence. "Can I at least take a shower?"

"He definitely needs it," Bella added. "No offense."

"None taken," I rolled my eyes at her. She beamed.

Carlisle checked his watch with a flash of his honey gold eyes and nodded. "Make it quick," he smiled and turned back to the door, opening it softly and disappearing without a sound, allowing the door to shut behind him.

***

The hot water was heaven as it beat upon my back. It soothed my aching muscles and relaxed the jumble of thoughts bouncing like ping-pongs around in my head. I stood still for several minutes, staring at the rivulets the water made as it hit the floor of the porcelain tub. I closed my eyes and tried to remember what my dream had been about before Bella had woke me. I haven't had such a dream in so long it was still a bit shocking and I had to take in some deep breaths to keep my seemingly untamed heart calm.

My family had come to mine and Bella's rescue last night. Their timing was impeccable and Addy assured me that if they had been even a minute later I would have been dead. I thanked her for the remark and shed away from her, her presence causing me a feeling of unease. It seemed as though the thing had fled the moment everyone had arrived, caught off guard and frightened, unwilling to fight the numbers suddenly present. Bella had been left unharmed: except for a few scraps, she got off pretty well. That thing must have it really in for me or I must have made it really mad without my knowing of it.

I shut off the spout of steaming water and brushed aside the plastic curtain, snatching the white towel from the hook. Beside from being clean, the shower had relatively done me no good. I still felt achy and feeble and I longed to lie down, letting the surreal hands of unconsciousness get their grip and drag me down into a pool of utter oblivion.

I stood with my face buried in the towel, letting the moisture drip from body and pool on the tiles, spotless despite my blood rejection just yesterday morning. I could feel my head pounding with each beat of my heart, it throbbed and pulsed with burning pain.

"I thought a shower was supposed to help you," I groaned to myself, pulling the towel away from my face and reaching for my clean clothes resting on the closed toilet. The mirror was fogged so I couldn't see my reflection and the air was steamy. I pulled on a pair of jeans and a clean white tee-shirt than pulled on my blue hooded sweatshirt, grateful that someone gave me the courtesy of washing it. It smelled clean and fresh and felt soft over my body. Slipping on a pair of tennis shoes, I unlocked the new bathroom door and glanced up and down the narrow hall for any sign of life...or vampire. I saw nothing.

When I peered into my bedroom, Bella was gone and the bed was made, the corners of the covers neatly turned down. The shutters had been shut and lamps unplugged. I shut the door and sighed, gathering up the courage that had suddenly fled me. I padded as soft as I could down the staircase, hearing the collection of voices gathered in the living room. I hesitated on the bottom step, my heart thumping in my throat.

"Edward!"

I jumped and saw tiny Addy, with her curly dark hair, grinning at me. She had appeared literally out of nowhere, almost knocking me off balance. I pressed a hand to my chest as though to catch my heart which had suddenly broke into a sprint.

"_Shh_!" I shook a finger and glared at her, feeling annoyed.

She held a hand to her mouth and gave a muffled giggle. "I'm sorry." Her pale red eyes watched me unwaveringly as I tread away from the stairway and to the living room like a lamb to the slaughter. My entire family was there, waiting for me. Alice and Esme were sitting causally on the couch. Jasper stood by the window and Emmett sat in the overstuffed arm chair. Carlisle was moving slowly towards me, his ever present smile warm on his face. Rosalie was standing by the door, her arms crossed over her chest and a horrific glare darkening her face. I looked away quickly and tried to focus on Carlisle, forcing in deep breaths. Never had I felt so panicked before in the presence of my family and I was suddenly desperate for Bella.

"Hey, human boy," Emmett crowed, grinning at me with a set of brilliant white teeth. "How's it going?"

"Shut-up," I snapped at him, shooting a sneer his direction. But my cheeks were flaming with embarrassment at his quip.

"Leave him be, Emmett," Alice waved a hand his direction and stood, dancing gracefully over to my spot. "You're just jealous."

Jasper was watching me curiously, keeping his distance. I suddenly realized that I was now a target too-someone he had to struggle to be around. Just as Bella has been for the past almost three years, I know had to be as careful as possible lest one wrong move would send me spiraling for death. The thought made me feel extremely uneasy. I felt a calm wave wash over me and I knew it couldn't be trusted. I eyed him balefully; he only offered me a faint smile.

I could say I was going literally insane, with my family staring at me with wonder in their eyes. My mind was clear of their thoughts-it was almost a scary feeling without constant silent comments echoing in my head. I felt very open, like my brain would just flutter away without its usual anchor. I wanted to know what they were thinking, how they were taking this all in. It was extremely frustrating. I had grown used to not being able to know Bella's thoughts but now it was everyone and I would be constantly guessing for now on. It felt too _normal_ for my taste.

"He looks pale, Carlisle," Esme fussed, following Alice's footsteps to hover near me. Her motherly instincts had gone to hyper drive-I could see that and a sudden vision of my days to come under her care flashed before my eyes. I internally groaned.

"I think he looks kinda green." Emmett corrected with a snicker. "Haven't you thrown up enough, already, Edward?"

Carlisle shot him a deadly look that almost made me shudder before he turned to me and placed his icy hands on my shoulders. I flinched.

"We'll stop on the way and get something for you and Bella to eat. Are you feeling dizzy?"

I didn't like the attention and I scowled. "I have a headache, if that means anything to you."

"You're blood sugar's low," the doctor observed. "It won't be long before we can get some food in your system."

A warm hand suddenly entwined with mine and I saw Bella standing next to me, a comforting smile on her heart-shaped face. She could feel my stress and she gave my hand a tight squeeze as though to say 'relax!'.

Alice was already heading towards the door. "I saw a small diner about a half-hour's drive up the road." She opened the door and a jet of blistering wind clawed its way in. It was snowing again and the sun had disappeared behind a gray-white blanket of clouds and the world outside had darkened once more. I shivered and tucked my chin to my neck for warmth, wishing I had a thick coat to put on. "We should get going-we'll be home before dark if we leave now." No one could doubt Alice.

Home. Just the thought of it brought a home-sick ache in the pit of my stomach. It was Alice who had brought up the fact of returning home. _If it's not safe here, _she had said. _Than It's not going to be safe anywhere else. We might as well go home._ I agreed with her whole-heartedly-well as whole hearted as you could get while hanging over a toilet vomiting.

I grimaced at that thought. The moment I saw the bright blood on my hand from my nose, was the moment that I threw-up mucus all over Carlisle's front. The man had brushed it off, saying that he had had worst things thrown on him in the emergency room. That didn't help my utter humiliation though. He had said it was because my body was stressed, Esme had said it was high-strung nerves (I've always been a high-strung person, she had added), and Addy had suggested that I was dying. We all ignored her.

Carlisle helped me and Bella into the red jeep which was miraculously clean as well and got in the driver's seat, turning the heat on full blast. Bella and I huddled to together and I pulled my hood up over my head, flinching as she wrapped her cold hands around my left hand. Alice got in next to me, smirking about something I couldn't know, and Esme climbed into the front. The rest were going on foot and would meet us up at the house this evening. I cringed at the thought of seeing Rosalie again and facing her wrath. According to Bella, she was not too happy about my transformation.

The thirty minutes flew by; I had fallen asleep most of the duration of the drive. Carlisle had driven slower than usual because the snow had pasted the roads thickly and came down in white sheets making it impossible to see-for me anyways. Alice had grumbled a couple times about the progress we were making saying that _if we went any slower, we would start going backwards. _Carlisle had finally silence her with an almost serious glare. But we made it to the diner in due time and Carlisle slowed when we saw the large yellow sign crowned with a layer of snow

Bella and I jumped from the jeep and we trudged our way towards the small diner, both of us sighing with relief when we hit the heated-warm air inside. I stomped out my feet at the entrance and pushed the hood back from my face. Bella mimicked me and unbuttoned her jacket and pulled off her gloves.

"Go ahead and find yourself a seat!" Someone called to us from the back. Bella took my hand and guided me to a back booth where we slid in next to each other with Esme, Carlisle and Alice across from us.

"Order whatever you like, Bella," Carlisle offered quietly than looked at me. "You too, Edward."

I froze for only a second than gingerly picked up the menu and opened it up, reading the greasy meals with wide eyes. We didn't have food back in the early nineteen hundreds like this and I felt totally clueless as to what to get. I looked over at Bella but she was reading the options without even looking at me.

"Can I start you with something to drink?" A round woman with wild red hair sauntered up to us. Her name tag read Betsy. She eyed Carlisle while chewing a wad of gum.

"Orange juice, please," Bella said.

I looked at her than at Alice across from me, knowing my face looked blank.

"Nothing for the three of us," Alice gestured to her and our two parents. Betsy turned on me.

"What about you, hon?" she asked with a nosy chomp of her gum.

I hesitated again. "Um, same as her, I guess," I pointed a thumb at Bella and the waitress scribbled on her yellow note pad.

"I'll bring it right out."

I went back to studying the menu; scrunching my eyebrows and I picked through the breakfast selection, finding nothing that looked remotely appealing. Cautiously, I peered over the top of the menu and saw that my two parents weren't paying attention to my naiveté. Alice, though, was grinning in amusement. I shot her a camouflaged glare, which she echoed back.

Just then, Betsy returned and plopped down two glasses of thick, yellow liquid in front of me. I handed one to Bella, who immediately sipped hers. I swished it around. It looked awfully thick and pulpy to me.

"Y'all ready to order?"

Bella sat down her menu and smiled politely. "Can I just have some bacon, eggs, and toast?"

"How do you want you eggs?" Betsy chomped out.

"Scrambled."

"And your toast?"

"Wheat, please."

Betsy turned to me. "And you?"

I looked at the slick menu again, my eyes swiveling for something. The chubby waitress blew out a pink bubble and popped it loudly. "Did you want something?" she prodded impatiently. Carlisle, Esme, and Alice watched me, looking as though they were enjoying this immensely.

"Er, I'll have the same thing, er, please,"

"Eggs scrambled?"

"Er...yes."

"Wheat toast?"

"Yes." I set down my menu and slumped in my seat as she walked away, trying to hide my burning face. Carlisle looked as though he was suppressing a smile.

I looked down at my juice again and lifted it carefully, eyeing the substance with an analytical face.

"Edward, you're driving me insane," Alice huffed finally, pushing the table so that the some of the juice splashed over the rim of the plastic glass and onto my hand. "Just take a drink and get it over with. It's not like it'll bite you back."

I glared at her again and lifted the glass to my lips. Bella watched me carefully as I took a sip. It was tangy and sharp but, to my surprise, I liked it. I gulped the rest of it down.

"Pig," Bella teased, giggling as she took another dainty sip of hers. I knocked her elbow just as she lifted the glass and it spilled from her mouth and down the front of her shirt.

"Oops." I raised my eyebrows innocently. "Please excuse my clumsiness; I don't know what came over me." Esme watched our exchange with a beaming smile.

Just then, Betsy popped up again and slid our plates into place. "Enjoy." With that, she waltzed away, chomping her gum like a cow would chew its cud.

Both Bella and I studied our plates.

"So," Bella began. "Aren't you gonna take a bite?"

"What? Am I your guinea pig? If I gag on it, then you know to accidentally knock it to the floor?" I accused

"It does look kinda weird."

Alice sighed.

I shoved my plate at her. "You eat it then." I challenged.

"Just eat the toast, at least," Carlisle said, breaking in as he put his arm around Esme shoulders. "We'll get something more fitting when we get back."

"I don't want to waste your money." Bella said meekly.

All four of us laughed at her and she blushed a bright red.

So we both ate our toast-it was soggy and cold-and Carlisle left enough money on the table to cover the cost and we all exited into the wintry cold, with Betsy the waitress watching us, and we piled into the huge jeep. The heat was turned on high again and I pressed a palm against one of the vents, waiting for the relieving warmth to spread down my arm.

When we were settled and driving down the white road, I leaned my face down near Bella's. "How're you feeling?" I murmured, placing a gentle kiss on the smooth line of her jaw.

"Better." She said, sighing and leaning against me. "What about you?"

"Better." I said with a smile, pulling her close to me. I kissed again, this time on her reddened cheek. She closed her eyes and settled into a doze. I rested my head against the back of the vinyl seat and closed my eyes as well, feeling the warmth of Bella's breath heating my neck.

We spent the next hour in comfortable silence, with Alice humming a gentle tune and with Bella curled up against me. I sleepily watched the chalky white world whiz past without really seeing it. I was lost in my own thoughts and uncertainties. My family seemed to have accepted me without much fault-well, everyone except Rosalie. But Carlisle must had talked with them though, before seeing me, so their initial shock must had faded by the time I met up with them in the living room. Bella seemed fine, which what I had been really worried about. I had been a restless night last night, with weird dreams flitting through my unconsciousness and my worrying in the intervals. What had happened yesterday evening was only a mild example of something worse that could happen and me not being able to protect Bella efficiently enough. That was my worst fear: not being able to be the kind of person she needed. I was so deep within myself that I didn't even notice that we were coming to a stop until Alice spoke.

"What are you doing, Carlisle?"

Bella straightened and craned her neck to look out the window, apparently she wasn't as asleep as she looked. A blue mini-van was parked on the side of the road with smoke spewing out of its back pipe and its red lights flashing like two red eyes blinking at us through the wind and the snow.

"Do they need help?" Esme asked, using her chilled hand to wipe at the fogged glass.

"I don't know."

I opened the door first as Carlisle slid to a stop, flinching against the cold and walked over to the stopped vehicle without a second thought.

"Edward," I heard my father warn me quietly but I kept going with Bella behind me. The snow crunched loudly beneath our feet, announcing our presence to the rest of the world.

"This doesn't feel right," I heard her whisper and she shivered, her eyes darting around fearfully. I didn't respond. I wasn't being cautious and I realized that but I knew my guilty feeling and moved towards the window.

I knocked on the window and saw a young man sitting in the driver's seat. His head was turned to the passenger, his hands folded in his lap. He didn't appear to have noticed me. I knocked louder and the cold glass hurt my knuckles as they struck the pane. He still didn't respond. I could a bright line of blood trickling down his neck. He must be injured.

I hesitated only a moment than opened the car door and a strange, thick stench wafted out to greet me. I wrinkled my nose in disgust.

"Edward, wait!" I heard Carlisle command, but it was too late.

"Sir?" I was asking, reaching out a hand to shake his shoulder carefully.

The young man's head lolled than fell from his shoulders, hitting the steering wheel with a thud before landing in the snow, its eyes wide open and its mouth gaping. I jumped backwards with a wild gasp, the orange juice and toast rushing up for another visit. The crimson blood created a circle in the snow and the now headless body slumped over against the steering wheel.

Bella screamed and shielded her eyes and falling to her knees before she screamed again. Esme gasped and covered her mouth with her hands. Alice froze, her expression blank and her eyes dark. I could tell she wasn't breathing.

I fell back on my haunches, breathing rapidly, unable to rip my eyes from the morbid sight. I swallowed back the bile in my throat as Carlisle stepped in my view, blocking the scene. "I don't think I'm very hungry anymore." Then I doubled over, vomiting, wishing I was still a vampire.


	9. Chapter 9

The water in the toilet was like a clear sheet of glass, motionless, with a white streak of a glare from the ceiling light above. I rested my forehead on my arm which laid on the porcelain edge and closed my eyes for a momentary rest. The throbbing in my head had dulled but my stomach continued to churn, not agreeing at all with the juice and bread I had offered it earlier. I had tried some soup that Carlisle had coaxed me to eat but my stomach refused anything and everything, leaving me hungry and nauseas at the same time.

I could hear the soft whistle of the wind outside the bathroom window, muffled by the thick glass. Snow plastered the pane separating the room from the outside and icicles hung from the sloped roof; they shivered and tickled as they clung precariously to their spots, as though desperate not to fall. I straightened briefly and pulled my hands inside my hooded sweatshirt and resumed my previous position with the hood bunched up around my neck. Even through my jeans, I could feel the coldness of the marble tile digging into my knees and shifted, searching for a more comfortable position than gave up when I realized that was not possible while sitting on the bathroom floor.

There was a creak as the door opened. "How're you feeling?" Alice asked softly; suddenly at my side and rubbing my back with her cool hand.

"Awful," I groaned, peering at her from through half-opened lids. She looked comfortable in a black tank top and tight jeans and feet bare, unaware of the dropping temperatures.

"Are you hungry?" she asked, her hands moving to massage my shoulders, I could feel my tense muscles relaxing slightly.

"No."

There was a moment of silence before I spoke again, "where's Bella?" I asked, opening my eyes to look at my sister. I saw a strange look pass over her face.

"She's teaching Emmett origami." Alice smiled, a hint of laughter making her eyes sparkle like orbs of gold.

"Origami?" I questioned, frowning. "Bella knows origami?"

"I guess so," she shrugged and studied me, her eyes unreadable. I wished I could know what she was thinking. "I think she's just trying to keep herself busy; she's awfully worried about Charlie. Emmett's the only one who seems to be relaxed. Carlisle's pacing and Rosalie's moping around. Jasper and Esme are just sitting there watching Carlisle."

I hesitated to ask the question that had been burning at the tip of my tongue, "Rosalie...how is...?"

Alice's face darkened and rocked back on her heels. "To make it straight and simple-"

"And honest," I added.

"Yes, and honest, at the moment...she hates you."

"I could've guessed that," I grumbled, daring myself to lean away from the toilet and rest my back against the wall. Alice followed my example and drew her knees up to her chest. We sat like this for several minutes, listening to the noisy storm raging outside. "And why, do you presume, does she hate me?"

Alice hesitated, "Well...I think it's mostly Carlisle. She looks at you and sees what you became and automatically, she thinks we should run off to find this thing. Hey, if all it did for you was turn you human in less than two days, something she has been longing for years for, how bad could it be? I mean, we all agreed as well but..."

"But Carlisle won't let you." I finished grimly. "What? Does he think I'll drop dead any second or something?"

Alice shook her head slowly. "I don't know. I think he's just being cautious...he doesn't want to...jump to conclusions, you might say."

"I love being a guinea pig." I said sarcastically. "Do you realize that Carlisle also tried the vampire thing on me as well?"

Alice made a face. We were silent again. Then:

"What's it like?" she asked, breaking our moment of quiet. I knew immediately what she was referring too.

"Being human?" I huffed out a short laugh. "How am I supposed to know? I've haven't had the chance to actually think about it-with everything from stalking monsters to headless corpses-I'm not sure what to think. But at the moment, I feel very...well...weak and vulnerable..." I grimaced. "I hate it."

Alice pondered this. "You hate the fact of being human or feeling weak?"

I sighed. "I don't know." Suddenly, I felt my stomach squeeze up and I doubled over, feeling my heart beat spike within my chest. "Am I going to throw up?" I asked her with a pained voice, scooting towards the toilet again.

She watched me expressionlessly, "I don't know," she said finally, sounding as though she was admitting to a horrid crime she had committed.

"You don't know?" I spat, feeling my stomach give a heave and I gagged, finding with gratefulness that nothing came out.

"When that thing tampered with you, you totally disappeared from my visions." Alice enunciated slowly, seeming afraid to put me into shock or something. Instead I felt angry.

"_That figures_," I automatically flushed the toilet, smacking the handle harder than necessary, though there was nothing in the bowl. I watched the swirl of water spin like a small hurricane down into the hole. I scowled. "I don't have anything left in my stomach anyways."

"I'm sorry," she really did look apologetic, "You don't know how horribly useless it makes me feel-and _normal_." She shivered, her large eyes pleading.

"Welcome to my world," I muttered, using the rounded edge of the sink to hoist myself to my feet.

"It's like you've vanished off the face of the earth along with the werewolves."

"That's temptingly funny," I said sarcastically, testing my stomach to see if it would hold out.

"I wasn't trying to be," Alice countered, watching me as I turned towards my bedroom.

"Whatever," I sank back to the bathroom floor, changing my mind, feeling too nervous about leaving the toilet for too long.

I turned my face from her, so she couldn't read the emotions suddenly bubbling up inside of me. In reality, I was alarmed-that was putting it mildly. What had that thing done to me? I felt slightly panicked, wondering if I would end up like Addy or something close to that effect. There had to be a catch to this human thing-and I was pretty sure Carlisle thought there was too or he and the rest of my family would be streaking like bullets to find this so called 'monster'. I began to trace the cracks between the tiles on the floor, still keeping my eyes turned from Alice's piercing gaze.

Could Jasper feel my emotions? I paused and thought-yes, he could for I remembered the feeling of peace he had sent at me in the cabin. So, why couldn't Alice see my future? She couldn't see Addy's future either...did that mean anything? She also couldn't see the monster's future, too. Was there a connection? Addy to the monster...the monster to me... nah, there couldn't be a connection; I started to follow the cracks again. Could there? I hadn't been able to hear her thoughts, but I couldn't hear Bella's thoughts as well-that didn't mean she was a monster. I turned these thoughts over in my head, grimacing as my stomach tightened threateningly. I rubbed it absentmindedly. Jasper wasn't able to feel Addy's emotions, nor control them in any way. Did that mean something? That she had no emotions?

I shook my head and relaxed my hand, staring at the ceiling yet not really seeing it. I had never seen such a wide range of emotions displayed by someone in mere minutes as Addy does, vampire or human. Not even Bella could compete with her dramatics.

"Did you come up here just to stare at me or was there something else you wanted?" I asked, eyeing Alice who sat like a statue against the wall. The statue came to life and crawled gracefully closer to me and folded herself down only inches from me.

"What are you concocting in that head of yours, Edward?" Alice asked, tilting her head to one side as she tried to read me.

"I don't know," I said honestly and she said nothing else. I stopped trying to think all this through because my head was beginning to hurt.

Alice leaned her head back and closed her eyes, looking serene. Then: "The lights are going to go out."

"What?"

Just then, the light bulb hanging over head flickered than blinked out, plunging both me and Alice into an almost complete darkness. We didn't speak. I blinked my eyes several times, trying to get them to adjust to the suddenly absence of light. It didn't seem to. I sighed in frustration. "Alice?"

"Hmmm?" A very faint glimpse of white caught me peripheral vision.

"Nothing." I reached out hesitantly and my fingers touched something ice-cold.

"Are you alright?" Alice asked in the dark, her voice just a whisper.

"It's just kind of disconcerting not being able to see anything."

I heard a soft laugh. "I can see you perfectly fine. You look a bit perplexed."

"I feel _more _than a bit perplexed."

"Maybe you should sleep," she suggested.

"In the bathroom?" I snorted.

"Why not? If you're going to get sick again, you might as well stay in here." Her logic bugged me.

"Whatever," I grumbled, carefully resting my head against the smooth edge of the bathtub. Despite my negativity against Alice, I fell asleep almost right off the bat, my mind drifting as she hummed a gentle tune.

_A woman, her long locks of coppery hair cascading down her back, sat at a piano bench. She was wearing a white, simple dress with a blue ribbon tied around the waist, but it made her beautiful-a simplistic beauty that not many woman could master. Her fingers moved along the keys in a poetic dance, creating a light, soothing melody that hung in the air like sparkling stardust. Beneath her, a careworn dog curled up under the bench, its liquid brown eyes large and happy. The windowsill was overflowing with flowers-white, pink, and red-they spilled over the wood frame and sprinkled the floor with petals, like silky pieces of confetti. The golden beams of light shone from the open window, enveloping the room with its warm hug. It gave the woman at the piano a glowing halo, warming her hair till it looked like soothing fire._

_I reached out to touch it, to feel the velvet hair but my hand fell through air and I realized that I was suddenly alone. The sun had disappeared and the flowers had wilted. The woman was gone and the piano stood solitary, dented and scraped, as the dream faded to darkness. _

I jerked awake and turned, my head cracking against porcelain. "_Ow_," I hissed.

"Are you all right?" Alice's voice came to me in the blackness of the bathroom.

"Yeah," I answered, rubbing at the tender spot. "How long was I out?"

"Only thirty minutes. You feeling better?"

Aside from feeling sore and achy, my stomach no longer roiled its protest. "I'm fine," I stretched my arms out and, hearing my elbows pop, let them fall back down. I stretched out my hands and patted down my surroundings, trying to create a mental picture of where exactly I was positioned.

"Do you need help?" my sister asked as I let my hands feel up the side of the sink.

"No." I answered, gingerly curling my fingers around the edge of what I thought to be the sinks edge. I used it once again to heave myself to my aching feet. "When are the lights coming back on?"

"I'm not sure but it looks as though it will stay out the rest of the night."

I tilted my chin back and glared at the ceiling though I knew it was a useless feat. Suddenly, I heard Alice groan.

"What?" I asked hurriedly, feeling anxious, I reached again for her in the darkness and felt the icy hardness of her skin against mine. I grimaced.

I felt Alice moving both of her arms and I guessed she had buried her face in her hands. "Between you, Addy, the werewolves, and the monster my visions are so spotty I might as well be blind!"

I opened my mouth to answer, holding back the smirk pressing at the corners of my mouth when I heard the cascading, airy bells of the doorbell being rung.

"Who's that?" I moved as quickly as I could through the darkness, feeling for the doorknob and pulling the bathroom door open.

"Ugh," I heard Alice practically gag. "Werewolf."

"Speak of the devil," I muttered.

"Wait," Alice grabbed my arm in a vice grip.

"Ow!" I exclaimed, feeling for sure that she bruised my arm. Her hand dropped away.

"Sorry. I forgot." Alice offered meekly.

"Obviously," I grouched, rubbing my sore arm.

"I don't think Carlisle wants you down there right now." Alice went on as though she hadn't heard.

"What?" I shook my head at the ridiculous notion and went past her ghostly body.

"Edward," her voice came as a warning, icy and firm, sending an unwanted shiver down my back. "There are werewolves down there who don't know of your...condition-"

"Condition!" I cut in, raising my voice in my anger.

"You're human now, Edward," she lowered her voice in contrast to mine, "You have to accept that fact. You will be standing in the middle of a group of vampires and werewolves and if something goes wrong, you could be killed!"

"I don't care, Alice," I spun to head for the stairs but an icy fetter locked around my upper arm.

"You will stay," she commanded. Even in the dark, I could feel her seething glare burning gold. I tried to twist away from her grasp.

"Let go!" I said between gritted teeth. "I'm apart of this family, I should be aloud to join you down stairs! You are not my boss!"

"Nor do I choose to be, but I am your sister and I care for you and I say you will not go down stairs."

"What is going on here?" Carlisle suddenly appeared beside us, carrying a flashlight, his silhouette glowing in the white beam he kept pointed towards the ground.

"Since when did you need a flashlight?" I said spitefully, my eyes stinging from my anger and the pain of Alice's hand so tight on my arm.

"It's for you," Carlisle answered calmly. My glare grew darker.

"Let go of me, Alice," I demanded, jerking my arm but finding I could not match her strength.

"Only when you stop acting like an arrogant idiot," she snapped back and her cold fingers tightened even more.

"Alice, let him go," Carlisle's voice was obdurate and she immediately released my arm.

Carlisle pointed the beam at me and I could see his face pulled into a frown. "You will stay up here. I don't care what you do but you will not set foot on those stairs. Things are very tense down there and I don't want you or Bella caught in the crossfire."

"Carlisle, that isn't fair," I complained, balling my fist in a struggle to keep my voice down. "I have a right-"

"You have no right actually. This is my home and you will do as I say. Do I make myself clear?"

I didn't answer, only turned my head away from the beam and crossed my arms defiantly. Carlisle sighed.

"Edward, I just don't want you hurt. Stay up here until they're gone then you can come back down. Please try to understand, I just want the best-"

"Don't talk to me as if I were a child, Carlisle." I snatched the flashlight from his hand and jerked backwards when he moved to touch me. "You are not my father so stop acting like it!" The moment I said those words I wanted to somehow stuff them back into my mouth. Carlisle gave me no response; he only stood there watching me in the dark.

Then: "Edward, just go to your room-"

Before he even finished his sentence, I turned, slamming the bathroom door in his face, and vomited into the toilet.

I stared at the ceiling above my bed, spinning the flashlight's beam so that it created a blurred orb above me. I watched it without really seeing it, deep in thought. I had never had such a conflict with Carlisle before nor Alice. Maybe it was just teenage hormones, like Bella goes through with Charlie. I sighed and turned on my stomach letting the shaft of light drop to the gold carpet, my arm hanging over the bed. Even in the dimmest of light I could see the dark bruises spotting my right arm when Alice had grabbed me. I knew she didn't mean to but it still made me angry every time I thought about it and I closed my eyes, trying to will myself to sleep.

There was a sudden, light knock at my door.

"Wha-at?" I groaned, sitting up and wheeling my flashlight at the door. It was open ajar. I narrowed my eyes and waited. "Who's there?" I demanded. There was still no answer. Maybe I had dreamed it. I foolishly aimed the light on the battery powered clock, even though it was unneeded and read the emerald numbers. It was only 2:30 am. This night was dragging on.

"Edward?"

I whirled the beam to find Addy sitting inches away from me on the bed. "Gah!" I yelped, falling backwards and landing with a dull thump on the carpeted floor.

Addy's pixie-doll face appeared over the edge of the bed. "Can I talk to you?"

"What are you doing in here," I hissed, jumping up, trying to retain some of my dignity.

"I just said that I wanted to talk to you." The tiny vampire straightened as well. I had my flashlight glowing right in her face but it didn't seem to bother her. As I examined her white face, dotted with freckles and her gray eyes-I stopped. My stomach jolted and I suddenly felt nauseas.

"What do want?" I said the words roughly, trying to piece together the puzzle that was becoming more and more complex in my head. Addy's face didn't change but I noticed a stir in her eyes.

"Have you ever been in a spot...a situation...that you never wanted to be in...that you never expected to happen?" Addy pulled at the threads to a pillow case, lowering her eyes away from mine.

I studied her in confusion, lowering the beam slightly. "I'm not following you."

Addy screwed her face up as though to cry and her hands curled into fist. She glared at the comforter and we sat in dark silence for several moments. I waited.

Then: "I'm just as confused at you-" she whispered. "There's so many things happening and there are so many choices to make and I don't know what is right anymore. Things are more complex than they told me." With that said, she buried her face in her hands.

"Who told you what," I asked quickly. A piece to the puzzle in my head began trying to fit in.

She didn't answer.

"Addy, if you know something-" I grabbed her arm, trying to make her look at me than immediately snatched my hand back. Her arm was void of cold, her skin pulsed warmth.

"You're not cold," I gasped, fumbling with my flashlight which I had dropped.

Addy was breathing fast now, clutching her head with both hands. I thought I heard her groan.

"What are you," I demanded; my voice shook slightly, taking some of the firmness from my tone. Addy only shook her head, rocking on her knees. I narrowed my eyes at her, keeping the light in her face. "You're not as innocent as you seem...are you?"

Addy didn't offer a contradiction or an agreement, shaking her head, refusing to even look at me.

"Addy," I said slowly, enunciating each word in deliberate slowness. "Do you know what's going on here?"

Nothing. I became more urgent.

"_Do you_? Do you know why all of this has been happening?" my words came out swift and angry and I realized my heart was beginning to pound inside my chest. "Do you know what that thing is?"

She finally looked up. As she spoke, her child-like innocence dripped from her words. "People die all the time-why should _you_ be any different?"

My pulse spiked and the room began to spin. I drew in a deep breath. "What are talking about? Is something going to happen to me?"

Addy squeezed her eyes shut and pressed her lips into a thin, stubborn line. Out of pure frustration and panic I threw the flashlight to the floor with all my might, knocking the light out. I grabbed Addy's shoulders in the dark and shook her hard. "Answer me, Addy. _Answer me_!"

A sound erupted from Addy-a sound that was completely and deeply inhuman. A sound that I never heard anyone or anything make-somewhere between a scream, a snarl, and a gut-wrenching sob. She moved so fast, she was a blur. Suddenly, I was on the floor, my head bursting with pain and my eyes dancing with color. I managed to roll over and I sought the flashlight, found it, and hit it hard on the rug. Light burst forth and I frantically searched the room for her. I found her only a few feet away.

I nearly dropped it again.

Addy's eyes were wide open but had rolled back into her head so that her irises were hidden. Her white eyeballs stared ahead, sightless.

What looked like mucus ran from both nostrils and mixed with foaming venom that seeped from her mouth. Her wet curls trembled as she shook on the floor.

The girl's head moved. Turned slowly toward me. Her mouth parted and she began to suck air in short, tight gasps. Her nostrils flared with each inhalation.

I slowly backed towards the door, inching around her.

Addy dragged in another deep gasp and her back arched as she inhaled. Her mouth opened wider and she growled at me as I past. Foamy bubbles popped in the corner of her mouth.

And then her jaws clamped shut and she began to whimper. A desperate cry for help from a wrinkled face. Her eyes righted themselves for a moment, irises grayed and cloudy, then rolled back into her skull.

I felt my heart rise to my throat. My own fingers were quivering, perhaps more than hers. I bolted for the door. "Carlisle-!" I leapt into the hall and tripped over a tray of food. My head cracked against the opposite wall and I saw stars. When I rolled over, I caught a glimpse of the downstairs through the banister. My heart crashed into my throat.

Then monster was here. It was pacing, growling and snapping as my family circled it. Jasper feinted towards it and the thing took a swipe-he jumped back just in time. _Holy shit! _I scrambled softly to my feet. I jabbed my flashlight towards Addy again.

"Addy?" I whispered. Addy's jaw stretched in a silent scream; her body shook with such force that she looked as though she would fall apart like a cheap toy.

I hesitated for one second than sprinted for Alice's room. I had to get Bella out of here. With the flashlight guiding my way, I made my way to the room, mentally mapping out a plan to get her out safely, without any harm.

I threw open the door and threw back the covers concealing the curled up lump in the middle of the bed. Bella's eyes flew open; I clapped a hand over her mouth lest she screamed.

"We have to get out of here," I whispered urgently, "Don't scream-just follow me." She nodded slowly, her eyes wide. "Don't talk," I instructed, releasing her and spinning the flashlight around the room, looking for anything hidden.

Bella grabbed the hooded sweatshirt I had let her borrow from the bedpost, pulled it over her head, and I grabbed her good arm and led her back down the hall. I paused momentarily in front of my room and let my flashlight give a sweep of light in.

She was gone.

I didn't have time to think about it. Shaking my head, I took us to a large tapestry hanging by Carlisle's office. I pushed it aside and revealed a hidden door with a large brass knob. When we had first built this house, Carlisle had insisted on this for reasons _I _didn't even know. But, as me and Bella slipped into it and I quietly latched it shut, I silently blessed his genius thinking. Carlisle sure had a way of making things work out just right. Did he have any idea that a day like this would come? The passage way led down two narrow flights of stairs and into the back of the kitchen where you had a clear ten feet to the back door.

"Edward, what's going on?" Bella asked finally, her voice panicked as I pulled her along. She clutched my hand tightly, her nails digging into the flesh of my palm.

"It came back," I said in a low voice, my heart giving a pang as I heard her whimper. "Shh, Bella, you're alright. I won't let anything hurt you." As I said this, I suddenly felt sick. For the first time, in I don't know how many times I had said this phrase, that I wasn't entirely sure that I meant it. Could I really protect if I was called to? Or would it just be a repeat of the chaotic night at the cabin? I twisted the doorknob at the end of the tunnel and we both spilled out into the kitchen. What I was doing-running like this-felt the cowardly act above all other cowardly acts?

Maybe being a vampire wouldn't be so bad after all.

My heart stopped.

It was swaying, rocking from one foot to the other like a drunk, its empty eyes watching me without break. Its shirt was torn from the shoulder and a chunk of hair seemed to have been ripped from its scalp. It slouched over, almost in a crouch, its shoulder bones protruding from its back. As it breathed, its chest rose fast, producing a clicking nose that echoed in the kitchen. I suddenly wished I didn't have the light of the candles surrounding us or the flashlight in my hand.

There was more than one?

"Oh, god," I whispered, slowly backing away until Bella and I were pressed against the edge of the counter. The thing, the monster, seemed to look away briefly and I attempted a side step. Its head snapped back to me and it bared its teeth, a terrifying hiss escaping its lips.

It curled its hands like claws, preparing to spring. "Go!" I shouted, pushing Bella towards the backdoor, simultaneously dropping like a rock to the floor, waiting for impact as the thing leapt with blinding speed.

It didn't come.

There was a piercing cry and I saw a brief glimpse of brown and blue. Addy and the monster crashed into the refrigerator. The machine bounced against the wall than fell forward. It was faster though, with a growl reverberating from its chest it flung back and disappeared through the back door with a slam, tearing out the screen in its anger. The refrigerator crashed down on the linoleum, pinning Addy so that I could only see one of her small hands and her feet sticking out from the other side.

She was only like that for a moment though. With her newborn strength, she heaved up the large kitchen appliance and sent it sliding across the kitchen floor. It was back, hurling through the glass window, snapping its teeth at Addy and she arched her back and hissed like a cat in response. It was like they were frozen in a horror movie, both of them baring their teeth. They glared at each other, neither one making a sound. I saw Addy rise up slightly on the balls of her feet and the frozen scene split into action. They flew at each other, a blur, and met in a deafening collision. The kitchen shuddered beneath me from the force.

There was a scream and suddenly the monster was thrown back, into a row of expensive cabinets. The chandelier swayed above me, the glass crystals shivering on their gold chains. Addy righted herself up and something that looked like thick, yellow puss was oozing from her neck. Her chest heaved and her blue tee-shirt was torn. Bending her knees, she sprang towards the attacker, slamming into the wall again, creating a spider-webbed cracked dent. The bar from which the chandelier hung suddenly ripped halfway off the ceiling, thin wires sticking out like hair from the half-moon hole.

Addy appeared out of nowhere, taking my arm and pulling me with too fast a speed towards the back door; yanking me out of the way right before the light fixture hit the tiled floor with a tremendous, cataclysmic crash. Glass flew.

"Run, Edward," she cried, taking hold of the monster's arm and flinging it into the stove, which caved in, its white ceramic covering breaking into large, jig-saw pieces. I didn't hesitate to obey.

I went for the woods, knowing that this was the path that Bella would have taken, though the snow had already covered her tracks. I wondered how far she could have gotten in this weather and I prayed it wasn't too far.

I ran, tree limbs and brambles scratching, grabbing, tripping, and slapping me as if they were bony hands, reaching for me out of the darkness. I ran pell-mell, my feet unsure in the deep snow. I beat at the limbs with flailing arms, desperately searching for a sign of Bella, falling over hidden logs, getting up and darting to the left, than to the right.

"Bella!" I yelled through the blistery wind. "Bella, where are you?!"

Then all at once the ground was gone and I stumbled and went flying. I saw the tree braches whipping towards me. They slapped me, lashed me. I tumbled...spun...crashing through them. I grabbed a limb; it tore lose from my hand. Sheer terror and panic gutted my stomach, making me feel as if I were to be sick. My body smacked into another, slowing my fall enough to grab on; the rest of my body flew past snapping my arm at the weight. There was a loud _crack_ and fiery pain lanced up my arm. I released the limb with a gasp of pain and slid the rest of the way down, gritting my teeth at the jarring ride, rolling through the snow until I came to a complete rest at the bottom. I shivered in the wet snow.

"God," I gritted, clutching my injured arm to my chest. Bright, red blood began to seep through the sleeve of the shirt, a small splotch that quickly grew bigger. My hands were scraped and also bleeding. I turned my eyes away from the blood, breathing deeply. "Damn it!" I cursed, my eyes watering from the pain. I didn't want to look at it-but I knew it was bad and I prayed to all the powers of the earth that my bone hadn't pierced through. I struggled to my feet, managed to stumble forward a few feet before falling again. My equilibrium had been thrown off.

After a few minutes of panting in ragged breaths, I decided just to lie still to catch my breath and gain back my balance. Bruised, dizzy, nauseated, I went limp, trying not to move and waited as the icy twilight continued on.

"Edward?" warm lips touched mine pulling me from the slumber I had fallen in. "Edward, wake up." The voice sounded scared, close to tears.

I opened my eyes and saw a shivering Bella hovered over me, her hair damp and her skin white.

"I thought you were dead for a moment." She whispered, her fingers trailing from my hair and following the line of my jaw. Her fingers were icy against my numb skin.

"Are you alright," I asked groggily. "Are you hurt anywhere."

Bella slowly shook her head and showered me with another gentle kiss. She was terrified.

Using my good arm as a brace, I pushed myself upright and looked around. Twilight was fading into a gray, chilly dawn. The snow had stopped momentarily and we were surrounded by what could have been Narnia, judging by all the diamond like icicles hanging from the treetops and the thick sheet of pure white snow blanketing the earth.

"Did we go through the wardrobe, Lucy?" I mumbled with a sleepy grin.

"What?" Bella looked at me quizzically than in fear. "Did you hit your head really hard?"

I shook my head. "Never mind." I looked down and it was then that I saw the sleeve of my arm completely saturated with blood and I had left behind a bright stain in the snow. "That isn't good."

Bella looked towards the treetops, breathing in deeply and evenly. "I'm trying not to look at it." She informed, her jaw trembling. "You've lost a lot though. You can't go back to sleep."

I silently agreed. Looking around at the quiet world I wondered about my family and hoped that they were alright.

"I should've been there to help."

"What?" Bella snapped her head towards me.

I hadn't realized I had spoken aloud. "It's...it's hard being...human." I admitted sullenly, blinking as the snowy bark of the trees began to spin.  
I knew Bella could've bite back with a smart comment and, maybe in any other time she would have, but now she only nodded slowly, biting her lip and moving closer to my side. "I agree, Edmund."

I looked at her. She was smiling softly, her dark eyes sparkling from hidden laughter.

"So you did know what I was talking about."

"Well, duh." Bella punched my arm playfully.

"Ow," I exclaimed.

"That was actually the first time I've ever physically hurt you."

I glowered at her. "And judging by the mark you're going to leave me, it won't be the last time either.

Suddenly, Bella drew her knees up to her chest and she rested her chin on them, wrapping her arms around her legs. "I'm scared, Edward." She whispered, her voice breaking on my name. "And cold and hungry..."

A searing pain burned through my chest and I looked away quickly. She knew I couldn't protect her anymore. She knew I couldn't be the person she needed anymore. "Bella..." I stopped, trying to swallow with my dry throat. "I'm so sorry."

Bella curled up against my good side, resting her cheek on my shoulder. "I love you, Edward. That's all that matters at this point. As long as we're together-that's all I need. Even if we end up freezing to death."  
I closed my eyes, and rested my cheek on her hair. But I couldn't stop my mind from racing with 'what if' thoughts. "Bella,"

"Hmm?"

"I need to lay down...my head is spinning like a dervish."

Bella quickly sat up and began to pull off her sweatshirt.

"What are you doing?" I demanded angrily. "Keep your sweater on! I don't want you getting cold over me."

"Well, I don't want you lying down in cold with nothing under you."

"Than I won't lie down."

"Edward..." she started in frustration than suddenly let out a piercing scream, pointing behind me. I leapt about a foot in the air. "Oh, Edward-"

Suddenly Carlisle was there, with Esme, Emmett, and Rosalie. Esme immediately scooped Bella into her arms.

"Shh, honey, it's only us. We were so worried about you two."

"It was a smart thing to use the passage way," Emmett put in, keeping a good distance between us. I realized what was causing him to be weary.

Carlisle crouched down beside me and pressed his hand against my neck, checking my pulse. "Let me see your arm." He said softly.

"No," I said quickly, clutching my arm tighter to my chest.

"I'll be careful," he soothed. With gentle hands he pulled my bloodied arm away from my body. I winced but realized that he was being so careful that the pain wasn't too bad. His obsidian eyes were concerned but were also hiding something else-something bad.

"Oww..." I moaned when his fingers pressed against the swollen skin. I tried to pull the arm back but his hands were unmovable.

"You've lost some blood," he said quietly. He removed his collared shirt, revealing only his bare chest and wrapped it tightly around the arm, so fast that I only had time to gasp afterwards. "It's a pretty bad break." He continued.

"Carlisle," my voice came out hoarse and I realized I felt dizzy. Carlisle looked up, his face gentle and waiting for me to continue. "Where's..." I shook my head slowly. "I'm going to be sick..." I finished, my head falling forward when it became too much to hold up.

"We have to get them out of the cold and get them some food." Carlisle said, lifting me to my feet and supporting most of my weight. I remembered what I was going to ask.

"Where's Alice and Jasper?" I asked or more like mumbled, blinking fast to ward off the dark splotches.

Carlisle said nothing.

An edge of panic entered my voice as I interpreted his silence and I suddenly found the strength to look up. "Carlisle, tell me."

Carlisle lowered his eyes to look into mine. A swell of despondency filled them and he took a cold, marble hand to brush my cheek.

"Alice is gone."


	10. Chapter 10

_When everything is dark, still something shines._

_ -Narnia; The lion, the Witch, and the Wardrobe_

The Cullen house was dead silent and motionless. It was like walking though a museum after dark, when the doors have been locked and the lights turned out. They were statues, unmoving, unblinking, not even breathing, frozen where they were.

It was creepy. Unnerving.

For the first time since I'd know the Cullens, I was frightened to the point that my heart throbbed rapidly in my chest and cold sweat beaded on the back of my neck. Emmett sat in front of the blank television, the remote glued to his hand. He didn't move as I walked slowly in front of him. Esme sat in front of her easel, her head in hands, with her caramel hair falling over her face. Rosalie sat on the bottom staircase, staring out the window with large eyes, the fingertips of her left hand frozen to her lips. She didn't even flinch when I stumbled going past her. Addy was at the threshold of the front door, her chin tilted back and her eyes closed, giving the impression of serenity. But her fists were clenched so that her knuckles jutted out in sharp ridges.

What scared me the most was Jasper. As I rounded the banister and made towards the other flight of stairs I saw him standing like a displaced marble statue outside his and Alice's room, his hand on the doorknob and his eyes to the floor. When I passed him though, he came to life with the dramatic slowness of a horror movie. His eyes were black with a storm of emotions. Pain. Confusion. Anger. Hate. They followed my every movement without sound.

I began to run, my footsteps loud against the silence. I didn't know where neither Carlisle nor Edward was and I had the urge to scream out Edward's name but I didn't. I couldn't find the voice to do so. I tripped on the top step and went sprawling, but I refused to pause, rolling through the fall and flailing to my feet.

I locked myself in the bathroom and switched on the bulbs, letting the yellow light gush around me, blinding me and I had to squint. When my eyes adjusted I turned and nearly screamed in shock until I realized who it was.

She stared straight at me, looking lost and forlorn, small and pale. Her dark brown eyes looked muddy brown beneath the pool of tears welling in her large eyes. Her lips were turned down and her cheeks were white and streaked. Dried blood splotched a shoulder of her sweatshirt which still looked damp from the snow. Strands of her hair were plastered to her wet face while the rest frizzed in disarray. She didn't make an effort to pull them back.

She didn't care anymore. She didn't bother to care.

I hesitantly, slowly reached to touch her sad, frightened face; she mimicked me and I pressed the tips of my fingers against the satin smooth glass of the bathroom mirror.

The girl then blinked and a tear caught the fluorescent light as it chased a trail down her cheek and clung to her chin before she drew her hand back to wipe it away.

I waited for my hammering heart to calm, staring at the girl, at her large eyes, tear-drenched and sleepless red, widened by fear and anguish. Her pupils were retracted to pin-points. Her eyes seemed to take up most of her face, it was hard _not _to notice.

Trembling from the aftermath of the adrenaline rush, I sank to my knees, watching as my pitiful reflection sank from view as well.

So much had happened over the course of a few days.

I pressed the palm of my hands to the ceramic tile, feeling the coldness creep up my arms. Goosebumps blossomed along my skin and I shivered, hanging my head so that my wispy hair brushed the floor. I hadn't realized my hair had gotten so long. So long that in fact it fell to my waist, creating a curtain around me as I bent forward. Grief can be such a strange emotion. Sometimes it comes softly, unexpectedly, like a whisper of wind curling its self through a thick forest-barely noticed. Other times, though, it comes on suddenly, forcefully, grabbing your heart in a fist of iron misery, dragging you down to dark, depression filled depths.

And that was how I felt. As though my heavy heart was sinking deeper and deeper-as though each new thing was a brick laid on me...and Alice was the breaking point, where my knees start buckle and the weight starts to crush and I was struggling to keep myself from slipping under.

But I couldn't let it go. I couldn't breathe.

No. I couldn't believe it. I wouldn't believe it. I was being stubbornly stupid. I was grasping at air.

We were meant to be friends not matter what differences existed. We just had connected and trusted each other. Well, me trusting more than anything else. It was Alice who accepted my plainness, my blatant human qualities. She saw what I could be and she took me in as a sister.

I thought of the tiny vampire with bitterness setting deep within me. I could see her in my mind-her small, whippet thin frame, her black hair, disarrayed but never a hair out of place...her large dark eyes, sometimes gold sometimes inky black. That dazzling, innocent smile. Why her? Why was it that she had to go-to vanish like a wisp of cloud. I didn't even get to see her go-say goodbye, see her pixie face one last time.

Could life really be snuffed out that fast? Like a tiny, flickering flame when all it took was a quick puff and it was gone.

I scooted myself across the cold floor and leaned up against the door.

I wanted Edward now. I needed him. For the sake of my sanity.

Except that I couldn't have him. I couldn't even get near him since Carlisle or Esme were hovering over him like he was the only thing in the world.

Well, he was to _me_.

But he didn't seem to remember that. These last few days seemed to have driven us farther apart. He always seemed only inches from my grasp. So close but so far. It felt as though he was a stranger, a whole other universe. He was no longer the vampire I had come to love. He wasn't indestructible, fast or dangerous. He was just...human.

Like me.

He needed sleep. He needed food and water. He needed air to breathe or he would perish...I wasn't trying to be negative-I had often dreamed of Edward becoming human some how, some way, however impossible it seemed. I dreamed of us being of equal parts, on the same level. Not having to worry about being too strong or too weak.

Or too dangerous.

This was not how I wanted it to be at all. And all I wanted was Edward. That was all I wanted. Was that too much too ask?

I watched, lip trembling, as my tears splattered the tile and the top of my hands.

They were warm. I held real still. Like tiny, glittering diamonds, they settled on my skin-a clear, miniature orb that glinted from the ceiling light.

Would Edward be the same? Would he still love me through human eyes?

I curled my hands into tight fists and the orbs slid from my skin. I clenched them so tight that my knuckles turned almost as white as Edward's skin. Or what had been Edward's skin.

My heart ached with every beat.

I sat there, pain squeezing my heart. I wanted to stand but I couldn't see a thing through blurry, tear-filled eyes. So I became motionless like the Cullen family, curled up, feeling like a helpless little girl.

"Where's my mom?" I called pitifully to anyone who might hear. "I want my mom!"

No one answered.

Why I had cried that, I didn't know and probably never will. Perhaps there comes a time in every girl's life, no matter how old or young she was, when she just needed the loving, healing touch that only a mother can give. Or maybe it was just instinct pushing its way out of my confusion and trying to piece together a random solution. Hadn't every little girl grown up _knowing _that her mom could solve anything.

I began to cry, dissolving into a puddle of salty tears. But no one answered my weeping. I couldn't remember the last time I had cried so hard, felt such anguish. My tears turned to sobs-gulping, gut-wrenching sobs. I couldn't even sit up anymore...the pressure was just too great. I sank to lay my cheek on the tile, curling up in a fetal position, trying to create a small sanctuary for myself.

The word seemed a very cold place.

I continued to sob but now they were silent sobs-sobs of hopelessness.

The pain was unbearable.

I jerked awake with a start, feeling the floor beneath me vibrate. I pulled myself upright, pulling the sticky strands of hair away from my cold face. My eyes felt swollen and puffy and my head ached a fit to burst. I looked away, feeling muddled, trying to figure out my surroundings, why I was lying on the floor of a bathroom.

Again the floor vibrated and the vibrations trembled up my arms. Startled and confused I looked around, blinking rapidly, then I pressed my ear to the floor. I heard it then: someone was shouting-no _screeching_ in what sounded like extreme rage.

I jumped to my feet and unlocked the bathroom door, hurrying out.

_SMACK_!

I ran into someone and bounced back, hitting the wall.

"Bella!" Edward said in surprise, blinking fast. "Forgive me, I didn't see you there."

I couldn't find the voice to answer. So I stared.

His eyes, though not as stunning when they were a liquid gold, were still beautiful, two glittering, priceless jewels only inches away from mine. They had lost their agelessness, that ancient misery they usually held, and were youthful, young, seemingly unburdened by the troubles of the world. Being this close, I could see the faint circle of coppery freckles sprinkling his cheeks and nose. His arm was bandaged but I could see a fresh splotch of blood where the wound had bled through.

I shuddered, remembering last night and what Carlisle had did.

Edward hadn't known, but his bone had punctured through his skin-it seemed as though he had a high tolerance of pain. Carlisle had to make an incision in his flesh and push the bone back in, setting it in its place. I swallowed hard and breathed through my mouth to get the imagined images to dissipate from my mind of what I thought it looked like.

"Are you all right?" he asked, cocking his head to the side as he studied me.

"Yes, why?"

He only smiled. But the smile was weak and somewhat forced. Gently, somewhat hesitantly, he reached out a hand and touched my face with soft, warm fingers.

_Warm._

Startled, I took an involuntary step back, my heart thudding so hard I thought it would beat right through my chest. This time, Edward couldn't hear my reaction but he could definitely see the flush of red across my cheeks and neck. He dropped his hand, looking puzzled and hurt.

"Did I do something I wasn't supposed to?" he asked but then light suddenly dawned on his face. "You're not used to my skin." He assumed.

I nodded. "I'm sorry; it-it just startled me."

He didn't answer. He only touched me, his fingers tracing my lips and then my jawbone. We drew closer so that our noses were almost touching. For a moment, I believed he was going to kiss me but he suddenly turned away, his hand withdrawing from my face. He tilted his chin back and stared at the ceiling.

That was when I noticed the tears welling in his eyes. My heart broke.

"Edward?" I whispered, longing to reach out and comfort him but feeling unsure.

Edward blinked and a single glittering tear escaped from the corner of his eye and slipped down the side of his face. "I can't believe she's gone." As he spoke, his voice cracked, something I wasn't used to.

I felt the tears coming fast but I didn't move, didn't speak. I backed away, not wanting him to see my emotion. But it couldn't be helped. Even though Edward wasn't at super speed catching my reactions, it still wasn't hard for him to read my face.

"I didn't mean to upset you." Edward said softly, placing a hand against the wall for just because or for support, I didn't know.

What I did know was the anger suddenly flashing through me. "Upset me?" I snapped, struggling to keep my voice down. "Edward, how dare you say something like that? You have every right to be distraught after what happened. You and me both-"

A crash sent both of our heads snapping to the right.

"What was that?" I asked.

Edward didn't have an answer. "I have no idea." He grabbed my wrist. "Come on."

We both jogged towards the staircase and hurried down the steps. I was internally glad I didn't fall due to the fast pace we were obtaining. I could picture my clumsiness sending both me and Edward plunging down the staircase, ending up with cracked skulls.

We stopped on the large landing and, in unison, we leaned over the railing. Edward rested a hand on my shoulder and I could feel the warmth of his breath on my neck. But when I saw what was going on down in the living space, I almost had to look away.

"None of this would have happened if you'd just listened to me in the first place!" Rosalie's sharp voice split the room in half, dripping thickly with rage and hate "I told you to stay! But did you listen? NO!" Her black eyes seethed murderously and she paced the carpet like a restless lioness, her lip curling over her teeth.

I opened my mouth to speak but Edward's hand suddenly clapped over it. With his free hand, he brought a finger to his lip, gesturing for me to keep silent.

She was screaming at Jasper. I could hear the pain simmering beneath her words but that only fueled her all the more. I looked around for Carlisle or Esme but I saw neither of them. Then I saw Edward looking away and towards the top step of the stairs we had just descended. I followed his line of vision and saw Addy's tiny figure crouched there, with her large, unusually gray eyes peering down at us. She sat motionless, like a frightened kitten afraid of a dog that had just cornered it. I couldn't read the emotion on Edward's face and I suddenly, desperately, wanted to read the thoughts zooming through his skull.

With a blur of blue, Addy suddenly zipped past us and down the staircase.

I almost laughed at the look on Edward's face. "Now you know how I felt all the time."

He smiled for real this time and brushed wisps of my hair from my face with a tender hand.

I looked down again, blushing deeply and saw Addy attempting to slink past the three angry vampires unnoticed.

"I don't think this is good." Edward muttered to himself.

I thought the opposite though. Maybe seeing Addy would calm them down. I thought that maybe they would just go their own seperate ways and let the steam vaporize.

How wrong I was. I didn't know that a vampire's temper could be so volialtile. Rosalie turned on the small vampire with vengeance. "You!" she accused with violent spite. "Ever since you came along, all this damned stuff began happening to us."

Emmett seemed to agree. I rarely saw him angry or serious and I was a terrifying sight as he leaned towards the suddenly very, very small figure beginning to slink backwards. "I say we kill her."

Horror filled with inch of me as I saw the three turn on her. I suddenly felt protective of her, of her innocence. I lurched forward. "NO!" I screamed, making Edward jumped nearly a foot in the air. It only took him a second to realize what I was doing.

"Bella, no!"

His words made me stumble over the top stair and my socked foot slipped on the rounded, soft edge of the step. I flailed momentarily, trying to regain my balance. "Edward!" I gasped.

He lunged forward to grab me, snatching my upper arm. But my momentum was too much for him and what I had feared suddenly happened like a curse fallen over me. We were suddenly both crashing down the last flight of stairs, hitting the wooden bannnister and floping against the wall. I to break my fall or even slow it, grappling at the edges of the carpet and the wooden railing. Edward suddenly collided with me and I yelped when his head smacked my lip.

We landed in a heap at the bottom, our arms and legs tangled together.

"Owww," Edward moaned, pulling himself away from me. "Good God, Bella, are you all right?"

I sat up as well, bringing a hand to my swollen lip. "You have a hard head."

I watched as he gingerly touched the back of his head with the tips of his fingers. "You have a hard mouth," he said, wincing with the pain.

We didn't have any chance to examine any other possible injuries for the room suddenly erupted with snarls and bone-chilling growls.

The floor shuddered and I turned just in time to see four vampires make impact in the midst of a deafening explosion. I jerked my hands up over my ears, my head ringing from the immense sound. "Edward!" I screamed, my forehead throbbing.

I had never been in the middle of something like this before. Yes, I had witnessed their practice fighting but I had never seen them fighting out of anger. I felt as though I had been stuck in a bad horror movie but I was afraid to move for fear of drawing attention to myself.

I heard a cat-like shriek cut the air and Rosalie suddenly was airborne. She collided with the wall behind her which buckled on collision. I saw three portraits shuddered than fall, crashing to the carpet, their glass frames shattered. But she jumped right back in and all I could make out was a blur. And I was mesmerized and scared out of my wits, like a mouse caught in the eyes of a snake.

That is, until, Edward suddenly grabbed my arm, jerking a hand free from my ear. "We have to get back up stairs." He shouted over the noise of feral snarls. "It's too dangerous!"

Staggering, I stood and Edward pushed me ahead of him.

I felt as though I was moving through Jell-O as I attempted to run back up the steps. Maybe that was why when I saw Jasper out the corner of my eye lock his muscles on Emmett and fling him towards the staircase, towards us that it moved in slow motion. Like someone had stolen the control from the T.V. and pressed slow-mo.

But the moment Emmett's huge body hit the diagonal banister, time was flung forward again. The stairs shuddered and bent. Edward fell back and to the left landing near the threshold of the front door. I grabbed the railing with both hands and screamed when Emmett's rolling body fell into me and I fell the five steps and hit the floor face first with Emmett's crushing, unbearable weight on me.

I couldn't breathe.

Suddenly the weight disappeared and an outraged snarl came louder than anyone else's. I managed to look up and I saw Carlisle crouched over me, arms extended as Edward had done many a time.

"THAT IS ENOUGH!" Carlisle boomed with such authority I was surprise when the howling wind outside didn't even stop.

But the vampires did. They froze where they were and a crypt-like silence filled the house. Nobody dared move.

"How dare you lower yourself to such behavior!" Carlisle was irate-no beyond that. I didn't even know the word to describe how he sounded. His voice made chills streak up my sore back and shiver down my spine. For the first time since I had known the doctor, he actually _sounded _like a _vampire_. "You're acting like a bunch of newborns-I am _appalled_."

There was a deep silence and still nobody moved. Edward was being guarded by Esme who looked almost as mad as Carlisle sounded.

I saw Carlisle fling his hand out toward the crumpled, pitiful looking staircase. "Look what you've done to my house! _My _house. You've destroyed it-destroyed it like a group of mindless monsters!"

Another pause and Carlisle was just building steam. He looked at each in turn and lowered his voice but still was able to sound just as menacing. It came out almost as a hiss. "I brought you all into this house and I will take you out single handedly." He took in a deep breath of air and I realized he had been holding it. "I want you all out _now_! GO! And don't come back until you have eached learned how to control their temperament and keep a level head. _Now out of my house!_"

And then they were all gone like a whiff of smoke, leaving behind a trail of guilt. Only Addy remained, huddled in a corner, her head cradled by her hands. She was trembling but Carlisle ignored her.

He slowly turned than looked down at me with gentle, concerned eyes. Nothing like the creature who had just seconds before stood over me. "Bella, are you all right?"

I hadn't realized I had been breathing so fast and so rapidly. And I knew he could hear my heart pounding an irregular, violent beat in my chest.

He held out his hand and shakily I took it, but found I could hardly stand up for my bruised back. Carlisle practically lifted to my feet and held me up waiting for me to catch my bearings.

Then I burst into tears, burying my face into his marble chest, unable to stand on my own.

It seemed as though the world had gone mad.


End file.
